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Talk About Sex

You don't need be ashamed or afraid to talk about sex. It’s a natural part of human life. It can and should be a beautiful experience.

But if you’ve been a victim of sexual abuse, trafficking, sexual assault, or have addictions to unhealthy sexual behaviors, sex becomes shameful, frightening, and isolating.

You may feel worthless or used. You may feel like you can’t stop your addictive sexual behavior. Maybe you’re afraid that your future romantic relationships will become sexually abusive or unhealthy because of past trauma.

If you are struggling with any of those feelings, they can be powerful, but there is hope.

We’ve helped people addicted to sex and pornography break free from their feelings of desperation. We’ve supported people who’ve been sexually assaulted, sexually abused, and trafficked in their journey toward healing and wholeness. We’ve offered prayer for people who felt completely closed off, and helped them to open up about their experiences with sex.

Wherever you are in your understanding of sex and how it shapes your life and relationships, we can help you gain clarity, find peace of mind, and let go of guilt, despair, and other emotions that leave you feeling trapped.
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What We Know About Sex


Many people have unhealthy relationships with sex, and many have been victimized by sexual assault, abuse, or misuse. You are not alone. There are people who feel your pain and know your struggle.

You are a human, not an object. Your body is still a temple (1 Corinthians 16:9) and still sacred. What you have been through does not change or tarnish who you are. You are no less valuable and are just as worthy of love as you were before your sexual struggles began.

A healthy understanding of oneself and healthy boundaries in relationships are integral to a healthier understanding of (and relationship to) sexual relationships and behaviors. That clarity comes from talking about sex with someone you can trust: a mentor, a therapist, a physician, or someone in your faith community.

Physical

Sexual Intercourse is a beautiful and healthy physical activity within any committed marriage relationship. When sex occurs between two people who love and care for each other it both physically and emotionally pleasing. However, sex with many random sexual partners can lead to contracting a sexually transmitted disease such as chlamydia, gonorrhea, herpes, genital warts, and HIV. In fact, research indicates 1 in 5 people have an STD, so chances of getting an STD from someone is very high. Many STDs have life-long consequences, and some can lead to cancer.

Emotional

Having sex is a very intimate and emotional experience bonding you to the other person. Again, within loving marriage relationship, sexual intimacy breeds trust, acceptance, and love all leading to healthy emotions of strong self-worth and confidence. Recreational sex can leave you feeling empty and hurt as you physically bond with someone in a deep way and then they leave. It can leave you feeling worthless and sad. You can protect your heart by saving sex for the one you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

Spiritual

Sex is a very natural part of life. It is what allows all living beings to continue for generations. The desire for sex is created within us by our creator and is tridimensional…body, mind, and spirit. When sex is experienced within the context of marriage, it connects our soul to another person in a unique and beautiful way.

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You aren't alone.

Check out these stories of hope from others who have struggled with this issue.

Let’s Talk About It

Were you raised in a home or church where talking about sex was taboo? Sometimes these protective rules and expectations of perfect sexual purity can keep you from talking with others about your struggles. However, without someone to talk to, you may feel alone and full of shame. And that’s a bad cycle to be stuck in.

The truth is, asking questions (even when they feel uncomfortable) is healthy and normal. And it’s often the first step toward the answers you’ve been longing for.

What should I do if I am being pressured to have sex?

How do I break my addiction to pornography?

How do I cope with the sexual abuse in my past?

How do I protect myself from sexual assault?
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Judgment-Free Help and Support

It can feel impossible to open up about intimate areas of our lives, especially if we’ve heard things like:

“What were you doing or wearing that caused that to happen?”

“Why did you let that happen?”

“That’s a major sin. The damage has been done and you can’t take it back.”

You are not damaged goods. You are still “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). And you can find freedom and healing from past sexual hurts and mistakes.

SPIRITUAL PRACTICE

God created sex to be enjoyed between a husband and a wife. It says in the Bible, a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24) However, if you are experiencing guilt or shame from a past sexual relationship, know that God still loves you and wants to remove your shame. Pray for forgiveness and accept God’s grace and love. The Bible promises that those who seek God will have no shame, “I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.” (Psalm 34:4-5)

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