Breakups are Messy
Getting over a breakup: it’s never easy. But it’s even harder when it’s a bad breakup with a lot of messy emotions. I’m sorry you’re dealing with something so painful, especially during an already difficult time.
I hope that I can offer you some encouraging steps you can take in an effort to get past the hardest part of your breakup and move forward towards a greater sense of peace.
How to Get Over a Breakup
#1 Be Kind to Yourself
If your breakup was full of conflict and arguments, chances are you are feeling especially wounded. I want to stress the importance of being kind to yourself as you process the comments, events, and actions of your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. Try not to
spiral into guilt, shame, or rage toward yourself. Treat yourself with the same care that you would a friend or family member going through a similarly painful experience.
#2: Allow Time to Rest
Dealing with the aftermath of a failed dating relationship is physically and mentally exhausting. Let yourself rest. Take time to make sure you are taking other important steps toward healthy self-care. Eat meals regularly that both comfort and nourish you. Stay hydrated. And try to move in ways that you enjoy. Activities like exercise, walking, hiking, or riding your bike could offer a nice release, as well as a healthy distraction from the tough feelings you’re facing.
#3: Focus on Others
One of the most important things I’ve learned about getting through a tough time is this: focusing on others helps me get out of my own head. Remembering that people close to you are also experiencing lives full of ups and downs may be a good way for you to feel less isolated in your pain, and more hopeful that you can get through this time. It’s also encouraging to people who care about you to know that you are thinking of them, too. Those bonds of family and friendship are going to be crucial to getting through a tough breakup in a healthy way.
#4: Remember Your Spirit
Your spiritual wellbeing is always a priority, but especially when you’re grieving the end of a romantic relationship. Be sure you are taking time to spiritually recharge in whatever way you can. Prayer (or asking others to pray for you), or reading uplifting verses, can be great reminders that God loves you unconditionally. No matter how hard it’s gotten, He has never abandoned you.
#5: Get Help When You Need It
Even when you’re doing everything you can to cope in a healthy way, you’re going to have overwhelming days, weeks, and seasons of life. I know that’s hard. But there is support available, and there is always hope. TheHopeLine offers mentoring to help people through difficult life issues, including breakups.
Talk to a HopeCoach today about your breakup. We’ll work with you to make a plan for greater peace of mind, healthy coping, and a hopeful future. You can get through this, and we are here to help.
If you’ve had your heartbroken, you may wonder if you’ll ever start dating again. Here are some things to focus on to help the healing process.
Your Friend,
Photo by Kinga Cichewicz
