TheHopeLine

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She had a Plan for Suicide – EP 27

She Doesn’t Have Anything Going in Her Life

She Has Been Thinking About Suicide

She has a plan to drive her car off of a really high bridge. It’s always serious when someone says, “I’m suicidal,” and I take it as very serious. If they have a plan, it’s serious on steroids. I asked Britney why she wants to. She said, “Because I don’t feel like I have anything going in my life. My life has revolved around taking care of my family and friends.”

Driving off the bridge is not the answer. Suicide is way too medicine for the sickness. Last weekend, her mom overdosed on her pills and she wasn’t sure if it was an accident or not. Britney constantly worries about her mom. Britney was put in foster care growing up and also had to take care of her grandmother, who had cancer.  She wonders, “What’s the point?”

She no doubt was asked to do something she was way too young for – something that was too demanding for her age and emotional needs.  Here she was, a foster child (which has its own issues), taking care of her dying grandmother.  It was all too much for her.

She sounds emotionally exhausted.  She didn’t say it, but her mother’s overdose probably makes her wonder if she’s going to have to go through the hurt again of taking care of someone who is dying, and who will leave her.  As the old song goes, “Alone Again, Naturally.”

Peer to Peer: Messages of Hope for Britney 

As I talked with Britney on my show, I realized that some of the most invaluable advice and encouragement could come from others who had been in her shoes. She needed some real uplifting and as we opened up the phone lines asking for people to give her message of hope…the calls came flooding in. Here are a few of those calls, from Katelyn, Brad, Caleb, and Lauren. These people were right on with their messages of hope and their encouragement!

Keep Going, Suicide Is Not the Answer

Katelyn says to Britney, “Keep going, suicide is not the answer. I’ve been in your shoes to the point where I didn’t want to be there anymore. And you just need to pray, be strong, and hold your head up. Even though you’re going through a rough patch right now, just know that God is handling it. God is watching over you. Look up to Him and pray to God. You are a strong beautiful person. There is no reason you should end your life because God has a plan for you.”

Katelyn gave Britney Firsthand Experience

Katelyn was kind but direct.  She spoke of firsthand experience.  She, too, had thought about killing herself.  People who have been suicidal and have come through the other side can be extremely helpful.

Some people are afraid to talk with a suicidal person about their issues, thinking about what they say will push them off the ledge, but that’s not true.  Talking with someone openly about suicide can only help, as long as it is respectful, kind, and without any baiting.  For example, “You’ll never kill yourself.  You’re too stupid to do it.”  That’s baiting.  And it’s very dangerous.  But Katelyn didn’t do that.  She spoke openly about the issues and was extremely respectful.

Katelyn was also hopeful.  And her hopefulness had been impacted by her faith in God.  When you bring God into the equation, you also bring hope because whatever is troubling someone who is suicidal can be solved by God.

You are Worth More than Driving Your Car off a Bridge

Here’s Brad’s advice for Britney. “I’ve been in your shoes before, I know exactly what you’re going through. I have felt the world against my shoulders, felt the world was crashing down around me and there was nowhere to turn…except to end it all. I had a plan myself. I started to do the plan and then one of my friends called me. I just happened to pick up, completely in tears, completely upset, feeling I wasn’t loved, that there was no there just to say, “Hey, I got you. I got your back. I’m always here if you need something.” It’s all sort of unexplained mysterious work at hand just to let you know that you are worth more than driving your car off a bridge. Your self-worth and the worth of everybody around you and around the world that’s listening right now. The fact the whole world is blowing up to let you know, girl, you got this. You can beat this, you are loved by millions of people. You’ve called in to talk with Dawson, you’ve called in and are listening to all of us. Just to talk to you and we are here to say we know where you are coming from. I get it. I understand. I’m here if you need me. I’m here if you need anything at all.”

Brad’s Advice offered Hope

Brad, too, offered tremendous hope to Britney.  He said the very fact that she had called the show was a sign of hope.  He’s right.  Some people are so depressed they don’t have the emotional strength to call.  She did.  She was serious, and she was getting the answers she was looking for.

He also talked about the millions of people who were hearing her plea for help.  And those million were all pulling for her. Always remember what people want most is hope.  If you will sincerely offer it to them, you are giving them an amazing gift.

You are Here for a Reason

Caleb said to Britney, “You called Dawson for a reason. God sent you to Dawson for a reason, so you could call him. That way God can speak to you through someone else to help you not do what you are trying to do right now. There have been many people in your shoes. I have been in your shoes just recently. I wanted to drive my car at 110 mph into a tree. But Dawson came on and spoke words to me that I’ve never heard before and I listened to his show for 8 years. I had friend’s blowing up my phone, they all tell me there’s a reason I’m here. God didn’t put you down here for no reason. Nobody is down here on this Earth for no reason. We all make a difference, whether it be now, in the past, or in the future. You could wake up tomorrow and then something new sparks up and you’ve just changed the whole world. You never know.”

Caleb said Something Powerful

Caleb had something really powerful to say – he said, “You’re not down here for no reason.”  He was saying don’t blow the opportunity God has given you.  It may be dark today, but that could all change tomorrow.

There’s so Much You Haven’t Experienced Yet

Lauren says to Britney, “Life gets really really hard sometimes and it feels like you’re at your breaking point. I suffer with depression. I’ve been through a lot of things and been suicidal.  You’re so young and there’s so much you haven’t experienced. There’s so much in the world to see. And you’re worth so much more than driving your car off a bridge.”

You are worth so much more!

Lauren, another caller, piggy-backed on what Caleb was saying.  She said, “You’re so young, and there’s so much in the world you haven’t experienced, and there’s so much in the world to see.  And you’re worth so much more than driving your car off a bridge.” Amen Lauren!

What advice would you give Britney?

Britney said the advice was amazing! After hearing the messages of hope, she said, “I’m not going to give up!” If you have advice for Britney, would you type it in the comments below! You never know when Britney or someone else struggling with suicidal thoughts might read it, be encouraged and find hope.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Have you been having thoughts of suicide or know someone who’s there right now? It’s incredible, the difference we can make in someone’s life by speaking love and encouragement to them. What I loved about each of those that gave messages of hope for Britney, was that is they could relate to what she was feeling. Each one of them had felt like giving up at some point in their life. They told Britney, they’d been there, feeling like she does, and she didn’t have to be in that place alone.

I love what Caleb told Britney, “God didn’t put you down here for no reason.” God has an amazing plan for each one of us. Psalm 139:13-16 says, “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.  My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.”

Let God be your hope. He alone is our hope and our refuge. As the Psalmist David wrote, “We put our hope in the Lord. He is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. Let your unfailing love surround us, Lord, for our hope is in you alone.” (Psalm 33:20-22)

Resources for help with Suicide:

If you or a friend need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, for free confidential, 24/7 help. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope! 

Dawson

Are You Depressed and Emotionally Exhausted? – EP 26

There Is Hope for Depression

Overwhelmed and Depressed 

Have you noticed there are many people who struggle with deep emotional issues? They are often sad and miserable and can stay that way for months, even years. These people are depressed. Depression is described as a prolonged unexplained sadness which affects everyday life.

If you are depressed, you may feel trapped beneath emotions of overwhelming sadness and hopelessness. Maybe you lack the motivation, energy, and strength to face life’s many challenges. The good news is there are many people who have won this debilitating emotional battle.

Join me as I talk with Samantha, Melissa, and Cody each who are in some way seeking to cope with their depression. I’ll also speak with Dustin who is creatively reaching out to people he knows are depressed.

Are you depressed and emotionally exhausted? There is hope. @DawsonRadio #depression Click To Tweet

Emotionally Exhausted 

Samantha is 17 and just transferred to a new school. She knows a few people but can’t play sports and feels she can’t be herself. She just reunited with her real dad and her step-father doesn’t know.

Most who are depressed are carrying too heavy of a load and over time become increasingly drained and weary. Because they are downhearted, it is difficult for them to identify what’s depleting their emotions. It’s like their emotional batteries are slowly but surely being drained.

Samantha has big issues draining life from her. She needs to identify and prioritize big things that are pulling her down. For example,

  • She transferred to a new high school. That would be a big adjustment for anyone, let alone someone at 17 and in their senior year.
  • She loves sports but can’t play them this year because she changed schools.
  • Changing schools would be more than enough but there’s more going on in her life. She just reunited with her birth dad and her step-father doesn’t know a thing about it.
  • To make matters more complicated, she doesn’t get along with her step-father. In fact, they hardly ever speak.
  • She feels it’s her against the whole family.

Samantha has been hit with a double whammy, a lot of stress at her new school, and family pressures at home. No one should have to face that kind of exhausting stress. Is it any wonder she’s depressed? Samantha needs to turn to God like she never has before. Only He can give her the energy she needs to face her challenges. My prayer for her is as she reaches out for help, God will replenish all she has lost and more. He said in Jeremiah 31:25: “For I will refresh the weary soul and replenish all who are weak.”

Depression Setbacks, Don’t Give Up

Melissa’s been dealing with depression for about 7 to 8 years now. She was getting better but now is going downhill, since her therapist was murdered.

In any situation, where a person needs to change, there will be setbacks and even major roadblocks. In Melissa’s case, she was starting to make progress. Her counselor was truly helping her but then shockingly, was murdered. Now, Melissa wants to give up and throw the progress she has made away. Melissa should ask herself what would her therapist, if he were alive today, advise her to do? No doubt would say, “Hang in there, don’t give up. If you were making progress before, you can make it again.”

It’s God, who can reach down in Melissa’s life and give her the strength to seek help once again. The Bible says, “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.” Psalm 30:5b My prayer for Melissa is although there have been tears, even weeping, joy will come into her life, the kind of joy only God can give.

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. #Psalm30 #NeverGiveUp Click To Tweet

Worthless, Rejected and Depressed

Cody says he does alright fighting the depression back for a little while, but it always comes back. He’s felt a lot of rejection in his life.  He first was rejected when he was 8 and his mom left him with his aunt. He doesn’t want to keep fighting and keep trying to prove he’s worth something to somebody. He’s tried to kill himself before, but his sister kept him from it 2 or 3 times.

As in Cody’s case, sometimes you get to the point, where you just have to hang on. You tell yourself, I’m not going to quit, no matter how hard it is.

Cody needs to give himself a break. He has a core belief that he’s worthless. He’s been blaming himself for this depression since he was a child. His mother, in her own dysfunction, helped drive that lies deeper into Cody’s heart by abandoning him when he was but 8 years old.

Feels Like He Doesn’t Belong 

Now, after all this time, Cody feels like he doesn’t belong anywhere. Add to that heartbreaking issue, Cody also has financial problems which seem more than he can bear. He feels like a broken man and will need every bit of courage to overcome what has been pounded into him.

He already tried to kill himself and has thought about it a lot. Suicide is not the answer. Instead, may he find the victory over the dark clouds and may God touch his life and heal him.

