Why Do People End Their Life by Suicide?

The very idea that someone wants to die is frightening. As a result, suicide is not an easy topic to discuss for many people. But suicide is preventable and talking about suicide does save lives. If one person can be saved from suicide by talking about it with someone, it is worth it; especially if that someone is you.

How to Handle Suicidal Thinking

Talking About Suicide Save Lives

I am amazed at the many powerful and wise comments I have received from you about suicide. I asked you to tell me why you think people contemplate suicide and you had some amazing insights. It is clear that it is usually not just one thing that compels someone to feel suicidal. You said it is a combination of a lot of things, including:

  • pain
  • loneliness
  • rejection
  • abuse
  • guilt
  • depression
  • helplessness
  • hopelessness

More than anything, I believe people who live with depression and suicidal thoughts feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want nothing more than for the pain to end. Unfortunately, they cannot imagine the pain ever going away. They cannot see the light at the end of the very dark and lonely tunnel they have found themselves traveling down. Have you ever felt this way?

Why Is Suicide So Common Among College Students?

For most students, college is a time of “firsts.” For the first time, you’re faced with living outside your parents’ home, managing your own schedule, deciding on an academic trajectory, working or taking out loans to pay for school, making new friends, getting to know a new environment, etc. Trying a new thing is always going to be a bit stressful, even if you’re excited about it. Trying a million new things all at once? Very stressful.

Without support, self-care, and a certain level of familiarity with mental health, times of transition and stress are very likely to impact us emotionally. College is a time when loneliness, hopelessness, depression, and anxiety have a lot of opportunities to take hold of you. On top of that, the typical age range of a college student (18-24) is a time when many mental illnesses manifest in patients. Whether you’re in college or not, these years are when your brain may develop symptoms of anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, etc.

Between the stage of brain development that most college students are in, and the stress level they’re experiencing in a time of high expectations and constant change, it’s no surprise that suicide rates are especially high within this particular population.

So what can you do about it? If you or someone you know is headed to college, get on the school’s official website and explore what kinds of resources they offer for mental health. Most campuses have health centers to support their students’ needs, and many of those now offer services like counseling or support groups that are free for students. Get familiar with that resource so that if you need it, you can use it! And even though college is a busy time, make sure that caring for yourself is a top priority. Adequate sleep, nutritious food, exercise, other types of rest, and social support are all crucial elements of a healthy college experience.

Don't Believe the Lies...You Matter

It is not uncommon for a person’s circumstances or their self-image to cause someone to think negatively about themselves.

Oftentimes, people consider suicide because they are unable to find any reason to make living worthwhile. They think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control. I believe first and foremost; hopelessness is a serious spiritual problem rooted in lies and faulty thinking. Anytime you believe lies that depression and suicidal thoughts tell you about yourself, you are listening to the wrong voices.

Jennifer said suicide has been a daily struggle for the past nine years due to being sexually abused. "I feel like suicide is the only option I have left, the only chance at peace I'll ever have. I just want the pain to stop. It's as if something will always be missing and life will never be quite right." There is no denying that the pain of sexual abuse can be tremendous. But the abuse is not Jennifer’s fault. She needs to find the hope that she can overcome this pain. Many people just like Jennifer have overcome abuse by talking about it with a professional counselor. She needs to learn how to stop punishing herself for her abuser’s actions.

Reach Out to Talk About the Pain...Never Give Up

Have you ever gone through something so painful you were convinced the pain was never going to go away? Many people who contemplate suicide say something like: I don't want to die. I just want the pain to stop. They think, "Because I’m in intense pain today, I will always be in pain." It is this kind of faulty thinking that can lead people down the path that leads to suicide.

Kas wrote: I think about suicide pretty much every second of the day. It seems like it's my only choice anymore. I know it's not the answer, but at times I just feel like I can't move on with this life anymore.

Substance Abuse Magnifies Suicidal Thoughts and Behaviors

If you are already living with suicidal ideation, it is important to remember that substance abuse only works to magnify these thoughts and behaviors. Alcohol makes depression worse, impairs thinking and judgment, and increases impulsivity. There is no safety without sobriety. Additionally, coping skills like alcohol, drugs, and self-harm, all fail – because they never address the actual root of the pain. They only serve to temporarily cover it up.

