How To Grow and Reconnect After Abandonment

If you’ve been abandoned, you’ve experienced deeper pain than most people can understand. You probably feel isolated and afraid that something similar may happen in the future. The fear and pain is even greater when a relationship that was supposed to be close or intimate ends in abandonment.

But your abandonment is not your fault. You can gain greater understanding of it. You can heal from it. And you can move forward.

Has Someone Abandoned You?

Abandonment happens when someone charged or entrusted to help meet your needs or keep you safe has failed to do so, either because they were unable or unwilling to do so. Your experience of abandonment may be:

Physical: Leaving someone without necessities and/or alone in an unsafe and unfamiliar environment. Abandonment often coincides with neglect so that safe and clean food, water, shelter, clothing, or living conditions are difficult to maintain or impossible to access.

Emotional: Someone may share a home, a family, or a relationship with you, but be unwilling or unable to do their share to care for and meet your emotional needs. Emotional abandonment is common when parents divorce, when someone is in the grip of addiction, or when they are living with a severe, unmedicated, or untreated mental illness

Spiritual: Spiritual abandonment happens when someone entrusted with your religious or pastoral care has neglected to help you, or has harmed you in a way that prevents or turns you away from your faith. People often feel spiritually abandoned if their faith community has ignored their concerns, has mistreated them without consequences, or has harshly condemned or judged them.

Abandonment and Abuse

Abandonment causes undeserved and inappropriate pain and suffering. Even if abandonment happens because someone is mentally “checked out” (rather than harming or neglecting you out of malice or cruelty), the hurt caused by abandonment is a type of abuse. It’s important that you do whatever you can to get help as soon as possible if you see any signs of abandonment in your relationships.

Reconnect and Renew

Even if you have many positive relationships, abandonment is traumatic and it can make you feel like you have no one to turn to. So how do you heal from that?

Professional Guidance: Being abandoned is not good for your physical or mental health. Do your best to make and keep appointments with your doctor or therapist.

Spiritual Practice: The pain of spiritual abandonment is among the most difficult. But there is always hope. Scripture promises that God will “never leave you, nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6). If you feel like you’ve lost your faith, don’t despair. There are people who care and who are ready to pray for you anytime.

Caring for Yourself: In whatever ways you can, make essential self-care tasks your priority. Eat when you’re hungry, stay hydrated, and get good rest whenever possible. When you start to feel overwhelmed, do simple things you enjoy to help you stay grounded as you heal.

Abandonment is painful to face and difficult to overcome. TheHopeLine offers a community of support to help you understand and process your abandonment and move toward safety, stability, and connection.

Through blogs, eBooks, stories, podcasts, find answers to these kinds of questions and much more:

  • Do I suffer from feelings of Abandonment?
  • How can I overcome my feelings of abandonment?
  • What does abandonment have to do with my addiction?
  • Why am I looking for love in all the wrong places?

FAQ on Abandonment:

How do you deal with being abandoned?

Abandonment is one of the toughest feelings to get through because of the sense of isolation that comes with it. One of the most helpful things you can do is share your feelings with a community or group of people you trust. Simply giving voice to your feelings to someone else can build a bridge that helps curb feelings of abandonment. Journaling may be helpful, too. Focus part of your journaling each day on people you love and are grateful for. These reminders can help you feel more connected.

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Most Recent Blogs on Abandonment

How to Have Good Relationships After Childhood Abandonment

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You Can Find Peace and Make Connections Childhood abandonment can happen in many ways. You might have felt abandoned as a child if any of these things happened when you were younger: One parent moving out during a separation or divorce Losing a parent or someone else you were very close..Read more

Healing During Grief: 6 Types of Loss That Will Cause Grieving

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When I say the word “grief” what comes to mind? Chances are, a time of sadness after losing a loved one, friend, or family pet to death. But death isn’t the only difficult life event that causes grief. There are other situations you may experience that can bring on the same..Read more

How Do You Deal with Being Abandoned?

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I've written blogs about physical, sexual, and verbal/emotional abuse, but there is one more kind of abuse I'd like to address...neglect and abandonment. First Understand What Is Neglect and Abandonment? You can be considered neglected or abandoned when you don't know where your parents are, if they have left you alone, or..Read more

How to Stop Abandonment Issue from Ruining Your Life?

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If you were abandoned as a child, one of the unfortunate consequences may be that you have developed a love addiction, but it doesn't have to stay this way. Becoming aware of how being abandoned may have wired you to be a love addict, the consequences of such an addiction..Read more

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Podcasts about Abandonment :

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Stories on Abandonment :

Abandoned: My Life Now Has Hope

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Felt It Was My Fault My Dad Left When my dad left 5 years ago, I started feeling like it was my fault that he left. I have been feeling like this for a long time. These feelings led to depression and anxiety. Abandoned Again Then I started feeling really..Read more

Eating Disorder: I Stopped Eating to Become “Good Enough”

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I had to think long and hard about if I should share my story. Then I came to the conclusion that it would be worth it if it lets someone else know they aren’t alone, and it could be therapeutic for me. So here is my story and what led..Read more

Don’t Lose Hope In Tough Times. There Is More.

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Chatting with your HopeCoaches seriously brought me through some of the darkest seasons in my life. Don’t lose hope in tough times. I have used TheHopeLine several times. It was a really powerful tool that actually helped me vent out stuff that had piled up for years, and now, I..Read more

Finding Hope After Abuse from Her Father

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Life of Abuse I was raised in a very dysfunctional family. My parents fought all the time and my dad was very abusive in all ways. My mom took this abuse all through the marriage for 32 years. I had no choice but to live with this. I only had..Read more

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Free eBook: Understanding a Relationship with God

A guide to understanding the basics of Christianity and a meaningful relationship with God.  Do You Feel Like Life is Meaningless? Are you wondering what your purpose is? Do you have questions about what Christians believe or what it means to be a Christian? At TheHopeLine we believe real and lasting HOPE can only come […]

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