King David cried out to God at moments of despair. He said, “Save me, O God, for the waters have come up to my neck. I sink in the miry depths, where there is no foothold. I have come into the deep waters; the floods engulf me. I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched. My eyes fail, looking for my God.” (Psalm 69:1-3) “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm 42:5)

There is hope! If you are depressed, there are people God has put around you who will help you!

There is hope! If you are depressed, there are people God has put around you who will help you! Click To Tweet

Letters Helped Others with Depression

I got the chance to talk to an amazing, inspirational guy, Dustin. Dustin’s friend lost her brother in a car accident, so Dustin wrote her what he calls, “feel better” letters. When she got depressed, she could read one of the letters and feel better. Dustin has now written over 100 encouragement letters for others dealing with depression.

Dustin has his own struggles. He’s been homebound for 6 years because he has Ehlers–Danlos Syndrome where the collagen breaks down in the body and the joints won’t hold together anymore. Instead of being bitter towards God about his own struggles, he’s reaching out to others. What a powerful example he is. People who are depressed and reach out to help others find a whole new energy.

Did Today’s Episode on Depression Get You Thinking?

Jesus Christ said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:28)

I have to say it again. If you are depressed, there is hope!!! God is near to those who are crushed in spirit. He wants to heal your emotions. God wants to help you and He has put people around you to help you. Ask the Lord for help and strength and then look around and see who God has put in your life to help you. Also, check out our many resources for help with depression.

Resources for Help with Depression:

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

How to Deal with Verbally Abusive Parents: EP 25

Are You Trapped in a Cycle of Emotional Abuse from Parents?

Overwhelmed by the Verbal Abuse

The words of an abuser can cause all kinds of agony and can set one on a lifelong destructive course. In this episode, I speak with Lance, who’s verbally attacked by his parents. I also talk with Sarah who endures verbal abuse at least twice a day trapped in the car with her dad. And the most difficult conversation I had is with Tameka, whose father emotionally and verbally abuses her. He calls her names and puts her down every day. If you need help dealing with verbal abuse in your family, then this one is for you!

Trying to Avoid the Conflict with Parents

Lance’s parents get angry at him for stupid reasons. They call him names and he says, “It’s getting stupid.” Lance gets so stressed by his parent’s abuse, he forgets his responsibilities and messes up even more.

Like Lance, most victims of verbal abuse feel put down, afraid, hurt, angry, confused, and helpless to do anything about the situation. In this case, Lance tried to get away from the abuse by hiding in his room, trying to avoid the conflict.

The words of an abuser cause all kinds of agony. It can set one on a lifelong destructive course. The Bible does not mince words when talking about a destructive tongue. It says, “The tongue is a fire. It is full of wrong. It poisons the whole body. The tongue sets our whole lives on fire with a fire that comes from hell.” James 3:6 In spite of this graphic description, the verbal abuser seldom understands or cares about the havoc he or she is causing. Most are full of rage and have no idea the damage being done.

The words of an abuser cause all kinds of agony. It can set one on a lifelong destructive course. Click To Tweet

Lance is afraid of his parents. They use vicious words to control and hurt him. Lance is stressed at what his parents are doing which causes him to forget what they are trying to say. It’s a vicious cycle. They verbally abuse him, he stresses out and forgets what they require of him, so they abuse him more. Then he forgets again, they get angrier and lash out.

Minimizing the Emotional Abuse

On one hand, Lance understands they hurt him, on the other hand he minimizes what they are doing to him. I challenged him to get out of the house and he responded by saying, “Their good parents besides that.” Just because they are good parents the rest of the time, doesn’t change the fact that their verbal abuse is horrific and causing incredible damage. It’s like someone who has been beaten within an inch of death to say of his attacker, “It’s okay that he almost killed me because most of the time he’s really nice.”

Lance doesn’t have an advocate or someone to help him with his problems. His abusive parents have beaten him down and he doesn’t know what to do but just knowing someone cares will help him tremendously with his tragic situation.

A Father Full of Rage and Verbal Abuse

Sarah is in a very difficult situation. She and her sister are in the car, with their father for 10 minutes, twice a day, to and from school. Their father is extremely angry. He’s full of rage because of the divorce and who knows what else. Attacking the girls verbally is irrational but in some ways it must make him feel better, even though he’s doing great harm to his victims.

The wise King Solomon has given incredible advice to someone who is forced to be around another one full of rage. Solomon’s advice is to go soft and quiet when an angry person acts out. He said in Proverbs 15:1, “A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.”

When Sarah becomes gentle and humble with her words, she can help soften her father’s harsh and angry words by not letting him get her upset. After a while, the father will run out of things to say. He will see love and wisdom demonstrated during their drives to and from school. God’s love is powerful. It can do some amazing things, even turn Sarah’s father into a changed man.

We all ought to pray for Sarah because she needs tremendous patience. With it her soft approach will help change her father’s attitude. Solomon wrote, “Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.” Proverbs 25:15

“A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” Proverbs 15:1 Click To Tweet

Stuck in an Awful Predicament of Abuse

Tameka’s father has been emotionally and verbally abusing her for 6 years. He calls her names and puts her down every day. Tameka feels she can’t take it anymore and is starting to break down.

Tameka is stuck and needs help to find a much better situation. She needs to get away from her abusive father. The Bible tells us about King Saul, who was David’s mentor but also his authority figure. Saul had the right to put David to death and anyone else under his dominion. Saul fell away from God and was determined to kill David because he was jealous and hateful towards him.

David had to go to someone who could protect him and that someone was a man called Samuel. Samuel was a powerful man. He was both a prophet and judge over all of Israel. The Bible goes onto to say, “When David had fled and made his escape, he went to Samuel at Ramah and told him all that Saul had done to him. Then he and Samuel went to Naioth and stayed there.” 1 Samuel 19:18

Tameka, like David, is under the authority of her father. Before attempting to leave her horribly abusive situation, she needs to hook up with safe people who will protect her. She definitely needs our prayers for strength and courage as she reaches out to others.

Let us all pray, God will change Tameka’s father, so he will turn from his vicious ways. The Bible says, “A worthless man digs up evil, and his speech is like a scorching fire.” Proverbs 16:27 May God stop him in his tracks, may he turn to Christ to forgive him and find a whole new life of love and support.

Did Today’s Episode on Abuse Get You Thinking?

Verbally abused people are all around us. May God help us identify them and offer support that will help them heal. If you have been verbally abused, I want to encourage you to go to a place called ThePrayerZone.com. There you will find encouragement and prayer that will start you down the road of healing. Our hearts are with you. God says, “He will respond to the prayer of the destitute; he will not despise their plea.” Psalm 102:17

Verbally abused people are all around us. May God help us identify them and offer support to help them heal. Click To Tweet

Resources for help with EMOTIONAL and VERBAL Abuse:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on depression. In this episode, I speak with Samantha who finds herself emotionally exhausted. I also get a chance to talk with Melissa, facing a serious setback after her counselor is murdered. Then, I realize that Cody has a core belief, he’s worthless. Lastly, Dustin shares how even though he’s got some debilitating health issues, he’s reaching out to people who are depressed and encouraging them. From this episode, I hope you gain encouragement and are able to get help by learning from other’s experiences.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

The Overwhelming Feeling of Loneliness: EP 24

What Keeps You from Meaningful Relationships?

Feeling Alone can be Overwhelming

Loneliness can lead to a lot of other issues; such as, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and even thoughts of suicide. If you’ve been feeling lonely, know it’s not God’s plan for your life. He wants us to have friends and to love each other as He loves us. In this episode, I talk about loneliness with Amy, Tim, and Rebecca. We’ll talk about what keeps them from having meaningful relationships and how they can find and build friendships.

Girls Don’t Seem to Like Her

Amy wishes she had girlfriends to go out and have fun with. When she’s not with her boyfriend, she’s at home by herself. She says, girls don’t seem to like her. Amy is asking the question, why? Why does she lack meaningful relationships, especially with other girls?

It’s a challenge to maintain long-term relationships. We live hurried, busy lives and don’t always take the time to develop them. We get prideful and don’t want to appear like we need others. Sometimes we don’t know how to find and keep deeper relationships. Or it’s easy to take offense or decide we are better off without people in our lives.

Afraid to Reach Out

Many times, when we ask, why am I lonely? We already know what the answer is. The challenge is it’s too emotionally risky to solve the problem. Most people know what to do, they just don’t know how to do it or they are not willing to pay the price to remedy the problem. What are some reasons people are afraid to reach out?

  • Pride – Amy doesn’t want to look like she’s trying too hard to make friends.
  • Fear of rejection – you have to put yourself out there and you don’t know how the other person is going to respond.
  • Confused about how many friends you really need. Amy is thinking about a lot of friends but one friend at this point is really all she needs. Most people only have 2 or 3 really close friends anyway.
  • It’s hard when you’re lonely to think that other people around you are lonely too. Some camouflage their needs really well. It’s not like they have a sign on their forward that says, “Talk to me I’m lonely.”
  • Some people don’t understand there are sacrifices to developing new relationships. Amy may have to cut back on her time with her boyfriend to take the time to make friends with other girls. It’s worth it but it’s not easy.
Lonely? It’s not God’s plan for your life. He wants us to have friends & to love each other. Click To Tweet

Show Yourself Friendly

Amy needs to put aside her pride and be willing to make the first move toward gaining a friend. She needs to begin to show herself friendly. She can’t just wait for friends to come to her. This means she has to set aside time to get to know other people. She’s going to have to get out of her comfort zone and do activities with people other than her boyfriend. Amy has the tools to do this and with God’s help she can.

Grief and Loneliness 

Tim was an only child and both of his parents died. He said they were very poor but he never lacked for food or clothes, his parents took good care of him. It’s been 5 years since they died. Tim works in the oil field and makes good money but the girls he’s dated think he’s gullible and lonely.

Lonely people have often been struck with major hurts and tragedies. Sometimes through no fault of their own, the very people who would help fill the gap of aloneness are snatched from them. Grief and loneliness can come hand in hand.

Tim has really been through it…losing both parents can be devastating. Ye he’s the only one who can make the changes in his life that will help develop deep, important, and potentially long-term relationships with others.

Tim, however is constantly reminded he’s all alone. He’s had shallow relationships with girls who don’t care about him. At the same time, he’s observing others who are enjoying the good family life. So, what hope does Tim have?

Lonely people have often been struck with major hurts and tragedies through no fault of their own. Click To Tweet

God’s Help for Loneliness

He needs to remind himself how God helped him when he was very young. The same hope he had as a child when God put the food on the table from a very poor family is still available to him now. That same God who helped him back then, can and will help him again with his fears and loneliness. King David wrote, “The steps of a man are ordered by the LORD, and He delights in his way. Though he falls, he will not be overwhelmed, for the LORD is holding his hand. I once was young and now am old, yet never have I seen the righteous abandoned or their children begging for bread.” Psalm 37:23-25

The good news for Tim is he already has a relationship with God. He speaks of God’s provisions but it’s hard for him to apply that to his feelings of loneliness. As Dr. Billy Graham once said, “Nothing dissolves loneliness like a session with God’s Word.” Tim needs to seek the Lord with all of his heart and then friendships and relationships will fall into place. Jesus said, “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.” Matthew 6:33

Be a Good Friend

Rebecca is feeling lonely and wants more friends. She has 2 friends at school, but they are in different classes, so she doesn’t see them much.

