119. Consequences of Cutting


I have been, for the last several weeks, blogging about cutting. It is not easy, or pretty. But neither is cancer, and we deal with it everyday. Cutting is a nasty, horrific addiction. There is nothing quite like it, short of suicide. Though most cutters would claim they don’t want to kill themselves, they just like the sight of their blood, and the high it brings. Andi said she’s been cutting for a year and a half, even though she doesn’t remember why she started. “[For me] it’s like a drug. I get the high [when I see] the color of my cherry blood oozing out of my body, then when it dries the burgundy color it leaves behind.” 

No one cuts to end up paralyzed in her own emotional pain. But somewhere down the road, that’s where she finds herself.

Spending hours locked in the bathroom at home, or on the floor of a dirty bathroom stall, the cutter carries her precious tools with her wherever she goes—ready at any time to take matters into her own hands. To relieve the emotional pressure and pain she can’t describe, she resorts to slicing into her own skin. The dripping blood reminds her she’s still alive. No one to talk to, she settles for self-injury. The blade is her fake friend. The shame and the scars, her constant companions. Just trying to find her way through the rocky road of life, she can’t help but turn inward. 

I don’t want to be anything but compassionate toward someone caught in the struggle of cutting. But there is a time when it’s necessary to call it what it is—and expose the destructive consequences of cutting. 

Cutting Causes: 

1) Paralyzing, Emotional Pain 

No one cuts to end up paralyzed in her own emotional pain. But somewhere down the road, that’s where she finds herself. Someone wrote and told me that after the high of cutting wears off, you are left with even more pain. 
“I quit the cutting because someone once told me the truth, that you only forget about your emotional pain for a moment. It's like a drug—you come down from it and you feel much worse than you did before because you have to deal with the emotional pain that comes from cutting on top of whatever emotional pain you were already feeling.” 

One has to wonder how many countless hours and schemes cutters use to hide their physical scars.

Dara said she cut for two years, but still carries the weight of the emotional pain with her. “The couple minutes of relief are not worth the months of hiding and uncomfortable situations when people find out.” 

People who begin cutting are convinced their self-medication works. It is a shattering experience to find out later on, not only does it not work, but it is extremely emotionally destructive. 

2) A Body Full of Ugly Scars 

One has to wonder how many countless hours and schemes cutters use to hide their physical scars—permanent reminders of their tragic mistakes. Eddie started cutting when he was twelve. 
“I thought it was for me to take all my anger and frustrations out on myself, but I noticed the scars it leaves will always remind me of my mistakes.” 

Sidney is 14 and has been cutting since she was nine. 
“Those scars are there forever and every time I see them I’m going to be so sad about why I [cut].” 

Cutting is an ugly scar-giving enemy, who will constantly remind you of a dark past no one would want to repeat.

Not only are you left with scars for the rest of your life, it’s also very possible to get infections from cutting with something that is dirty or not sterile. It is also extremely possible to misjudge the depth of a cut, actually requiring stitches or even hospitalization. You can pass out or even bleed to death. You don’t want to die, I’m sure of that. Let’s face it, cutting is an ugly scar-giving enemy, who will constantly remind you of a dark past no one would want to repeat, or remember. 

3) A Sick Web of Addiction 

Most cutters never intend to become addicted to it. Liz said, for her, cutting was worse than drugs because she wanted to do it all the time. 
“You don't care where you are—it's almost like you can't go on without it.” 

Cutting can easily become a compulsive behavior, meaning the more you do it, the more you feel the need to do it. Your brain starts to connect the false sense of relief from bad feelings with cutting. The next time you feel the pressure building, your brain craves this relief. The urge to cut can seem too hard to resist. Your attempt to feel a sense of control over your life has ended up controlling you. 

JS commented about how all through high school she would try to stop, but then would go back to it shortly after. 
“Then I would feel horrible when I finished cutting. The highs weren’t lasting as long and the crash was even worse. So I began cutting more, deeper, and more frequently. Being very interested in psychology I knew the chemical reasons, but I was already hooked and couldn’t stop.” 

You know I care about you very much—enough to tell you the truth. But let’s get down to it. If you are a cutter, it’s time for you step back and take a good look at what you’re doing to yourself. It’s time to tell yourself the truth. 

