175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation

Last week I posed the question to those following me on Facebook and TheHopeLine: Where do you want to go, and what are the key habits that will get you there?

 

A lot of people talked about losing weight. That seems to be on just about everyone’s New Year’s resolution list. Even if they don’t generally have weight issues, after Thanksgiving and Christmas — who doesn’t’ need to loose a few pounds.

 

Having a clear and concrete reason for why you want to change something in your life will help you be successful.

One thing that I noticed in some of the comments was that losing weight was only a “means to an end.” In other words, the real goal was something else, and losing weight was what they need to do to get there.

 

Jamie wrote: my 2011 resolution is for me to join the marines and im gonna lose this weight and then im going to take the entrance exam...then im going to swear in....the only thing standing in my way is the weight i have to lose...

 

Kendra wrote: My goal is to lose 50 pounds, I have been struggling with my weight for a very LONG TIME. And im sick of being different from everybody else. So for the year of 2011 I wanna lose my weight and feel better about myself inside and out. But i think its going to be hard because all the other times if i wasnt seeing results i would give up. I hope I can finally do it.

 

So, joining the Marines and feeling better about one’s self — those are the real reason why Jamie and Kendra want to lose weight.

 

Having a clear and concrete reason for why you want to change something in your life will help you be successful.  Jamie very clearly wants to become a Marine.  If we were to press Jamie further (Jamie, feel free to comment here), we would find lots of feelings about why loosing weight is good.  It is sure to be a self image boost.  But the clear and concrete goal of becoming a Marine is what will motivate Jamie to work at it. 

 

If you want to change an old habit or accomplish a new goal find a clear and concrete reason to succeed, find someone who will join you in the effort, do it for yourself, and don’t become a slave to other people’s approval.

In Kendra's case, improving the way she feels about herself is her main motivation. All of us want to feel better about ourselves for one reason or another.  And no doubt, some people have lost weight with that motivation alone, but is chasing those good feelings alone enough to keep her losing weight when some unexpected stress comes?  

 

What Jamie has done, and what Kendra can do as well, is to lock onto a reason for wanting to lose weight that is more concrete than feelings alone. 

 

Without knowing the kind of things that motivate Kendra, it’s hard to suggest a specific concrete reason that will help her focus on accomplishing her weight loss goal.  However, whatever your reason, there are a couple of additional things all can do that will help keep us motivated to accomplish our resolution goals. 

 

1.  Don’t do it alone.

 

I wrote about this in last week’s blog. You’ve got to enlist someone to believe in you, be honest with you, and encourage you, and ideally pursue the goal with you.   Accountability is a very motivating thing. Even professional athletes pair up to work out together in the off season.  They need friends to hold them accountable and so do you and I.

 

2.  Do it for yourself, not for what others think.

 

Being motivated by what others think or by trying to prove something to others (family, friends, enemies, anyone) can be a very powerful but addictive motivator.  It just keeps you hooked on other people’s approval.  

 

If you want to change an old habit or accomplish a new goal find a clear and concrete reason to succeed, find someone who will join you in the effort, do it for yourself, and don’t become a slave to other people’s approval. 

 

Next Week: I want to talk about some attitudes that will definitely change your life and probably already have. So, here the big question: Being optimistic or being depressed, being gracious or being critical — what is your greatest attitude struggle and how has that attitude affected your life?

 

 

 

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 174. Habits: New Years Resolutions


Posted 01-06-2011 10:27 PM by Dawson

Comments

ashley james wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-08-2011 2:18 PM |

my attitude struggle is being sad and depressed because i miss someone that is special to me and that i keep in touch with and she is my best friend stefani and we met in high school because she was a special ed teacher that works with wheel chairs i love you stef

Kimberly (Facebook) wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-09-2011 8:54 AM |

My son is my reason for changing the way i do things.

Lauren (Facebook) wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-10-2011 11:00 PM |

My greatest attitude struggle is to stop being so critical of other people. I try and stop to think about the good in some of the people I go to school with but because of the rumors that they've started, I can't think of any...any advice?

Aracely (Facebook) wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-10-2011 11:04 PM |

My greatest struggle is having to see my daughters grow up without a supporting, loving and caring father! Since I come from a mom and dad based family! Breaks my heart to know that my decisions are now affecting what I love the most in this world! My two princess! Even though I will never fill the empty space they have in their hearts for a FATHER everyday I remind them of how much mommy loves them and no matter how difficult life is or how bad they mess up years from now, I will never turn my back on them!

Danielle (Facebook) wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-10-2011 11:09 PM |

‎@Aracely - From just reading your post, I can tell you that your daughters will grow up knowing that they are very much loved and wanted. Don't let the actions of someone else make you feel bad. YOU are doing everything you can for... them. And while they may not have a "father" they will know that mommy did everything she could to be mommy and daddy. That makes you one heck of a mother!!! So keep doing what you're doing and know that your girls are lucky to have you as much as you are lucky to have them!!!

joanna wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-11-2011 11:00 PM |

My reason for my attitude change. To be more social gain more friends spend less time alone outside of work and maybe find somebody to love. But most of all find someone who understands me the way I do and to enjoy and make the best out of the life I was granted