Rebecca needs to understand this is not a little thing we are talking about. God’s will is for her to have friends. If God wants us to have friends, then he will make the way for us to find them. The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12:

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

God’s going to help Rebecca. Part of His plan is found in Proverbs 18:24, “A man that has friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.” As I mentioned to Rebecca, if she is a good friend and shows others she’s approachable, then people will want to be around her.

Shared Experiences

One key to making friends is shared experiences. This is why teammates can become so close as well as roommates, coworkers, and people into the same interests. They share experiences together and get to know each other while doing similar activities.

Rebecca needs to find a group to join; whether it’s a club, team, community service group, study group, or youth group. This way she can get to know people through shared experiences. Meaningful relationships do not develop overnight. They take time and must be cultivated.

Meaningful #relationships do not develop overnight. They take time and must be cultivated. Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

God does not want us to go through struggles alone. He wants us to have friends, who will stick with us through thick or thin. Proverbs 12:12 says, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”

A friend can make all the difference in your life whether you are going through a really hard time or you are doing well. A true friend, as the Bible says, can stick closer to you than a sister or brother.

My prayer for you is that you will find the right kind of friends and they will help you and you will help them and you will have a much richer life. God bless you as you seek to find those friends.

Resources for help with LONELINESS:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on verbal abuse in the family. The words of an abuser can cause all kinds of agony and can set one on a lifelong destructive course. In this episode, I speak with Lance, who’s verbally attacked by his parents. I also talk with Sarah who endures verbal abuse at least twice a day trapped in the car with her dad. And the most difficult conversation I had is with Tameka, whose father emotionally and verbally abuses her. He calls her names and puts her down every day. If you need help dealing with verbal abuse in your family, then this one is for you!

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

How to Deal with Anger: EP 23

Emotional Stuffing, Misplaced Anger, and Rage

In This Episode:

I’m glad you are listening to this podcast dealing with anger. Everybody struggles with it: you, me and the guy down the street. That’s why God speaks about it so much in the Bible. I had a chance to talk with 3 people: Evie, Donald and Matthew about their anger. I think you will be moved by their honesty but also the serious traps they could fall into if they don’t deal with it.

Built Up Resentments

Evie’s mom is a quadriplegic from a car accident that happened when Evie was 4 years old. Evie hasn’t had much of a childhood and has a lot of built up resentments. Evie’s been forced to take care of her mom practically her whole life and is constantly reminded of her very difficult predicament. She feels alone and isolated. She feels her situation is keeping her in bondage, with no freedom in sight.  So, to make up for the pain and her sense of powerlessness, she’s turned to anger. Her plan has been to take her anger out on herself and others. That’s called misplaced anger. But that does not work. It fails her every time and leaves her sad and even more frustrated.

Find the Positive to Deal

Evie, however, is doing some positive things to help her cope. She writes music, poetry and spends time in nature. She’s trying to deal with her issues in a healthy way but in the end, her coping mechanisms are not enough. She needs to understand what she’s going through from a whole different perspective.

King David suffered from many heartaches; like abandonment, loneliness and other deep emotional issues. Yet, he kept his faith in God. David let God help him change the way he viewed his life. David was able to turn from feeling sad to glad by praising God for what He had done. David said in Palms 40:3, “He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the LORD.”

There is no way Evie can get over her anger without God. She needs something miraculous to happen. With God’s help, she can transform the way she looks at her life. She can turn from anger and resentment to praise and hope.

With God’s help you can turn from anger and resentment to praise and hope. @dawsonradio #anger Click To Tweet

Taking Anger Out on Everybody Else

Donald is having anger problems. His friends can be joking, and he can get angry one minute and then be happy the next. Donald said, “When my temper flares up, I lose what I’m doing and start taking my anger out on everybody else.” I encouraged Donald to visit a doctor to see if he needs medication. Seeking professional opinions can help and it doesn’t mean we are a failure. Seeing a psychiatrist is not a death sentence. They have been able to help millions of people get relief.

Part of the reason, Donald is struggling is because he’s an emotional stuffer. Instead of releasing how he feels in a positive way, he buries them. Therefore, the emotions have no place to go. Stuffing them can cause him to carry around emotional explosives which can be triggered by just about anything.

Find a Trusted Person to Talk to

Donald needs to find ways to express his feelings in a positive way. One way is to talk out how he’s feeling and not just act like everything is okay. He needs to find someone…a friend, a minister, a counselor, a trusted family member to talk things out. He also needs to discuss issues he has with others as they happen and not wait until he can’t handle the emotions anymore. For example, if someone close to him hurts him, he needs to go to them and discuss how he’s feeling instead of ignoring it.

The Bible tells us to not let the sun go down on our anger. We need to quickly stop from being angry so that we don’t let anger control our lives. As you read the Bible, you will find strength and encouragement and it can be a powerful outlet to your deep emotions. The Bible has a lot to say about anger and the emotions that feed it. King David wrote, “Refrain from anger and abandon wrath; do not fret–it can only bring harm.” Psalm 37:8

Remember God wants to turn our anger and fretting into peace and love! The choice is ours!

Seeing a psychiatrist is not a death sentence. They have helped millions of people get relief. Click To Tweet

Afraid to Get Out of Control

Matthew gets irritated and frustrated over little things. He says in the past, he’s gotten out of control and he’s afraid he might be getting to that point again. For example, wanting to throw the coffee table across the room.

Matthew has developed good insights into himself. He can see he has used anger to make up for the powerlessness he feels. Anger has become his protector but has its disastrous results. He wants to stop his anger from getting out of control. He understood what I was saying, “If you don’t do something about it, it will do something about you.” Anger is like a bad habit, it just grows and grows until disaster strikes.

Find a Place to Get Help

Part of his problem is he doesn’t know where to go to get help. He will have to be proactive to find the help he needs. He needs counseling which can help him discover the roots of his anger. He needs a whole support team around him to help him when he feels that rage. Church can be a great place to find help and a support team. He’ll have to be persistent to find a church which will help him. He needs to know, God will help him in getting down the road to freedom from anger and rage. The Bible says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” Ephesians 4:31

Anger is like a bad habit, it just grows and grows until disaster strikes. @DawsonRadio Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Perhaps, this episode has caused you to examine your own anger. If that is true, may I suggest a simple prayer that could change your anger problems in amazing ways.

Dear God, I submit myself to you. I don’t want to be an angry person. Help me so I don’t let the sun go down on my anger. I want peace and calm in place of anger. Help me to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. I trust you to help me with this issue in my life. Thank you that you are going to change me into a whole new person as I seek and obey you! Amen.

May God give you the courage and love that we all need to face anger and other hurtful emotions. It can be a long journey but one we must take. God bless you!

Resources for help with ANGER:

May God give you courage and love to face #anger and other #hurtful emotions. @DawsonRadio Click To Tweet

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on loneliness. Feeling alone can be overwhelming. It can lead to a lot of other issues; such as, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and even thoughts of suicide. If you’ve been feeling lonely, know it’s not God’s plan for your life. He wants us to have friends and to love each other as He loves us. In this episode, I talk about loneliness with Amy, Tim, and Rebecca. We’ll talk about what keeps them from having meaningful relationships and how they can find and build friendships.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

 

Relationship Disasters – What Not to Do: EP 22

Questions to Ask Before Starting to Date

In This Episode:

Even before you begin to date, there are some questions you need to ask yourself and then answer which could save you from a lot of pain, heartache and relationship disasters. In this episode, I talk with Dustin about his unrealistic expectations with dating. Then I talk with Blake, who jumped into dating and a physical relationship way too quickly. Lastly, Jessica and I have a conversation about her dating over 150 guys in one year and how she’s needs to ask herself, “Have I become obsessive and out of control in my search to find the right one?”

Unrealistic Expectations

Dustin met a girl on a dating website. Dustin soon realized he has too much going on to date a girl who lives 2 hours away. Plus, he’s not attracted to her but he’s still dating her.

In my conversation with Dustin, it became clear he had unrealistic expectations about what dating could do for him.

  • Dustin should have asked himself am I genuinely attracted to this girl or am I settling for less, just so I can be in a relationship?

If you are dating and realize this person is not the one you want to keep dating then don’t drag it out. Sometimes we attempt to keep the relationship going when we should have ended it. Dustin went into the relationship with high expectations, even though she didn’t meet them, he kept dating her anyway. What a mistake! Dustin is settling for a girl he’s not attracted to, just to be in a relationship.

  • Dustin should also have asked himself, “Do I have enough time and emotional energy to give to the relationship?”

Dustin isn’t in a good place to start a relationship. Why is he even looking for someone right now? He has too much on his plate already. It should be a clue he’s not ready to seriously date. Successful dating relationships take time and can’t be pushed, manipulated, or made into something it’s not. Dustin was trying to force a relationship with her even though she wasn’t the right girl and it wasn’t the right time.

  • Dustin should have asked himself a very direct question: “Am I looking to this girl to make me feel complete?”

Spiritual and Emotional Completeness

No woman is going to make Dustin feel whole for very long. A true spiritual and emotional completeness comes only from a deep relationship with Jesus Christ. His love never fails us. His wisdom is beyond our wildest imagination. His plans for us are always the best. King David, a great king in the Bible said, “Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you your heart’s desires. Commit everything you do to the LORD. Trust him, and he will help you.” Psalm 7: 4-5

God knows our desires and knows what we need, who else can helps us like God? We are easily fooled but God is never. If we seek Him with all of our heart, all our other desires will take care of themselves.

If the person is not the ONE you want to keep dating then don’t drag it out. #relationships Click To Tweet

Jumped into Dating Way Too Quickly

Blake and his girlfriend jumped into dating way too quickly. It became physical even though neither of them intended it to be.

  • Blake should have asked himself, “Is this relationship spinning out of control?”

Don’t let the powerful feelings of false intimacy, stirred up by the misuse of sex, fool you into thinking you have an awesome relationship. In reality, you don’t! It’s just a matter of time until the whole thing will fall apart. That’s what happened to Blake. They weren’t even friends and didn’t know how to fix it. Sex was a cloud over their relationship that kept it from growing and led it to be out of control. Don’t let that happen to you!

Don’t let false intimacy, stirred up by sex, fool you into thinking you have a great relationship. Click To Tweet

Epitome of a Relationship Disaster

Jessica blew my mind. Here is a young woman who has dated over 150 guys in one year. She said she’s the epitome of a relationship disaster.

  • Jessica needed to ask herself, “Have I become obsessive and out of control in my search to find the right one?”

She has developed a full-blown addiction to guys. She keeps going with a different guy nearly every night but it doesn’t work. She always comes up empty and yet craving for more. She’s turned guys into a god. There’s no way these guys could ever meet her needs. She’s looking to them to do for her what only God can do.