Cutting can easily become a compulsive behavior, meaning the more you do it, the more you feel the need to do it.

  • Are you addicted to cutting?
  • Does the cutting actually help you deal with the emotional pain you’re going through, or does it just cover it up?
  • Do you feel more worthless and stupid the more scars you see on your body?
  • Are your friends worried about your cutting?
  • Do you spend large amounts of time trying to hide your cutting?
  • Have you told yourself you want to quit, but can’t?

If the answer is yes to any of these questions, you or someone you know, desperately needs to read next week’s blog. It could be a life-changer. 

I still want to hear from you. What healthy ways have you learned to deal with your emotional pain? 
Please let me know how you have escaped from the addiction of cutting. We’re going to talk about this next week.

 

 


Posted 10-23-2009 3:00 AM by Dawson

Comments

Paige Schrader wrote re: Consequences of Cutting
on 05-17-2010 7:09 PM |

I am 14 and have been cutting since i was 12. my youth minister has helped me look to God for help and its been 3 months since i last cut...all i say is dont start its not worth the pain that you get as a result!

Courtney Nichole wrote re: Consequences of Cutting
on 05-25-2010 10:02 PM |

I honestly don't feel the pain when I cut. It doesn't hurt after I do it. I heal to fast to worry about hiding it and I find the scars interesting looking and I am addicted, even reading this I make excuses and say that I don't want to stop. I yelled at my ex boyfriend because he tried to do a wrist check so yeah I'm kind of messed up.

Courtney Nichole wrote re: Consequences of Cutting
on 05-26-2010 2:43 PM |

I'm sorry but I have issues with agreeing with these (for me anyways) really the only one I agree with is 3

erika wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 06-27-2010 9:29 PM |

i have been cutting from the point till i was in 4th grade i am now in 9th grade and i stoped cutting in febuary 2010 but started again. i dont know how to stop i have tried evrything. i dont scar even tho i have shoved a blade all the way threw my arm it never scard. for anyone who wants to cut dont because once you start you will never sto even medication wont help at least not in my case so please dont start dont be like me.

AnaGirl95 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 06-28-2010 7:58 PM |

I'm almost fifteen and have been cutting for about  year. I found that listening to Dawson has helped me a lot. I've been cutting for so hard  that when I do it really doesn't hurt much anymore. I have no one that cares enough to make me stop so I do it all the time. My mom knows I cut but only ever tells me not to kill myself. Just listing to Dawson has helped me to slow down.  Prayer has also helped, to stop cutting takes time but don't give up!

Hails wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 07-26-2010 7:58 PM |

hmm....i'm fourteen now. i started cutting when i was thirteen. i quit. reading these brings back the pain and the memory of the high. it makes me only crave it more. when i get the urge, i go to this website to convice myself of the truth. i can't get over that urge anymore. the memory alone is eating me alive. i'm emotionaly unstable. i can't have a serious conversation with anyone anymore with out crying over nothing. i'm not sure what to do anymore. i haven't cut for a couple months anymore. i need help. i just don't know who to turn to. i ask my parent to get me a counselor or theripist, they wont. please, does anyone have any suggestions?

me wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 07-31-2010 4:34 AM |

im 17 and ive been cutting since i was 14.. i started because i blamed myself for my bestfriends death.. i never tried to find new friends after she died it was like i just floated through school with no feelings i just existed you know? until the end of my junior year of high school which was about 4 months ago.. this girl in my class had turned into my bestfriend.. she didnt know about my cutting cause i always wore a hoodie.. i ended up spending the night at her house one night and without thinking i took off my jacket.. i dont think she noticed at first but when she saw my arm and all the scars and cuts she just looked at me and asked why? she wasnt mad just worried.. i ended up telling her everything and with her help im 3 1/2 months clean from cutting.. but i still find times when i want to but i call her and tell her first and she stops me.. but waiting is like wanting to rip my arm off its hard..