Megan wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-12-2011 5:27 AM |

My greatest attitude struggle is depression, & being gracious. I tend to get depressed easily when someone steps over the line and says something very very hurtful. Its weird, but when the people i love the most, do it, it doesnt hurt as bad as when an enemy says it. I believe its because i thrive on others approval. My second struggle is being gracious. Its very difficult for me to graciously accept a nice comment, or even if someone has invited me out to eat when they were willing to pay. I have a HUGE problem with that, but im not sure why. Probably because i've been a moocher my whole life & my parents raised me to believe it was wrong.  One of my BIGGEST struggles that goes at the top of the list is jealousy. Its my dream to travel the world, & when i found out that my mom had planned her 3rd trip across the US, i was hurt. I went on a big rant with my boyfriend and told him i didnt know what i was feeling. I told him the situation and described what i was feeling, and he takes my hands and looks me in the eyes and says "Megan. Thats jealously" I didnt know what being jealous felt like. I still struggle with it. Im not even sure jealousy can be over come.

Guitarslayer wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-12-2011 8:19 PM |

Please pray that doors will open for a career opportinity ive been interested in for a long time

dancin247 wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-13-2011 7:39 PM |

My greatest attitude struggle is being too critical. Not of others, but of myself. I'm constantly finding things about me that I am unhappy with. It's so hard to wake up and actually like what I see. It's starting to take a toll on myself, but I don't know how to stop.

Kendra wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-14-2011 8:54 AM |

Hi, dawson.! Thanks for putting my comment on there and responding. It made me think about the real reason why I want to lose weight. I think the biggest issue is if I dont see results soon my attitude gets bad. I think talking to some of my friends and asking them if they wanna work out with me would be good. Because then they could push me and not let me give up..

Thanxx Dawson so much..

Kendra :D

Julie Jensen wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-16-2011 10:47 PM |

Mine is to just follow God as close as I can to do right to my best to succeed in doing his will for my life one day at a time and keeping him #1 in my life over anyone. Everything else will fall into place, along with being honest, fair, and just.

anastacia wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-17-2011 1:50 AM |

I do not write reslutions but wanna lose weight to fit into a size 8 prom dress

Mjm wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-17-2011 12:49 PM |

My attitude is more of a  bad habit. I am usually to negative and critical most of the time. It's to everyone, including myself. I feel as if, not that I'm unhappy, that I'm going to be stuck like this forever.

gracie wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 01-21-2011 6:00 PM |

I'm going to start trying to respect my parents. They work so hard for me and I give so little back. I see my six siblings all ready to help while I hide in my room. I know it's January 20somthing, but it's never too late to start. I love my parents and it's about time I started showing it!

Dinacakes wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 03-21-2011 1:52 PM |

My resolution was to becone more under standing n compassionate. I lost the love of my life n lost my baby... I became very bitter n I realized its no ones fault but myself n God has a purpose for everything.

ROSIEX0X0 wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 03-21-2011 10:33 PM |

my greatest attitude struggle would have to be being very distant and depressed. it effected my life so much, i used to be so happy and now everything changed i have no friends and things get worse, lonely and extremely negative and lost in trust

Horse wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 03-28-2011 5:46 PM |

well i want to become a better person inside and out and get my buddies back together then maybe we all could start barrel racing together here in oklaHOMA

Jamie wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 04-21-2011 4:22 PM |

could you write about eating disorders sometime? i am having trouble with them right now.

mickie.m wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 04-24-2011 10:15 PM |

my resolution is to get my family back together before my illness takes over as far as  my  bro &  sis &  mom , to  make  peace and maybe just for  alil while be a ble to  be around  my daughter and her not  know i  dont feel well or something happen.  thats what ask is  pretty much a  mircle

ash2012 wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 05-02-2011 4:57 AM |

i have no motivation, to revise, look for ajob,  anything, im so depressed as well,

DorKs1 wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 06-12-2011 3:30 AM |

I got kicked out of skool two months ago for hookin up sum girls with bud

danielleblooop wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 06-28-2011 12:49 AM |

i have a problem well it all started where i met this guy over the internet and we started video chatting it has been a year and i have fallen in love him him i talk to him on the phone every night and he says he loves me to and he has a gf....not me and we are crazy in love but i dont really know if he loves me back he lives in Florida and i live in South Dakota  what am i gonna do......i stop talking to him and everything and told him i never wanted to talk to him agian cause i know its not gonna last and i dont want my heart broken and he started crying i felt so bad so now we talk agian and i love him so much its hurts and i cry

livingforthemaster wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 12-30-2011 9:52 AM |

My biggest attitude struggle is probably feeling like it can never get better....There has been a lot of abuse in my life. My stepdad was the abuser but he died 2 years ago. Now I just have to deal with all the pain he's left me with. I lived with the abuse for 10 years before he died and it stopped. I took it all alone, never told anyone. I've always felt like it can never end, it will never get better. Even now, 2 years since his death, I have horrible nightmares where I relive those nights with him and it's just like it's happening again. It affects pretty much every aspect of my life. I can't begin to think that it will ever be ok. It hasn't been ok since I was 4. Why should that change now? I guess it's all I've ever known and I can't imagine a life where it would be different--where things could be ok...

ldpyhala wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 05-26-2012 2:42 PM |

i have no mom mr dad but somebody stell loves me much

Schawnabug wrote re: 175. Habits: The Reason Behind Your Resolution - Motivation
on 08-30-2012 9:05 AM |

Im alwaysthinking that im to fat and cant wear shorts, im just so insecure about my body that i dont like about it..