Carousel of Heartbreak

Don’t ever let someone you are dating turn into a god. Only God can be God. Only God can fill your emptiness. One could date a million guys, still come up empty and still trapped on a carousel of heartbreak. Only Jesus Christ can rescue Jessica from the blinding, cruel carousel. The last thing she needs to do is go after one more guy. She needs a whole new personal healing. She needs to put first things first and get her life out of reverse. Jesus said, “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matthew 6:33

Don’t let who you're dating turn into a god. Only God can be God. Only God can fill your emptiness. Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

My hope is you will continually ask yourself important questions and be honest with the answers. Be very careful before starting to date because you could end up with scars God never intended you to have. With God’s help, you can develop a healthy, happy dating experience and that is my hope for you.

Resources for Relationships:

  • Check out these stories of hope from people who have struggled in their relationship: Relationship Issues, and My Relationship, Depression and Then Hope
  • Need to talk about your issues? Sign up for an Email Mentor, an online coach who will email you and come along beside you to offer support.
  • Need prayer? I believe God wants to change your life and mine, through prayer. If you need prayer and would like to have someone pray for you, go to the ThePrayerZone.com and check it out.
With God’s help, you can develop a healthy, happy dating experience. @dawsonradio #RelationshipGoals Click To Tweet

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on how to deal with anger. Everybody struggles with it, you, me and the guy down the street and that’s why God speaks about it so much in the Bible. I had a chance to talk with 3 people: Evie, Donald and Matthew about their anger. I think you will be moved by their honesty but also the serious traps they could fall into if they don’t deal with it.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

 

Is Your Toxic Relationship Sucking the Life out of You? EP 21

Above All Else, Guard Your Heart…

In This Episode:

Do you have a relationship sucking the life and energy from you? Maybe you don’t even realize your relationship is dragging you down. If it’s poisoning your self-esteem and happiness then chances are it’s extremely toxic, which means…time to get out! In this episode, I talk with Ashely about all the toxic, hurtful things her messed up boyfriend does to her. Then I talk with Kelsea, who’s boyfriend is sucking the life out of her causing her to be confused and miserable. Lastly, I talk with Jess. He and his girlfriend keep going back to the destructive parts of their relationship causing confusion, hurt and chaos in their relationship.

Hurt Repeatedly

Ashley’s messed up boyfriend has hurt her repeatedly. He’s done many terrible things, including:

  • Bringing way too much drama to the relationship
  • Stolen money from Ashley
  • Left her all alone
  • Lied to her countless times
  • Doesn’t take responsibility for his children
  • Repeatedly breaks his promises

He’s also a player, a user, an abuser and is a guy lacking a conscience. As you can tell, there is no question, Ashley is in a toxic relationship. The longer she stays in it, the more difficult it will be for her to end it.

The good news is Ashley has friends who will support her. She’s not alone. God is with her to help her do what she must do. As scary as it is, Ashley should have a restraining order put on him, and break off all contact, even if it means she must move away. But as long as she gives him hope, he’ll hang around, trying all of his tricks again and again. Ashley needs to cut off all ties with him, no matter what.

Is your relationship sucking the life and energy out of you? #realtionships Click To Tweet

Confused and Miserable

Kelsea’s been dating a guy for 2 years. He’s caused Kelsea to be confused and miserable because:

  • He like many other toxic people have trust issues.
  • He is talking to another girl. He even goes to this girl’s apartment alone. He’s told this other girl he has feelings for her, and sends her inappropriate texts and pictures.
  • He lies to Kelsea repeatedly.
  • He brings a lot of terrible drama to her life. She finds herself sitting in the counselor’s office at school, crying her eyes out.

It’s all so sad! Kelsea’s boyfriend is toxic and he’s sucking the life right out of her, causing her to be miserable, and confused. So, even though Kelsea is beginning to recognize the cruel things he has done to her, she feels he still loves her. Why would she believe that? No one else does. Everybody else knows he’s a loser but she keeps telling herself lies about him. She fears if she ever faces the truth, she would have to leave him and to her that would be the ultimate heartbreak. She would rather have a crushing, toxic relationship than no relationship at all.

Would you rather have a crushing, toxic relationship than no relationship at all? @dawsonradio Click To Tweet

It Takes Courage to Leave a Toxic Relationship

Sometimes when people are single, they feel like they’ve failed. But really, they are just without a boyfriend or girlfriend at the time. It’s not forever. They tie their self-worth to if they have a relationship with someone. Their whole self-esteem cries out, “Better to be in a toxic relationship than be single.” That, of course, is a lie.

It takes far more courage to leave a toxic relationship and be single and healthy than to stay in the toxic relationship. There will always be people to date but the question is, who is this person? Am I growing when I’m with them? Am I just going to plow into another relationship unprotected and clamoring to meet needs the other person can’t meet?

It takes courage to leave a toxic #relationship and be single and healthy than to stay. @dawsonradio Click To Tweet

Mixed Signals and Obsession

Jess and his girlfriend have drama and chaos in their relationship. They are sleeping together causing confusion and hurt. They find themselves going back to the destructive part of their relationship.

His girlfriend’s hurting him by acting like she loves him again and then breaks it off. This is not healthy. There’s too much confusion with her mixed signals and his obsession to be with her. Their relationship is toxic.

If you don’t break off a toxic relationship, you are feeding it, making matters worse.  Toxic relationships never die on their own. Someone has to put an end to the whole thing and that’s never easy. But in the future, you’ll be able to look back and say why did it take so long for me to end it?

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

The Bible commands we are to guard our hearts but few people really do. Most don’t stop to ask the hard questions or show a willingness to even consider who the other person is, or whether or not they bring toxicity with them. People will always pay a price when they jump into a relationship without first committing to guard their heart.

The Bible in Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” God says for us to guard our hearts above all things. That means YOU need to guard your own heart, no one else will do it for you.

If you are in a toxic relationship, it’s not too late for you to start to guard your heart. It’s time to break off ties with someone who is only bringing you pain and heartache. Then ask God to heal your brokenness and commit to guarding your heart. Ask God for wisdom to do all of this. as Jesus said, “Be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.” Matthew 10:16.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. - Proverbs 4:23 Click To Tweet

Resources for Identifying a Toxic Relationship:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on questions you need to ask yourself before you start dating someone. Questions which could save you from a lot of pain and heartache. In this episode, I talk with Dustin about his unrealistic expectations with dating. Then I talk with Blake, who jumped into dating and a physical relationship way too quickly. Lastly, Jessica and I have a conversation about her dating over 150 guys in one year and how she’s needs to ask herself, “Have I become obsessive and out of control in my search to find the right one?”

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

 

How to Deal with Anxiety: EP 20

Anxiety Is Real and Can Be Overwhelming

In This Episode:

We all get nervous, worried, stressed, and fearful from time to time. For example, when speaking in public, going through a financial hardship, or when having trouble in a difficult relationship.

Anxiety is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about a looming event or something with an uncertain outcome. Having some anxiety is normal but for others, it becomes so frequent, and forceful, it takes over their lives and affects their ability to function. In this episode, I talk with Iva, Allison, and Matthew, each of them have had high levels of anxiety.

A Deep Plunge into Anxiety

Iva is dealing with an anxiety issue. He has no idea why he’s anxious. He’s taken a deep plunge into anxiety and feels there is no way out. He’ll be in class and for no apparent reason will start sweating, shaking and can’t breathe. Then has to lay down in the nurse’s office until he feels better. He doesn’t understand where the anxiety is coming from.

Iva is not alone, there are many people who have serious anxiety issues, 18% of all Americans suffer from anxiety. Many have no idea why they have such anxious feelings, which alone could make one feel even more turmoil. They usually don’t have much patience and understandably so. The anxiety can be so intense, they want relief and they want it now.

Any person who is struggling with anxiety, needs encouragement and support from others, who will empathize and pray with them as they face their daily battles. And walk with them through their own personal nightmares.

You are not alone. 18% of all Americans have an anxiety disorder. #anxiety Click To Tweet

God Can Give Us a Deep Sense of Peace

God can give us a deep sense of peace as we work through our issues. God says more than just, “Don’t be anxious,” or “Get over it,” but tells us our prayers and petitions are the keys to opening the door of overcoming our anxiety. The apostle Paul wrote,

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

I have high hopes for Iva, in spite of his struggle, he has not given up. His parents love him and support him, even though they don’t know what to do. Knowing they are there for him can be a great help. Truly Iva is tormented. May God show him the way to find the peace that passes all understanding.

Overloaded with Emotional Trauma

Allison has a lot of drama in her life, giving her tons of anxiety. She grew up in a dysfunctional family where her and her father were very close and her mom was jealous of their relationship. Now, her parents are getting divorced and Allison feels it’s her fault.

Allison is way overloaded with emotional trauma. For her to get help, she has to reach out and face the truth. Her anxiety attacks are a secondary issue, as horrendous as they are. They serve as a wakeup call. She must discover the triggers which cause her to spin into these anxiety nightmares.

Allison is coming to realize what some of these triggers are:

  • A broken relationship with her mom
  • A sense of false guilt and shame about her mom
  • Her dysfunction family
  • A boyfriend whose violated her trust
  • Way overloaded with her jobs
  • Her father being gone

She’s carrying too much weight, and she’s crying out for help. There’s only so much medication can do. It can help but it’s not an end-all. She’s going to have to go deeper and deal with her issues, one at a time. As she does that, the load will start to get lighter and she will experience less anxiety.

Go deeper to deal with issues, one at a time, and the load will start to get lighter. #anxiety Click To Tweet

Suffered from Anxiety Attacks

Matthew has suffered from anxiety attacks and even thought at one time he might die. He has no peace about anything. It took away all his energy. Then he discovered where to find strength and rest and he found them in Christ Jesus. He was worrying about everything and trying to carry everything on his shoulders. He’s learned to give it all over to God. From time to time, he still gets nervous but it’s been years since his last anxiety attack.

Finding Peace

Matthew has found his personal peace with Jesus Christ. With Christ’s love and power, he’s able to help others deal with their anxieties. He still struggles from time to time but nothing like it once was. Jesus explained what Matthew needed to do. He said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29

Worrying and carrying everything on your shoulders is overwhelming. Give it over to God. #anxiety Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

God can give us a deep sense of peace as we work through our issues. God says more than just, “Don’t be anxious,” or “Get over it,” He tells us our prayers and petitions are the keys to opening the door of overcoming our anxiety

Resources for Anxiety:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode all about identifying toxic relationships. A toxic relationship will suck the life and energy from you. It contaminates your self-esteem and your happiness. In this episode, I talk with Ashely about all the toxic, hurtful things her messed up boyfriend does to her. Then I talk with Kelsea, who’s boyfriend is sucking the life out of her causing her to be confused and miserable. Lastly, I talk with Jess. He and his girlfriend keep going back to the destructive parts of their relationship causing confusion, hurt and chaos in their relationship.

 

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

 

How Can I Stop Lying? EP 19

You Can Turn Away from Compulsive Lying

In This Episode:

Since mankind began, lying has been a tragic part of our lives. So awful is it, so terrible is its consequences, God forbids it in the 10 commandments. He said, do not lie (Leviticus 19:11). And in Proverbs 12:22, God spoke again and said, “Lying lips are abomination to the LORD.” Yet, all of us have told lies and at some time or another lived a lie.