Jordyn wrote: Some people have suicidal thoughts because they want to escape the isolation, pain, and rejection from the environment surrounding them. Others simply feel they have reached a state of loneliness and depression in their lives to the point where their thoughts become so negative, that they can't find any other reason to live. They would rather not confront it because of the fear of hurt that comes along with it. I feel that when you go through times of depression and think about suicide, God is there by your side. He will not abandon you. It is only a matter of whether you reach out to Him through prayer that you will be free from these thoughts.

Mandy also wrote: "Part of the very reason people do what they do is because they have failed. Suicide is the result of irrational thinking in the illness of DEPRESSION. And when people reach that level, just as my father did on the 18th of January 2020, it was a reminder that even the strong fall... "

Depression is a real illness and needs real meaningful help. If you're thinking, "I just want the pain to stop", let us help you. To learn more about depression, please read this guest blog from our partner, Centerstone.

TheHopeLine Team
For over 30 years, TheHopeLine has been helping students and young adults in crisis. Our team is made up of writers and mental health professionals who care deeply about helping others.
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443 comments on “Why Do People End Their Life by Suicide?”

  1. Me and my ex broke up. I gave so much of myself and he no longer wants me. I feel like I'm the one that messed everything up and feel like he's not coming back. We've been on and off since 13. He has so much of my heart but he doesn't want it and I don't either. Sometimes I think about standing in the middle of the street and allowing or hoping a car to hit me. He blocked me from both his facebooks and everything. It hurts so bad. He's never coming back. I want to die so him and everyone else that I cause stress in will be so much more happier.

  2. There are days that i feel tired and fed up, i live alone, i have son 32 years old married with one daughter, my fear is how will be the life of my son and his family when i will die. My son income is so small and not stable, that is always bothering me, i have small income too. I am still hopeful that everything will be fine someday, i always do planning how to make more income. I used to have good income before, I am always thinking the future of my grand daughter she is the only one that makes me going and i am very afraid to die, very afraid to leave them unstable, life is struggling and fighting. Be strong just think of your love one.

  3. Please hang in there! Your kids need you. Create a supportive environment (church, pastor, friends, counselor) around yourself to help you get through this trial. You are going to be stronger on the other side of this and your kids are going to thank you for hanging in there for them. If you need to chat online with someone, please contact one of our HopeCoaches today - http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ We are here for you!

  4. Right now I'm at a point of hopelessness. I don't see an end. I've dealt with a cheating wife n using my kids as pawns to do wrong n go to places to cheat. She emotional abused n from time to time got physical. Then to put the nail n the coffin she had the guy she was cheating with at her job try to set me up to hurt me while dropping my kids off. But it turn out the way he may have convinced her he could cause he lose the fight he started. Then she n him call the police on me n lie. So now I'm facing a criminal charge. Then digging deeper she goes n puts a protection order against me n I haven't seen my babies in over a month. All I hear is that my kids keep wanting to see me. Then she takes my kids n moves them an hr away to the same guy house she tried to set me on n this same guy uses racial slurs. I've been at a point of just letting go and even had the tool to do in my mouth crying writing a final couple letters to my babies. And I think after I finish the last letter n hand to my attorney. That will be the end for me. I've been destroyed n have no hope or will to live anymore. After all I've been thru I lost my first child during this season to rsv. Now losing my two kids to a just wrong person with no morals. All I've ever wanted in life was to have my family n give them the life I've never had. And all is lost now. I haven't told anyone my plans. But this is something I seem I can't handle n I feel if God is still there he is ignoring my prayers

  5. Im a young muslim teen, Ive moved in east london since the past 2 years i feel like im changed, i feel like ive been influenced bad on the environment here, i feel like i dont get the freedom to stay out late, i feel like life sucks. Everytime i do something i always think about boys, i know im not a slut but deep inside ive done alot sluttish stuff and i always look for the opportunity to flirt with boys, i feel like im such a cheap object, as i am muslim and i know ive done alot sin and wgen thinking of getting better i just give up. I cry myself to sleep thinking of how those girls get the freedom. My parents are strict they dont let me out, dont let me have social networking opportunities. I know itsva stupid reason but for me it feels like freedom is impossible in my life and getting better aint me

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