It’s hard to believe that after over 130 blogs we are now talking about suicide. Suicide is never easy to discuss, but talking about it may save some lives. So if because of these blogs, one person is saved from suicide, it will be well worth it—especially if that person is you.
I’m amazed at the many powerful and wise comments I have received from you about suicide. Last week, I asked you to tell me why you think people contemplate suicide and you had some amazing insights. It’s clear that it’s usually not just one thing that compels someone to feel suicidal. You said it’s a combination of a lot of things, including:
- deep sadness
More than anything, I believe people who commit suicide feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want the pain to end, but they can’t imagine it ever going away. They can’t see the light at the end of a very dark, lonely tunnel. Have you ever felt this way?
When a person’s thoughts get so negative, about their circumstances or even about themselves, they can’t find a reason to live. They think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control. I believe first and foremost, hopelessness is a serious spiritual problem rooted in lies and incorrect logic. Anytime you believe lies about yourself, you’re listening to the wrong voices.
People who commit suicide think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control
Jennifer said suicide has been a daily struggle for the past nine years due to being sexually abused. “I feel like suicide is the only option I have left, the only chance at peace I'll ever have. It's as if something will always be missing and life will never be quite right.” There’s no denying that the pain of sexual abuse is tremendous. But the abuse is not Jennifer’s fault. She’s the victim, but she doesn’t have to take the punishment that is due to her abuser. Additionally, the world is filled with thousands of people who have survived and overcame abuse they have suffered. Jennifer, you can be one of them!
Have you ever gone through something so painful you were convinced the pain was never going to go away? Many people who contemplate suicide say something like:“I don’t want to die. I just want the pain to go away.” They think, “Because I’m in intense pain today, I will always be in pain.” It’s this incorrect logic that leads many people down the horrific path of suicide. As long as you have a breath, there is always room for hope.
As long as you have a breath, there is always room for hope.
For a person who wants to commit suicide, the fear of the unknown in death is less than the fear of living with pain for the rest of their lives. Suicide seems to be the ultimate escape—the ultimate pain-reliever. But as someone said once, “Suicide is too much medicine for the sickness.”
Bob wrote: “Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. My temporary problems never seem to end, but one day they might, or I might learn to handle them, and that's what I put my hope in.”
The truth is: Pain is temporary. Suicide is forever.
Kas wrote: “I think about suicide pretty much every second of the day. It seems like it's my only choice anymore. I know it's not the answer, but at times I just feel like I can't move on with this life anymore.”
You are worth so much more than just being a quitter.
When you start to think suicide is the only option, you are incorrect. That’s convoluted thinking, which also gets magnified if you’re using alcohol or drugs. Some people try to escape their pain by cutting, doing drugs, drinking alcohol, etc. In the end, these all fail—they never address the actual root of the pain, they only temporarily cover it up.
But by far, suicide is the greatest failure. When you kill yourself, you never give yourself the opportunity to grow, to get stronger, to write a great story with your life, and to experience hope and love from people in your life. You are worth so much more than just being a quitter.
Jordyn wrote: “Some people have suicidal thoughts because they want to escape the isolation, pain, and rejection from the environment surrounding them. Others simply feel they have reached a state of loneliness and depression in their lives to the point where their thoughts become so negative, they can't find any other reason to live. They would rather not confront it because of the fear of hurt that comes along with it, than confront it to rebuild their lives. I feel that when you go through times of depression and think about committing suicide, God is there by your side. He will not abandon you. It is only a matter of whether you reach out to Him through prayer that you will be free from these thoughts.”
There are so many healthy ways to deal with pain and hurt. Even though the road to healing may be long and hard, it’s a much better road to take than the shortcut of suicide. Amanda agrees there’s always another option besides suicide: “Just because you get into a sticky situation or face a problem does not mean you have to commit suicide just to get out of the situation!”
God has made you very strong person and you will get through this.
Whatever you are going through right now is only temporary. It will pass. It may be difficult and possibly the most challenging thing you’ve ever been through, but God has made you very strong person and you will get through this. I promise.
If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, please contact my HopeLine at
Next week I’m going to write about the cruel consequences of suicide, and what it does to the people left behind. Do you know someone who has committed suicide? How did it affect you? What would you like to tell that person if you had the chance? Thanks for sharing your story with me.
1-800-394-4673 or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, or visit suicidepreventionlifeline.org.