The more we speak truth, the happier we will be. Yet, sadly some people are compulsive liars. A compulsive liar is someone who lies out of habit. Lying is their normal and reflexive way of responding to questions. Compulsive liars bend the truth about everything, large and small.

For a compulsive liar, telling the truth is very awkward and uncomfortable while lying feels right. Nonetheless a compulsive liar suffers greatly.

Take Hunter for example, he said, “I can’t stop lying…even about stupid things. It breaks my mom’s heart that I keep lying to her. I hate that I’m doing this to her and I hate that I do it. I feel like I am going to earn a reputation as a liar and that’s the last thing I want. I hate myself.” Hunter needs a miracle in his life. His lying is destroying him, just as lying is interfering in 3 other people’s lives whom I spoke with. I talked with Lee, Jason, and Ellie, who in one way or another are caught up in the world of lying

The more we speak truth, the happier we will be. Yet, sadly some people are compulsive liars. #lying Click To Tweet

Trying to Come Out of the Liar’s Closet

Lee has a compulsive lying problem and has been dealing with it for 10 years. She tried to get some help from a counselor but once she admitted her problem, she felt judged and second-guessed.

Lee is uncomfortable and angry. She’s trying to come out of the liar’s closet. She’s letting the world know about her dirty little secret, that she is a compulsive liar.

Lying has become part of Lee’s lifestyle for at least 10 years now. The habit isn’t going to go away just because she wants it to. It takes at least 66 days to change a habit. That’s a long time when you’re an addicted liar. She’s now coming to grips with what it will cost her to get free. It won’t be easy. Lying has become a part of her life. She uses it whenever she wants or needs to. Most of the time she lies just to lie, when telling the truth would be much easier.

Living in Your Own Personal Hell

One of the major consequences Lee must face is knowing no one believes her anymore. Her friends and family can’t trust her and they deeply resent her. No one likes to be played or lied to but the compulsive liar is playing people most of the time.

Lee has dug a big hole. She lives in her own personal hell. Lying has provided a place, where she can be in charge of her own reality. But when caught, unveils her rage about her situation. Lee is like a trapped animal, she’s angry and will blame anybody anywhere, except herself. She refuses to take responsibility for her deep, troubling issues.

My prayers are with Lee, I feel sorry she’s in such a predicament. But with God’s help, she can break out of 10 years of compulsive lying. She has her work cut out for her, it will be painful, but there is still light at the end of the tunnel. Let’s all pray, she will succeed.

With God’s help, you can break out of compulsive lying and become free of it's hold on you. #lying Click To Tweet

Wherever You Go, You Take Your Issues with You

Jason moved to try to get away from his troubles but his lying issue followed him. He has been trying to make a U-turn but no one believes anything he says.

I like Jason but he easily cons himself. He moved away from his hometown, thinking that would help him but he doesn’t get it. The truth is wherever Jason goes, he takes his issues with him. Changing locations won’t cure lying.

Jason is caught up in the old lying trap. He’s living a wild lifestyle but wants to cover it up. He has to tell lies to do that. But then he has to tell lies to cover the lies. He’s exhausted, partying away and continually lying to cover it up. He’s living a lie and his lies are killing him.

Time to Come Clean and Face Up to the Lies

Now, it’s time for him to come clean with his brother and sister-in-law. He thought he’d fooled them but they could smell the alcohol. It’s not easy to confess to the people you’ve lied to because you’ve tried to paint them as fools. So, it takes tremendous amount of humility and courage to face up to what you’ve been doing. Liars are smooth talkers but to confess to others means to set aside their smooth-talking tools to speak the truth and that’s not easy.

Jason doesn’t understand just how deep his love of lying goes. He, like most of us, doesn’t understand how evil his heart really is. The Bible says, “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?” Jeremiah 17:9

It’s a common mistake we humans make to think our hearts are a great deal better than they really are. The truth of the matter is, we are a mess. To tell the truth to ourselves, about ourselves is one of the most important things we can do. To lie to ourselves and to others is to act like Satan. Jesus was talking to religious leaders of the day who thought they were righteous because of the good works they did. Jesus set them straight. He told them:

“You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:44

Good news for Jason, He is starting to tell the truth about himself and that means he’s on his way to freedom.

Liars are smooth talkers but to confess to others means to set aside their smooth-talking tools. Click To Tweet

Are You Buying into Someone’s Lies?

Elli’s boyfriend lies to her all the time about anything and everything. She can’t trust him at all and it’s destroying their relationship. She can’t bring herself to break up with him even though she knows it can never work because he always lies to her.

Relationships Need Trust and Respect

Elli was willing for a long time to buy into her boyfriend’s lies. Why, because he has an awesome personality, is persuasive, and the lies he tells are powerful. She may think they have a great relationship but without trust and respect there isn’t one. A relationship controlled by lies is nothing more than a front. Perhaps if Elli leaves him, it will be a wake-up call and he’ll be forced to examine his own pathetic issues. There is hope for him if he turns away from a life of lying to a life of following Christ.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

All of us in some way in another are liars, none of us are perfect. My hope is whether we have told small or big lies, we will hate it for what it is and what it’s done in ours and other people’s lives. And so, we too will turn away from lying and trust in Christ to help us walk in the truth. Remember, the more you speak truth, the happier you will be!

My hope is you will turn away from lying and trust in Christ to help you walk in the truth. ~Dawson Click To Tweet

Resources for Lying:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on anxiety. Having some anxiety is normal but for some people, it becomes so frequent, and forceful, that it takes over their lives and affects their ability to function. In this episode, I talk with Iva – who doesn’t really know why he has anxiety, Allison – who is way overloaded with emotional trauma, and Matthew – who has suffered from anxiety attacks and even thought at one time he might die but has found strength in God.

 

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

 

How do I Stop My Gambling Addiction? EP 18

The Adrenaline Rush of Gambling is Overwhelming

In This Episode:

I Like the Rush of Gambling

The love of money is so gripping, it can cause us to wander away from God and lead us into all kinds of trouble, where we have broken hearts with many sorrows. And we don’t just break our own hearts but also those near to us.

In this episode, I speak with Mike, who spent his trust fund money on gambling, money that was intended for his education. I talk with Paris, who hasn’t been to the casino recently but still feels the temptation. And he almost lost his wife because of his gambling addiction. Finally, I speak with David, who is losing friends and family over his addiction and is spending money he doesn’t have, even gambling during his breaks at work.

It can take a while for gamblers to hit the wall so to speak, because most are optimistic by nature, easily fooled by their own reasoning. They think everything is going to work out just fine. They live for the high of winning.

The love of money is so gripping, it can cause us to wander away from God. @dawsonradio #gambling Click To Tweet

I’m Going to Win Eventually

Gamblers can easily become delusional. They hold beliefs which contradict reality. They reason within themselves, next time I play, I’ll hit the jackpot and everything’s going to be great. Always chasing the big prize, while slipping and sliding into more and more debt.

King Solomon wrote, “Those who work their land will have abundant food, but those who chase fantasies will have their fill of poverty.” Proverbs 28:19

The gambler is chasing a fantasy of winning big. At some point, the gambler loses his grip on reality. The buzz to the gambler is that winning hand, which will set everything straight. Some addicted gamblers are extremely arrogant and narcissistic. They think people who don’t play are chumps for not having the guts to take a chance of walking away with easy money.

The gambler is chasing a fantasy of winning big. @dawsonradio #addiction Click To Tweet

What Gamblers Think…

  • The buzz of winning is awesome.
  • It’s easy money.
  • Winning will bring me massive thrills.
  • I’ll win more than I lose.
  • Even if I lose, I’ll win next time.
  • Seeking the great thrill is an awesome escape.
  • I’m not breaking the law.
  • Everybody gambles.
  • I’m smarter than the game.
  • How can it be so bad, if it feels so right?
  • I’m not hurting anyone.
  • I’ll figure out how to pay my debt.
  • My family will put up with my addiction.
  • I control it, it doesn’t control me.
  • What I’m doing isn’t bad, it’s not like I’m doing drugs.

What does God say about gambling? Why does he want us to stay far from it?

While God does not say specifically, don’t gamble. He has a lot to say about the sin behind gambling, which is the love of money. A writer on BibleStudyTools.com put it this way: “Most often when people gamble it is because they become addicted to the love of money. A simple game can become a sin when it takes over our minds and hearts and leads us down a road of never being satisfied.”

Gambling adds fuel to the consuming fire of the love of money. Most gamblers end up craving the thrill of chasing the money they love and the rush of winning it. The Bible says, “For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.” 1 Timothy 6:10

Money in and of itself is not evil. It is just a tool. But the love of money is. King Solomon, the wisest man in the Bible said, “Whoever loves money never has enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with their income. This too is meaningless.” Ecclesiastes 5:10

And so, the gambler is never satisfied, ever. What the gambler wants is more thrills, more games, and more money. He can never get enough. He is forever craving, wanting even more but never satisfied.

Jesus said, “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.” Matthew 6:24

If you love money, you will not love God. If you love God, you will soon despise the love of money. Unless the gambler turns to God and turns away from the love of money, he will forever despise God.

Money in and of itself is not evil. It is just a tool. But the love of money is. @dawsonradio Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

God uses the consequences of our actions to force us back to Him. God is bigger than your gambling problem, no matter how big it is. It’s not just a matter of telling the world you want to reset but it’s the ongoing hard work it will take to get free. You can change your love of money to a love for God and He will help you if you ask. You can find freedom from your addiction.

Resources for Getting Over a Gambling Addiction:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on lying. The more we speak truth, the happier we will be yet, sadly, everyone lies at some point and some people even become compulsive liars. Compulsive liars lie even when it would be easier to tell the truth. In this episode, I talk with Lee – who is trying to come out of the liar’s closet, Jason – who is living a lie and his lies are killing him, and Elli – who has willingly bought into her boyfriend’s lies for a very long time.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

How To Move On From Your Ex : EP 17

Getting Over Your Ex is Not Easy

In This Episode:

You’ve been in a relationship with someone and now that relationship is over. You have ties to that person which are hard to break. Sometimes, it’s tremendously harder to move on from them than you thought it would be. If you’re having a hard time moving on from your ex, join me as I speak with Anthony, Jessica, and Keith, each of them trying to get over their ex! You might just find some advice that works for you as well.

I Can’t Stop Thinking About Her

Anthony’s ex-girlfriend told his current girlfriend he was cheating on her with her (his ex).  His girlfriend believed his ex, so they decided to break it off and just be friends. But now, Anthony can’t stop thinking about her.

Anthony thought his relationship with his girlfriend was much stronger than it turned out to be. They had only been in a relationship a few months. It was hardly enough time for them to build a solid foundation. Every relationship is tested in some way. When their relationship was tested, it crumbled.

What Anthony’s ex did was wrong. No one, including Anthony needs their reputation trashed. But in the end, it became a blessing. It helped bring to light the trust issues his girlfriend had and his obsessiveness in their relationship.