Amanda wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 08-04-2010 12:18 AM |

I am 18 years old right now. I have been cutting for 5 years as of this month. I started to cut because of my parents and they are the reason I continued for a long time. Then I found other reasons to cut. I cut more and more. Amost all of my teachers at school and my class knew I did it. The person who actually helped me though was my math teacher Mr. Sola. He simply listened. THL helped tremendously as well, they helped me be able to cry again, and to feel. However homelife did not get any better so I continued. I tried to stop on my own and I did ok. My record on my own was 2 1/2 months. I did have the help of a friend who thretend to tell my mom I was cutting again. Later I extended that 2 1/2 months to 4 because I let a lot of things out by talking to my teacher. I whent into treatment one year and 4 or 5 months ago. Treatment took me out of the sink hole I was in, out of the deep depression, away from cutting, and stopped the suicidal thoughts for the most part. I still have a lot to work on but I know I can get there.

I must say that I disagree with #2 because I like my scars. It is a part of who I am, and who my family is. My scars tell me stories. They are a part of my history. They remind me of my mistakes but at the same time they remind me of how far I have come in my life; as they mush into one another slowly I see more and more how I have changed and grown as a person. I would never wish my scars away. Sometimes I wish I had never started but on the other hand if I had not started I would not have gone to treatment to get help with things going on at home and elswere. If I had not started I would not be as close to God as I am now. Cutting is one of the big trageties in my life that have brought me to God. I know it is bad and that it also takes me away from God a lot but God helped me stop! :D

I have not cut consistently since I got out of treatment, and I have not actualy cut since Easter.

Needd Hellp wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 09-11-2010 8:00 PM |

I RECENTLY STARTED CUTTING . IT DOESN'T HURT AT ALL BUT AFTER THE CUTTS HEAL I KIND OF REGRET IT BECAUSE NOW I'M SCARED FOR LIFE INSIDE AND OUTSIDE

Jackiiee. wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 09-15-2010 2:23 PM |

I started cutting when i was 13 (7th grade) I honestly regret it.

when i started it thought it was "cool"

But then realized i got addicted and the more addicted i got, i soon got depressed.

I always had to wear long sleeves shirts or jackets to cover my scars. Its a constant reminder of that dark time in my life

Today I stare at them, regreting why I started.

I am turning 15 in two months.

Its been already two years without cutting

But i still have the blade hidden in my room...

Victoria wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 09-18-2010 11:03 PM |

I am 14 and have been cutting for a year. I stopped for about a month but broken hearted, I needed a way out. I feel it.. But the sight of my blood reminds me that I am still here.. I am still alive and kicking. Still somebody. I've been depressed for about a year and a half. I'm on medication for it and it seems to work but sometimes even the meds don't help. I just feel lost. I try to turn to God but it feels like He's not here. Nothing's getting better. My best friend and I used to talk all the time. He made me feel better. But now he has his happily ever after and doesn't care about me much anymore. It's a loss that cuts deeper than any other. And I need God's help here. I need SOMEONE's help. Because I can't do this alone. And I'm tired of feeling half alive.

Melody wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 11-05-2010 9:20 PM |

I never carried things with me. It wasn't only the cutting that gave me a release, it was thinking all throughout the school day that relief was coming as soon as I get home. I had like scheduled times I would cut myself every single day. Just knowiing releif was coming felt better, I was stuck in a cycle. I felt bad so I cut, then I felt bad about cutting, so I felt bad about myself and cut again... it never ends

Chelsea wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 12-02-2010 12:24 AM |

I'm 19 and this is my first year in college and so far from home, from the people I love and my family. I started cutting when I was 11. I cut for 7 years and I quit cutting about a year ago. My scars are there but i don't wish they were there. For me, those scars are a reminder (not a mistake) of the hard times I gone through. I'm not proud I ever did it, but it reminds me that I am like several, a survivor. Now that I'm in college depression has hit me really hard. I never got help for my cutting, it was just a choice to quit. Everyday is a major struggle to get through without having a thought or urge to cut. Everyday I can feel those urges and thoughts getting stronger and more frequent. My fear is that I will soon give in. I don't have health insurance which is a concern to me. I can't get help even if I wanted to. I don't know what to do anymore.