They both had their reasons for breaking up and agreed they needed to be just friends. But, once Anthony realized the relationship with his girlfriend was truly over, he began to obsess. He became emotionally overwhelmed with what he could not have, which was her.

What he needed to do was go back over the reasons they decided to break up to begin with. All the reasons are still there. He should let his obsessive feelings go, even though he doesn’t feel like it. The sooner he lets go, the quicker he will stop obsessing over his ex-girlfriend. And the sooner he’ll be able to walk away completely.

Can't stop thinking about your ex? You can walk away completely. @dawsonradio #relationships Click To Tweet

He Broke Up with Me and I Didn’t Take It Well

Jessica’s boyfriend broke up with her but she knew there was still something between them. He started dating a girl 10 days after breaking up with her. Then a bit later, Jessica and he started having sex even though he was with another girl. Jessica said she’s still wants him so she’s willing to put up with being used. The problem is that whatever he’s saying to Jessica, he’s staying to this other girl. Whatever he’s doing to Jessica, he’s doing to his girlfriend as well.

So, many people know their relationship is over but they try to prop it up anyway. Most of the time it doesn’t work and ends up in a lot of heartache. In Jessica’s case, she tried to prop up her relationship with her ex with sex.

Jessica is shifting the blame and saying it’s okay for her to have sex with her ex, because this other girl took her boyfriend away from her. What she’s saying is, I’m willing to disrespect myself to get what I need which is feeling loved by him again.

Instead, Jessica needs to stop having sex with her ex so she can walk away with self-respect. Sex will not meet her deepest needs or bring her boyfriend back. Her ex doesn’t have the capacity to meet her deepest needs. He became tired of her before, and he’ll get tired of her again. People ask too much of their exes. They ask them to meet needs only God can meet.

If you want to know more about having a meaningful relationship with God, check out my podcast episode number 9.  You can hear how Ronnie’s life was changed and how yours can too.

People know their #relationship is over but they try to prop it up anyway with #sex. @dawsonradio Click To Tweet

I Can’t Find Reasons To Move On

Keith feels stuck in a rut. He split up with his girlfriend 2 years ago. They were 6 months away from being married but things deteriorated and their relationship ended. Keith keeps thinking about what could have been if they hadn’t broken up. He said he can’t find reasons to move on.

If you are not over your ex after 2 years, something is wrong. What could keep him obsessing that long?

It’s because they became serious way too quickly. They were acting like they were married, but the relationship did not hold together. Once you start acting like you’re married, you’re in deep. It may be fun to act that way, but it causes a lot of pressure on the relationship. Slow down, the action will happen soon enough.

There is a common problem with people who can’t get over their ex: 

  • They are not remembering their ex the way they really were.
  • They are remembering a fantasy of their ex.
  • They keep the fantasy going by saving all the mementos of their ex.

It’s difficult to throw away memories of the past but Keith will continue to have a difficult time with his emotions if he doesn’t.

Walking away isn’t easy when you thought you were in love but in reality, you weren’t. It’s the truth that sets us free. It’s time for Keith to believe the truth his relationship is over so he can get on with the rest of his life. There is so much more to live for.

Walking away isn’t easy when you thought you were in love but in reality, you weren’t. @dawsonradio Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Just about everybody will walk away from an ex at one time or another. So many people living in the past, obsessing over something that wasn’t even a reality. Ask yourself, am I living in the truth or am I in a fantasy? That’s a difficult question to answer but if you can answer yourself truthfully then you can get on with the rest of your life.

Resources for Getting Over Your Ex:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me for my next episode on gambling addiction. The love of money is so gripping, it can cause us to wander away from God and lead us into all kinds of trouble, where we have broken hearts with many sorrows. And we don’t just break our own hearts but also those near to us. In this episode I speak with Mike, Paris, and David each of them dealing with troubles, stemming from their gambling addictions.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

What If I’m Pregnant and Not Ready?: EP 16

It Can Be Stressful to Have an Unplanned Pregnancy

In This Episode:

If your pregnant and it’s unexpected, it can be quite a shock! You might be wondering who to turn to and what to do. In this episode, I speak with Kayla, Lee, and Tarah. They are all in very different situations but each of them is pregnant and having their own set of struggles.

Kayla is not exactly sure who the birth father is, Lee’s boyfriend is an alcoholic and smokes weed, and Tarah hasn’t settled on keeping the baby but she says abortion and adoption are not options for her.

Give yourself time

I know it can be scary to have an unplanned pregnancy. You don’t know what your family and friends are going to say. Sometimes the baby’s daddy reacts badly or is not even in the picture anymore. But if you’re pregnant, the baby is coming and you have a limited amount of time to make decisions. You need to give yourself time to absorb the shock of being pregnant, then rally the right people around you, and start to make the life-changing decisions of what to do.

I’m Pregnant and Don’t Know Who the Father Is

When you get pregnant, you’re not the only player in the game. Kayla needs to find out who the birth father is. There should be no guessing. She became pregnant by one of two guys. She doesn’t want to have to tell her child years from now, “I don’t know who your birth father is.”

The baby is by far the most vulnerable in this drama and needs to be Kayla’s number one priority. She can do the best thing for her baby and herself by finding out the truth. Jesus said, “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)

A DNA test may help

So, Kayla should go to the doctor and figure out the timeline to determine who the birth father is. If it is still not clear, then she should have DNA testing done, once the baby is born. But she needs to remember, the child’s well-being should be considered first.

My Baby’s Daddy is an Alcoholic and Smokes Weed

One of the biggest issues facing a pregnant mother is the character of the baby’s daddy. She needs to figure out what kind of a person he is and answer the question, “Is he stable enough to be in my child’s life?”

Lee told me she’s pregnant and then after dating her boyfriend for 2 years, found out he’s an alcoholic and smokes weed. As she was telling me this, I thought to myself, if she just found out about his addictions 2 weeks ago, think of all the things she hasn’t found out about him yet.

For example, he could be cheating on her. If he is willing to yield to the temptation of drugs and alcohol, cheating on her would be an easy choice to make.

She will most likely find out he’s also a thief. He’s got to get the money somewhere to feed his habit, not to mention, his baby. So, rest assure, if he hasn’t started stealing, he will soon.

The needs of the child

He’s also self-centered. Anyone addicted to drugs and alcohol cares only about themselves and how they are going to feed their habit. If he’s so consumed with his drugs and alcohol, he won’t be able to focus on the needs of his child or you. Having a baby is all give, they don’t care if you’re tired or upset or whatever. If they have a need, you’re going to hear about it.

Also, if you think your boyfriend is in bad shape now, you haven’t seen anything yet. Nothing good happens with addictions. You don’t want an unstable, addict father around, he’ll end up doing more damage than good.

I have real hope for Lee, she’s already thinking about what’s best for her baby. But she really needs our prayers. She faces an uphill battle and only God can give her the strength to love and protect her baby.

I’m Stressed, Pregnant and Against Abortion

Tarah needs to help lessen her stress. She’s making it harder by not talking to her mother or family who hopefully will support her. If her mother doesn’t want to help and kicks her out, there are others who will find a home for Tarah and her baby. Make sure you have people supporting you and your decisions but, ultimately only you, can make the decision.

Tarah is up against it. She’s pregnant and feels all alone and knows she has a choice to make.

There are only 3 options

Anytime, one gets pregnant, there’s only 3 options: abortion, adoption, and keeping the baby. By saying yes to one, you’re saying no to the other two. It’s easy to figure out, it’s not always so easy to make the choice. And this is the kind of decision you can’t take forever to make; the baby is coming whether you like it or not.

Tarah made it clear, she didn’t want an abortion. She also said she didn’t want to choose adoption, this leaves her with one choice, to raise the baby. If you choose to keep your baby, you don’t have to figure out everything right away. As Jesus taught, take it one day at a time. He said: “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” (Matthew 6:34)

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

If you are pregnant, and don’t know what to do. You need to first gather all the facts, which includes going to the doctor to have the test to make sure you are pregnant. Secondly, you need to get people around you who care about you. You need a support group of people who will encourage you, love on you and give you wise counsel. Then with the help of those who love you, you can go on to make the best decisions for you and your baby.

Resources for an Unexpected Pregnancy:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

You’ve been in a relationship with someone and now that relationship is over. You have ties to that person which are hard to break. Sometimes, it’s tremendously harder to move on from them than you thought it would be. If you’re having a hard time moving on from your ex, join me for my next episode. I speak with Anthony, Jessica, and Keith, each of them trying to get over their ex! You might just find some advice that works for you as well.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

I Can’t Believe They Cheated on Me!: EP 15

Going Through the Pain of Being Cheated On

In This Episode:

Let’s talk about cheating again but tackle the other side of it, What to do when you’ve been cheated on! Last podcast (episode 14), I talked with Josh, Sean and Ameera who did the cheating. This episode, I speak with Tabitha, James and Katelynn, who have been cheated on. Let’s hear firsthand, what it is to go through the pain of being cheated on.

Hoops He Needed to Jump Through After Breaking Her Trust

Tabitha gave away her heart for her boyfriend. Even though he had already cheated on her, she agreed to marry him anyway. She took a chance she should have never taken. It’s a huge mistake to agree to a bigger commitment when the smaller ones haven’t been met. Jesus said, “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.” Luke 16:10

Tabitha’s fiancé had not proven he could be faithful. She wanted the relationship to work so badly, she trusted him again even though he had broken her trust. There are hoops he needed to jump through to prove to her he was serious about being faithful, like counseling and accountability groups. Instead, they started talking marriage. They tried to put their relationship back together, without dealing with the difficult issues. They thought a commitment to marriage was going to solve their trust issues. It seldom does. They even traded user names and passwords to help him stay accountable but that didn’t work either. She caught him having inappropriate conversations with girls online.

Now, she’s in a difficult situation because they’ve set a date for their wedding. Some money has already been spent and preparations have started. Obviously, it would be huge mistake to go ahead with the wedding. One mistake, setting the date, doesn’t mean you have to make another and go ahead with the marriage. Better disappointment and some heartache now then the grief after they’re married.

It’s time for Tabitha to break things off completely with her fiancé. It’s going to be hard but the longer she waits, the harder it will be. She needs to begin to focus on her healing and moving on with her life.

I Don’t Care Enough About You To Stay Faithful.

James received the incredible shocking news that his girlfriend has been cheating on him. To make matters even worse, she is pregnant and the baby is not his. James never saw it coming; after all, they had been together for 4 years. James responded to her betrayal in all the wrong ways. He started drinking and he’s so upset he’s not thinking clearly.

When someone cheats like James’ girlfriend did, she’s making a statement which says, I don’t care enough about you to stay faithful. For James to try to salvage the relationship would only make matters worse. There is one thing for James’ to be thankful for, this other guy has taken his girlfriend off his hands. Fortunately, James found out what she is really like before making any bigger commitments to her.

James can’t avoid all the pain, either way he’s going to suffer. But he can cause himself much more time and hurt by trying to prop up a dead relationship. Instead, James needs a whole new foundation for his life. He seriously needs to turn to God, who will never cheat on him, and receive God’s unconditional love. Then he can see himself as God does, valuable, worthy, and in need of His love. It sounds impossible now but James can come to the other side of this cheating nightmare even stronger.

Being cheated on doesn’t have to be the end of your life story. You can recover, move on and have an awesome life.

Cheated On Multiple Times

Katelynn’s boyfriend has cheated on her multiple times. If you find yourself obsessing in a relationship, you don’t have a good one. You may have heard the saying, “If you love someone, let them go. If they come back to you, they’re yours. If they don’t come back to you, they weren’t yours to begin with.”

If she keeps blowing up his phone, what is she saying to him about herself? That she thinks she can’t live without him. That’s bogus. She needs to hold her head high, and not belittle herself by what she is doing, which is borderline harassment. If she keeps obsessing, she isn’t focusing on her own life. There are people at her school who need her and she has a lot to offer.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Tabitha, James and Katelynn have each been heartbroken from being cheated on. When you are cheated on, it’s really hard to trust in future relationships. But being cheated on doesn’t have to be the end of your story. You can recover and learn to trust again! Consider turning to God, who will never cheat on you! You can receive God’s unconditional love and see yourself as God does…valuable, worthy, saved by grace, chosen and a representative of Him!

Resources for cheating:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

In the next episode, join me as I speak with Kayla, Lee and Tarah, each of them pregnant and needing guidance. Kayla is not sure who the birth father is, Lee’s boyfriend is addicted to drugs and alcohol, and Tarah has a life and death decision to make.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

I Had Sex and Cheated, Should I Confess?: EP 14

Facing the Consequences of Cheating.

Sometimes You Make Choices and Sometimes Your Choices Make You.

In This Episode:

Let’s talk about cheating. People have different ideas of what they think it is. It all comes down to betraying your partner by doing something intimate with another, which he or she would not approve. Here’s a list of what some people might consider cheating, from a blog called, “What Counts as Cheating?”.

Sometimes You Make Choices and Sometimes Your Choices Make You. @dawsonradio #Dawsonism #cheating Click To Tweet

What Counts as Cheating in Relationships?

  • Deny being in a relationship with someone else
  • Sleeping in the same bed with someone else
  • Purchasing intimate gifts and presents for someone else
  • Chatting online with someone else (online affairs)
  • Having sexual contact with someone else (physical infidelity)
  • Becoming emotionally involved with someone else (emotional infidelity)
  • Sharing their most private thoughts and feelings with someone else
  • Becoming best friends with someone of the opposite sex
  • And the list could go on and on….

No matter how you or I might define cheating, you certainly will recognize it, if it happens to you. Where there is cheating, negative consequences come knocking, full of pain and regret.

Should He Confess?

In this episode, we hear from Josh, who really cares about his girlfriend but the fact he cheated on her early in their relationship is weighing on him. Should he tell her what he did? Is the foundation of his relationship strong enough that it can take an earthquake and a few aftershocks? He could own up to it, and seek his girlfriend’s forgiveness. But then he runs the risk of losing her; or he could remain silent and live with the guilt and shame, which will continue to haunt him and ruin their relationship. Josh desperately needs to turn to God before he even considers confessing. If he would seek God’s forgiveness, he would have peace. Then he would have the courage to confess to his girlfriend what he did and with God’s mercy and help, face the consequences. We don’t know whether or not Josh’s girlfriend will break up with him. However, the important thing is he will have faced the consequences of his actions and can start living with a clear conscience.

You had sex and cheated, should you confess? #cheating #relationships Click To Tweet

He Cheated and Got an STD

Then we hear from Sean. Sean was drunk, had sex with his girlfriend’s friend and ended up with the “crabs.” Do you get the idea Sean is caught in a trap? His girlfriend already suspects she got the crabs from Sean and when it is finally confirmed, she’s going to be furious. Sean’s convinced she won’t stay with him and apart from a miracle I don’t think she will either. Sean didn’t understand or care that drunken parties and loose women lead to heartache. As I shared with Sean, the best he can look to get out of this sorted mess is a lesson.

She Had Sex With His Father

Through Ameera, you can see how complicated, painful, and confusing life gets when people cheat. Just to make this point even clearer, let’s sort through the players in this tragic story. First, there is Ameera. She allowed herself to be seduced by her boyfriend’s father. She could have said no but she didn’t. If Ameera hadn’t had sex with her boyfriend’s father, life would be much better for her. Instead, she chose to betray her boyfriend and now has to face the consequences. Secondly, there is Ameera’s boyfriend. He is a victim. He was betrayed by both Ameera and his father. It’s one thing to be cheated on by your girlfriend but it’s a totally different kind of hurt to be betrayed by your own father. Then, there is Ameera boyfriend’s father. There’s not much good we can say about him. He is truly the villain. He had no business doing what he did. He will be very fortunate if he doesn’t lose his wife and his son. He needs to break off all ties with Ameera, for good. Then there’s also Ameera’s boyfriend’s mother. This is a woman who has a mother-daughter relationship with Ameera. She has no idea what happened. She has been betrayed by both her husband, and Ameera. Ameera needs to turn to God’s love. It’s going to be hard for her as she separates herself from this family but with God’s help, there is always a way out.

If you’ve cheated on your boyfriend or girlfriend then this episode is for you! Or if you’ve been cheated on, it might help you to get a glimpse into what someone who cheats is thinking.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

We heard Josh, Sean, and Ameera talk about how their lives got much more complicated after they cheated. As we’ve learned, nothing good comes from cheating, except the hard lessons learned. If we follow the teachings of Christ, found in the amazing truth of the Bible, we can learn to live by these truths without suffering the awful consequences of bad choices and instead have a life of love and peace.

I hope this podcast has helped you. So many people ignore the truth about cheating, they live their whole lives facing the consequences. Remember, God is a God of grace who will help us face our failures and rebellion.

Resources to understand why you’re cheating:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

In the next episode, join me as I speak with Tabitha, James and Katelynn, who are on the opposite side of things…they were all cheated on. When you are cheated on, it’s hard to trust in future relationships BUT being cheated on doesn’t have to be the end of your life story. You can recover and learn to trust again.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Are Your Parents Against Your Relationship?: EP 13

What to Do When Parents Don’t Approve of Your Relationship.

Are Your Parents Against Your Relationship?

In This Episode:

What do you do when your girlfriend or boyfriend’s parents hate you? What do you do when your parents don’t want you with your boyfriend or girlfriend? This episode answers those questions. First, we start with Calvin, who’s girlfriend’s dad hates him but Calvin feels he hasn’t done anything wrong. Then we go to Erin, she’s head over heels in love but her mom doesn’t like her dating an older guy with a child. Then, we hear from Chris. His girlfriend accused him of rape last time they broke up, so his parents do not want them back together. If you are in a relationship and your parents don’t approve of who you are dating or your boyfriend or girlfriend’s parents don’t approve of you, then this episode is for you!

What do you do when your #parents don’t want you with your boyfriend or girlfriend? @DawsonRadio Click To Tweet

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

We’ve heard Calvin, Erin, and Chris talk about their relationships and the issues with their parents or the issues with their boyfriend or girlfriend’s parents. If you are in a similar situation, have you considered the need to listen to the wisdom of your parents, closest friends, and those around you about your relationship? Those who love and care about you are usually coming from a good place. They want to see you do well and make good decisions. They are not always right and I’m not telling you to always follow their advice. What I am recommending for you to do, is to listen to their wisdom and then weigh it against your own so you can make the best choices for your life.

Resources For Help With Parents and Dating:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me in my next episode where I talk with Josh, Sean, and Ameera. Each of them are facing consequences from cheating. I’m not going to beat them up. Instead, I hope to help them learn from their mistakes and make better choices in the future. So many people ignore the truth about cheating, they live their whole lives facing the consequences. Then in my next podcast, we will hear from 3 people who were cheated on and we’ll talk about how to heal and move on from being cheated on.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Finding Purpose, A Cheating Boyfriend, and Jealousy: EP 12

The Hard Times Were the Best Times Because…

In This Episode:

Looking for Purpose

Luke was kicked out and has been living in his car for 2 weeks. He just found a friend to stay with and is looking for a job but things are not going his way yet. He’s determined not to quit trying. In the midst of all his struggles, he’s looking for his purpose.
Sometimes hard times force us to look for answers to life’s questions; such as: Why am I alive? What is the purpose of my being here? Luke is searching for the answers to those hard questions.

Played by Her Boyfriend

Nakita’s boyfriend played her pretty hard. She stood by his side, loved him and supported him. Instead of being faithful to her and treating her well, he lied to her and cheated on her. Now, the girl he cheated with, is pregnant. Nakita is having a hard time letting go of him but the truth is, there are no roads which lead back to him.

Jealousy Is Tearing Her Apart

What do you do when a friend shines brighter than you? Renee’s friend is getting all the attention and Renee is jealous of her. Renee says jealousy is ruining her life. The truth is, if we compare ourselves to others, it can cause us to have a jealous spirit. Renee doesn’t need to compare herself to her friend. Her friend may be beautiful and get lots of attention but Renee has been made in God’s image and has her own great qualities, especially in the eyes of God.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Most people’s problems are so deep and complicated, they are not solved on their own. I give advice which can help but Luke, Nakita, and Renee need to take the next right step. It’s not going to be easy but that’s why we have a lot of resources to help them and you, if you are facing your own struggles.

Resources to help you with finding purpose and relationship struggles:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me in my next episode where I talk with Calvin, Erin, and Chris, who are all dealing with parents against their relationships. Calvin’s girlfriend’s dad hates him. Erin’s mom is not happy about her dating an older guy, and Chris’ parents don’t like that he is back with his ex. My goal is to offer them insights which could help them and hopefully help you as well.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Tattoos, Cigarettes, and A Friend Using Weed: EP 11

Need Help in Taking the Next Right Step?

In This Episode:

Worried Her Grandma Won’t Like Her Tattooed Boyfriend

Tara’s boyfriend has a lot of tattoos. Her grandmother was already concerned when she found out he had a mohawk. What’s she going to think when she meets him for the first time and sees all of his tattoos?

Wants to Quit His Smoking Addiction

Frankie is smoking around a pack of cigarettes a day and is having a hard time quitting. How can he stop when he’s around a lot of others who smoke all the time?

Willing to Rescue a Friend

Tyler’s best friend smokes marijuana and Tyler is not sure if he should do anything about it. At this point, does he say anything or act like it’s never happened?

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Most people’s problems are so deep and complicated, they are not solved on their own. I give advice which can help but Tara, Frankie, and Tyler need to take the next right step. It’s not going to be easy but that’s why we have a lot of resources to help them and you, if you are facing your own struggles.