ms.niseylove wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 12-16-2010 2:08 PM |

hello,my name is shanise I am 17 years old, I began cutting in May of this year, though for years I struggled with deep emotional pain and emotional scars that occurred from abuse,low-self esteem,deep depression,illness,a broken heart,pressure,etc. I would literally cry for days... no one knew because I kept it covered from my family,friends,my abusers, and I even tried to keep it covered from myself. but in the end I grew tired and gave up I became very suicidal.I felt that I was destined to suffer, and that I was completely alone and isolated I literally thought that no one loved me. not even God himself. I was just so broken...I wanted the pain to stop, and so I began cutting. somehow cutting in my mind made my pain more manageable. I wanted to bleed, I wanted to disappear, I was hopeless...until recently when I was admitted into a psychiatric hospital for 11 days, which was 4 hrs. from my hometown, I was taken by ambulance on a 51-50 from my home by the police. I remember the pain on my mother's  face. and the sadness in my brother's eyes. I was not even expecting to go, (not like this) it was all to soon...And then the paramedic told me that God will always love me, and that this was his way for me to receive help. I've been home now for 2 weeks, and since I've gotten back I have been diagnosed with (MDD) major depressive disorder.placed on 2 anti-depressants and am receiving therapy and psychiatric help.and counsel from my Bishop, I still have very strong urges to cut (even now) but I belive that God will heal me, I know now that I have alot to live for...so I will keep singing,dancing,writing poetry, and doing things that make me happy!  I thank God for this website, God bless you all...      

Emily wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 12-27-2010 8:03 PM |

I'm 15 and I've been cutting for about a year and a half. I strongly dissagree with #2 I think peoples scars are beautiful. It will remind the people who have stopped how strong they are and how lucky they were to have made it though and survived.

Stasi wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 02-14-2011 12:30 AM |

Well I'm 14 and I started cutting in November of 2010 I haven't even been cutting a full year I cut during my Thanksgiving break... When I went back to school I told my friends... They told me I needed to stop... I tried and I tried... Then I didn't cut for the first part of December... then the day before my birthday I wanted so bad to cut... Then I didn't... But then my friends started cutting over guys and I freakked out on them for it because I don't think that that's a real reason to cut... Then One of my friends wanted to count how many scars I had on my legs and arms.... we counted like 250... the next morning i got up to 300 and I just couldn't stop... And Now it is february 14th 2011 and I have only like 10 new *ish* scars... And I'm doing better... But I just don't think some people have the right to call... people who cut *emo* it's redickulous... Oh well that's my story... and thank you Dawson McAllister you have helped me through many things... and every one you work think thank you for everything

Kristi wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 03-29-2011 9:06 PM |

I am 13 and I am addicted to cutting.

I don't even need a reason anymore.

I just want to cut. No, I need to cut. All the time.

I have times where I want help and get it.

But after I regret getting help.

I just cut for the first time in 18 days. I am so disappointed in myself. I am not better than my addiction.

I don't care anymore.

In the end it causes me more pain to try to stop.

None of these reasons seem valid to me.

I don't care about my life anymore.

I'm just done.

I give up.

MarisaM wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 03-31-2011 3:01 PM |

I am 16 years old. I started cutting when I was 13 and I haven't done so in about 5 months. It is extremely difficult and it can almost feel like drug withdrawal when you go without it for a period of time. I now have scars that won't go away. Cutting to numb the pain is not worth the consequences. I used to have to carry a safety pin around with me and drag it across my arm to keep my mind from going horribly blank I couldn't function without cutting and I still feel the need to do it now. If you are thinking about cutting, please don't, there are better ways to deal with stress, anger or depression. If you are cutting now, do everything in your power to stop, it is an ugly addiction.  

xochi789 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 04-04-2011 9:41 AM |

i am 16 i have been clean of cutting for almost a year/. its really hard cause i want to keep cutting latly cause if the crazy crap thats happening at home :/ help

Panic!WithCourtney wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 04-23-2011 8:27 PM |

About a month ago, i was going through...a lot of crap, i was fighting with my REAL dad, and failing a lot of classes, my best friedn told me she hated me...and, i fellt like crap...so i started cutting myself...and yesterday (April 22) My mom found out, and i feel AWFUL...i have never seen NEVER seen that look on her...that far distant "OMG" mental breakdoqn look of sheer dissapointment...and she cried..and i knew i had not only scared my wrist, but her heart.....i feel awful, to the pointi cant stop crying, and it hurts so bad...i never want to do that again....