Resources to help you with your struggles:

  • Take a look at my eBooks: Understanding Substance Abuse, and Understanding a Relationship with God.
  • Need a safe place to learn how to overcome your hurts, habits, and hang-ups? You will find free group support at Celebrate Recovery. Find a support group by state: www.celebraterecovery.com.
  • To learn more about having a meaningful relationship with God, check out my podcast episode 9: Find Hope and Peace Through a Relationship with God. I talked to a guy named Ronnie. The call was amazing, it really spoke to me. I think you’ll like it a lot. It just might be the most important podcast you’ll ever listen to.
  • Need prayer? I believe God wants to change your life and mine, through prayer. If you need prayer and would like to have someone pray for you, go to the ThePrayerZone.com and check it out.
  • Need to talk about your issues? Sign up for an Email Mentor, an online coach who will email you and come along beside you to offer support.

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me in my next episode where I talk with Luke, Nakita, and Renee. Luke wants to figure out his purpose in life. Nakita’s boyfriend has just gotten another girl pregnant and Renee is dealing with some major jealousy of her best friend. My goal is to offer insights to them which could change their lives and hopefully, yours as well.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

You Can’t Let Excuses Stop You from Facing Reality : EP 10

Bring it to the Light, It Will Be Alright

Addiction, Eating Disorders, Cheating…You Don’t Have to Do This Alone.

In This Episode:

This episode covers addiction, eating disorders and cheating. Join me in my conversations with Casey, Mackenzie, and Corey. Each of them in need of sound, Godly counsel. Casey’s baby is in desperate need of a heart transplant, Casey is suffering and has turned to drugs to cope. Mackenzie doesn’t understand just how serious her eating disorder is and won’t reveal what’s truly going on with her. Corey has the weight of the world on his shoulders. His mom has had multiple affairs and he’s trying to protect his little sister and keep the family together. They each have really tough situations to deal with, so it’s good they are reaching out for help!

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Most people’s problems are so deep and complicated, they are not solved on their own. I give advice which can help Casey, Mackenzie, and Corey but they have to take the next right step. It’s not going to be easy but that’s why we have a lot of resources to help them and you, if you are facing your own struggles.

Resources to help you with your struggles:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Join me in my next episode where I talk with 3 really good people, Tara, Frankie, and Tyler. Tara is worried that her grandma won’t like her boyfriend because he has a mohawk and several tattoos. Frankie’s struggling to give up cigarettes, and Tyler is worried about his best friend who is smoking marijuana. My goal is to offer insights to them which could change their lives and hopefully, yours as well.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Ronnie’s Life Changing Decision: EP 9

Is Your Life a Mess?

Find Hope and Peace Through a Relationship with God.

In This Episode:

Some of our problems are so great, only God can solve them. He is the only one who has the power to rescue us and transform our lives. In this episode, I have a heart to heart talk with Ronnie who’s been hooked on meth and needs something in his life to change or he’s not going to make it.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Are you at a place in your life where your problems seem unsolvable, or where you really need something to change? If you are desperate for something more, or if you need purpose and answers for your life, this is the podcast for you. Real and lasting hope can only come through a relationship with Jesus. When we reach out to God, that’s when he rescues us.

Resources for help with making a life changing decision:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

The next episode is where we will go in-depth into Casey, Mackenzie, and Corey’s struggles. Casey’s baby is in the hospital and she’s struggling with addiction, Mackenzie has an eating disorder and Corey’s home life is a mess. My goal is to offer insights to them which could change their lives and hopefully, yours as well.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Amy’s Mother Abandoned Her: EP 8

How to Heal from Mother Abandonment.

In This Episode:

For 14 years, Amy was practically raising herself, while her mom was in the bars drinking. Amy’s mom wasn’t there for her when she needed her the most. The hurt Amy has from her mom abandoning her has continued into her adult life. Mother abandonment is one of the worst things a person can experience and it can have devastating consequences. In this episode, I talk about those consequences and share some of the ways to begin to deal with the pain and get healing.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Your mother may have abandoned you but it doesn’t have to define you for the rest of your life. I want to help you discover healing from mother abandonment. Let’s face the truth together, accept that your mom may never change, and then work on forgiving her. I also want to you to understand that God loves you and no matter how deeply you’ve been hurt by your mother, I’m confident with God’s help you can find emotional and spiritual healing. Mother abandonment might be the beginning of your story but it’s not going to be the end.

Resources for help with abandonment:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

My next episode is on making peace with God.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Can Cody Forgive His Mom?: EP 7

How to Forgive Those Who Have Deeply Hurt You.

In This Episode:

No doubt there is at least one person in your life you need to forgive. This person has deeply hurt you, violated you and caused you tremendous pain. What the person did to you is inexcusable but it is forgivable. Forgiving them means you are giving up your right to get even with that person. Even if you don’t feel like it, choose forgiveness for your own well-being.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

What happens if you don’t forgive? You become a slave to bitterness. Bitterness will corrupt you and those around you. Forgiving is not easy but with God’s help, all things are possible. He forgave us therefore we absolutely can offer forgiveness to others, no matter the offense. The Bible says to, “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” (Colossians 3:13)

Resources for help with forgiveness:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

My next episode is on mother abandonment.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Carmen’s Deep Self-Esteem Wounds: EP 6

What to Do When You Hate Yourself.

In This Episode:

At one time or another, we’ve all been disgusted with ourselves and wallowed in the world of self-loathing. You might not have said, “I hate myself,” but no doubt you have believed horrible lies about who you are. These lies are called false beliefs. They are misconceptions resulting from incorrect reasoning.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Have you ever said a false-belief to yourself, such as: “I hate myself,” “I’m a failure,” or “There’s nothing to love about me?” These negative self-beliefs are lies. Don’t buy the lie, buy the truth. You need to learn and accept the truth and you will be set free. The ultimate truth comes from God’s word and putting His truth against the false beliefs. Try this simple formula:

First – Identify the lie.
Second – Search God’s word for his truth.
Third – Replace the lie and begin to dwell and think on the truth.

Resources for what to do when you hate yourself:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

The next episode is on forgiveness.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Rachel Questions if She’s in Love: EP 5

How to Know if You’re in Love.

In This Episode:

You don’t fall in love, you fall in ditches. Having a loving relationship is not something that just happens. Romantic love is a deep emotional need and an act of the will, based on a clear understanding of the other person. It takes a lot of time and hard work on the part of both people involved. No one can tell you if you are in love. But, I can tell you what a loving relationship looks like, and what some of the ingredients are which make up a loving and meaningful relationship.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

It’s very important to know whether you have a healthy, loving relationship or not. If you realize you don’t have some of the ingredients which make up a loving relationship or are not sure if you do, then you need to reevaluate. If you do having a loving relationship filled with respect and kindness then you can think about moving forward in your relationship.

Resources for Overcoming a Broken Heart:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

The next episode is about what to do when you hate yourself.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Lust Invaded Breanna’s Relationship: EP 4

How to Stop Lust from Invading Your Life.

In This Episode:

Everyone who’s currently dating or hopes to have a relationship, needs to ask themselves this question… Am I allowing desire to take over my relationships or even my life? Lust is extremely powerful and often misunderstood, causing all kinds of confusion. Some people get caught up in the excitement and have no idea where it’s going to take them or how dangerous it is.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

The effects of lust can have lasting effects on you and your life. Breanna’s relationship fell apart after she decided to have sex. Have you had a relationship fail because of lust? Maybe you’ve lusted after something, like money, food, beauty, sex, etc. I hope this episode helps you see more clearly where you may struggle with lust so that you can begin to deal with it.

Resources for help with lust:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

The next episode is about how to know when you’re in love.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Jacob’s Broken Heart: EP 3

How to Overcome a Broken Heart.

In This Episode:

When it comes to relationships, one of the most asked questions is, “How can I overcome a broken heart?” If you haven’t had your heart broken yet, there’s a good chance you will. To be in love is to be vulnerable to the other person so if they want to hurt us, they can. The deeper the love, the deeper the hurt. All this pain begs for an answer, what can you do to fix or mend a broken heart? If you follow my advice, I’m convinced you will heal more quickly and more deeply. In this episode, I will give you 6 ways to help you overcome a broken heart. This episode also includes Jacob and Nina’s story of heartbreak. They will both get through this and so will you.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

It happened…you opened yourself up to love and got hurt. You’ve been left heartbroken and vulnerable. The hurt is powerful, we are not going to pretend otherwise, but you can overcome. It’s only when we feel our pain that we are honestly able to deal with it and move on. You can move on past this hurt and find healing for your heartbreak.

Resources for Overcoming a Broken Heart:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

The next episode is about lust.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Christina’s Father Hunger: EP 2

How to Find Healing From the Damage of Fatherlessness.

In This Episode:

Father hunger is a lack of sufficient fathering which is extremely impactful to a person’s life for good or bad. I will explain to you how you can heal from the damage of an absent father. Then, I’ll give you practical ways to deal with father hunger, including powerful, “I release my father from…” statements of forgiveness. This episode also includes Christina’s story and how the lack of a father in her life affected her. You will hear my advice for Christina, which can be applied to your life as well.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Perhaps you can relate to father hunger in your own life. Have you let a negative relationship with your father define you? Have you held onto anger and resentment from times he’s hurt you? Or maybe you’ve done things you’re not proud of to try to fill the void, left by not having a father. It’s taken a lifetime for you to get to this point and healing will not happen overnight.

Resources for Father Hunger:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you like this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

 

The next episode is about dealing with a broken heart.

See you next week and whatever you do, Never Lose Hope!
Dawson

Abbie’s Love Addiction: EP 1

What Does It Mean to Have a Love Addiction?

 

In This Episode:

“So, Dawson, what does it mean to be a love addict?” I’m glad you asked. A love addict is someone who seeks to maintain a relationship, no matter how unhealthy or one-sided it may be, in the hope of receiving love and acceptance. A love addict almost always has deep emotional hurts somewhere in their past – wounds of which they may be unaware. They believe, often subconsciously, that only a consuming relationship can heal that hurt.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Perhaps you saw yourself or a friend of yours in the story we just listened to. Maybe you’re realizing for the first time that you need to take some steps to get healthy.

Resources for Love Addiction:

Would you consider doing something for me?

If you liked this episode and think someone else might too, please share it on Facebook and Twitter.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

 

Next Week’s Podcast is on Father Hunger.

See you next week and whatever you do, Never Lose Hope! 

Dawson

 

The Dawson McAllister Podcast

Podcast Launch

Dawson recording his podcast with headphonesI have some very important news for you. After 26 years on broadcast radio, I have decided to move everything online. I am creating a new show, called The Dawson McAllister Podcast, which is available on my website, TheHopeLine.com.

Here’s a brief intro to my new podcast:

I am going to take a deep dive into a different topic each week; such as, love addiction, mother abandonment, depression, what to do when you hate yourself and more.  I will choose some of the best calls from past shows. Then I will add new thoughts designed to help you understand your own struggles, and help you make good decisions going forward. I also want your questions, comments and opinions to be part of this show.

Now listen carefully because this is important — I will be sharing all the details on my Facebook page, and my Twitter and Instagram accounts. If you’ve liked my Facebook page or you follow me on twitter and Instagram, you will get all the info. If not, now is the time to connect, because I really want you to join me in this new adventure.

Dawson McAllister