FaithChick26 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 05-16-2011 7:36 PM |

Me and my best friend are both cutters. When another close friend asked why we do it, we both answered the same way. Its the only way to get out our emotional pain. And it still lets me know im alive. Now on my arms are scars. My best friend carved in her leg the name of her boyfriend. That was in December and you can still see it. With scars they remind you of what hapedn there. I dont want cutting scars to remind me of what  i did. People think cutting solves  their problems when all it does is create more.

Road Runnur54 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 06-13-2011 2:50 PM |

I just turned 16, and I have been cutting for only a little while now. In your blog, you say that it's hard for a cutter to hide her scars. For me, this is not completely true, and it makes it harder to stop

Road Runnur54 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 06-14-2011 8:28 AM |

I just turned 16, and I have been cutting for only a little while now. I'm terrified of myself because of it, though, because I usually can't stand physical pain, i.e. scrapes, needles, etc. My biggest problem is the scars: while my friends have seen them and mentioned them, they still don't know I cut, because I usually have countless scratches from thorns and branches in the woods where I like to run and explore. I just pass of the cutting scars as leftover from an excursion into the woods. I am trying to stop, but I don't know if this could slow my recovery or not. Help!

Jenny wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 07-03-2011 3:52 PM |

I just turned 13 yesterday. I have nowhere to turn. My life is terrible. My mom and I have been fighting forever. Fainally it got just too tough to handle with so I tried calling dawson for some. Instead of help I was told too wait and that no1 can help. I started cutting, thinking of suicide, no1 noes Im scared. A few days ago i read my moms journal and it siad she was suffering from depression because of ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I relly felt lonely then. My grades started dropping, I cut myself, suicide. I have thought of suicide before about a year ago my parents found out i got so mad. After that I started thinking I was too fat so i suffered from buleima I almost could'nt stop. My parents r soooo mean my dad has slamed me against a counter really HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My parents no nothing of this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like I can't go on with my life. PLZ HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Belle55 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 07-14-2011 10:19 AM |

I'm kind of new to the whole cutting thing, so does this still apply to me?

End the pain wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 09-05-2011 9:47 AM |

belle55 if you have the chase to stop stop as soon as you can cause you start there is NO stoping

nataliebelieve wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 10-06-2011 2:43 PM |

Heeey , My name is Natalie.

I cut. I AM ADDICTED to it.

i like the pain, well.. when i feel it. which is very rare because i never feel when i cut. it doesn't even hurt. i like seeing my blood.. i like waiting for it to dry...and then taking my blade and going even deeper..i like watching myself hurt. it feel good. and for some odd reason, i love my scars. but every time i look at them.. they remind me that its a battle with myself that i lost. but i think their beatiful. i started cutting in the 7th grade, i'm now a sophomore in highschool. i didn't cut a lot in the 7th grade. but in the last 5 months. i cut A LOT. every. single . night.

and people hate me when i tell them i cut..

and they leave me..

and call me mean names..

but they don't understand, how alive and perfect<3 it makes me feel.. even for that short. little while..

aceofspade007 wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 10-29-2011 9:59 AM |

No one really gets it. They don't really understand the people who cut themselves, because i'm one of those people

Easton_B wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 02-02-2012 4:56 PM |

im 14 and i started cutting last year. When people found out they were pushing me to stop  but it only made it worse. I woul dcut 3 times a week. I got addicted. Now im trying to stop for myself.I draw a cross on my wrist to remind me of what christ did for me and i wouldnt cut christ. This has been helping but now im gettting made fun of for it.

Hails wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 02-05-2012 6:37 PM |

I cut because I feel dead inside. The bite of the blade, the pain and the blood remind me that my heart still beats, that I still breathe. It reminds me that I am living not just a walking zombie. I hate the scars and having to lie to my family and friends, but I hate feeling dead. I have become a monster and I can't control it!!

LadyJ wrote re: 119. Consequences of Cutting
on 02-07-2012 4:17 AM |

I'm 16 and I was a cutter from age 13-15. The only reason why I had done it before was because I wanted to be with the "in" crowd but once I started realizing all the hurt and pain that I was really going through, I decided to cut on my own. I talked to my youth leader about it she was very supportive in trying to get me to stop. She kept telling me that cutting doesn't help your problems it only makes them worst and it adds a few more problems to the table. After talking with her a little more, I realized that I was only hurting myself and that nothing was worth more than me cutting myself over something. When you cut, you lose respect for yourself. My youth leader had to give me my respect back:)