In my blog How to Stop Lying I listed eight things you can do to help break the bad habit of lying.
But I don’t just want to give you tips on how to stop lying. I want to motivate you by giving you two very important reasons WHY you should stop.
Top Two Reasons You Should Stop Lying
First of all, NOBODY wants to be friends with a liar because liars can’t be trusted, and they hurt other people with their lies…often in order to protect themselves. If you desire any REAL relationships in your life, you need to be trustworthy.
Second, liars will eventually get caught, and deservedly so. Lying is a destructive force and it will catch up to you.
In fact, I want to use the rest of this blog to help protect people from liars. Below is a list of a number of signals to watch for if you think someone may be lying. It’s not going to be completely possible to know every time someone lies, but there are definite signs that should send up a red flag.
Ericka told me about some of the pain caused by the lying of her ex-husband: I have two young children (3 & 1) and just left their father because he was addicted to gambling. I always thought that cheating would be the worst, but I soon discovered that along with gambling came lie after lie. Our relationship was never going to improve without trust. Discovering his lying earlier could possibly have saved Ericka and her children some needless pain. Would that be possible? I believe it is possible by figuring out how to know if someone is lying.
Lying is a stressful behavior, and it causes people to act differently when they lie.
We’ve all seen people take lie detector tests on TV or in the movies. It is an effective instrument, not because it can tell right from wrong, but because it can reveal when a person’s body is reacting in a stressful manner. Because lying is so wrong, it can cause stressful behavior, showing signs we can detect through body language.
It is important to learn to read body language. How does a person act in normal circumstances? Notice normal eye, hand and body movements, and facial expressions during regular conversation. Then you will better notice when the body language changes…showing the stress of lying.
One of the easiest and best ways to tell if someone is lying is by looking into their eyes. Most people who are lying have a difficult time holding eye contact with the person they’re lying to. Jenna agrees: It is hard to tell when people are lying to you. But in my case, I found that when someone is lying, they don’t give you eye contact.
8 More Signs Someone May Be Lying to You:
How to Catch a Liar:
- A lying person may become tense and freeze up while telling the lie. Others may move their body way more than normal.
- A lying person may appear uncomfortable fast eye blinking, scratching, itching, swallowing hard, fidgeting, etc.
- A lying person may look up and to the right.
- A lying person may touch their nose or cover up their face or mouth.
- A lying person may often raise the pitch or speed of their voice.
- A lying person may present a wide-eyed, innocent look.
- A lying person may create noticeable pauses in the conversation as they are trying to come up with something to say that fits the lie they are creating.
- A lying person often tells a different version of their original lie the second time around.
You’re not always going to be able to discover if a person is lying to you, but usually if it feels like a lie, it almost always is.
My desire is to help both those who lie and those who have been lied to. I care for you equally. So, it is my hope that if you are in the habit of lying you will stop and think twice. Know that your lies will ruin friendships and you will eventually get caught. And if you believe you are being lied to, trust your gut and confront the person you believe is being dishonest. It will be best for both of you in the long run.
sometimes when my cuzin tells on me she gets really mad then ..we would yell at eatchother.......one time my cuzin told on me an said that I be hitten on my little cuzin.......then she told my aunt that I be popping my butt outsiie when I dont...and I told lies on her alot..an now I feel really stupid an. now I just wish could take it back cuz now I tell things outside of my house and thats not right.....an my auntie cant trust me like that no more so now all I can do is pray...
I always lie about the stupidest things. I find my self creating story's about what happened in my life which never did. I lie about the stupidest things which don't require me to lie at all. For example yesterday i went to the hairdressers to get a trim before i went back to school and when i wasn't thinking i asked the barber for a grade 1 on the back and sides (for the girls who don't know a grade 1 is like basically shaven balled), i normally get an engraved parting too which i asked for and my parents have no problem with. When i left the hairdressers i realised that my haircut was ridiculously short and i had 4 days before i went back to school, anything short and stupid as the trim i got would normally result in a suspension from school. I decided to spin a lie and tell my parents that the barbers hand was nudged when he was shaving the back of my neck with the grade 1. Thankfully my mum was out (Who i'm scared of because she can read me like a book and knows when i lie and is well quite a shouty person). My dad was home and he is very mellow and we get on great, I told him the lie as i knew he would believe it as he supports me in the many arguments i have with my mum.
When i realised i was lying i quickly called my mum and told her that the barbers hand was nudged and that i wasn't to blame for the almost baldness on the sides of my head. when she got home from work (she knew i was lying) she asked me several times what happened to see if the story would change and if i wanted to admit which i didn't !
Eventually my mum drove me and my dad to the barbers and asked the barber what happened. I knew i was screwed because i didn't tell them the truth when my mum gave me many opportunities to admit to my lie. Thankfully the barber who cut my hair wasn't there but his boss was. The boss called the barber who cut my hair and I tried winking at the boss so he knew i was lying and i needed to get out of this. He understood but he couldn't lie to a customer (which he told me when my parents drove off and left me at the barbers). So the boss told my mum and dad that the barbers hand wasn't nudged and i did indeed ask for a grade 1 on my head. My parents were incredibly embarrassed and the boss offered to write a letter to my school telling them that it was their fault for the mishap with my haircut (Which my parents didn't accept). When i walked home they shouted at me for two hours telling me how disappointed they were in me as i lied straight out to them and i didn't tell the truth once. I'm now probably facing suspension in school until my hair grows back. I feel like i've let my parents down and that i have used my dad. i'm doing guilt exercises to eliminate the feeling of guilt i have. I feel terrible as i have now let my dad down as he always supports me in the arguments i have with my mum. I don't know why i lied in the first place as it would have been so much easier to tell the truth.
I can't stop lying ,I lie to cover up things, but that was just the start, Know I'm even makeing up story's even if I don't have a thing to hide , I just can't stop I lie to ever one I make up fake secrets ,story's about my life I without having too please help is there even hope for me?
there is hop for u I starting lieng at 12 years old and I felt stupid now im 15years old and I got worse u have to pray and try not to do it agin
I hate the fact that I have no real reason to lie about things. I don't usually have anything to hide, yet I feel the need to lie anyways. Take last weekend, I was a bit late coming home from a friend's house because we were eating supper and finishing watching an episode or two of some TV shows, but when my mom asked why I came home so late (I was supposed to be back at ten, I came home at nearly midnight, I said we had a hard time getting the car started up. Now I just feel like an awful person.
i have been lying to my girlfrend soo much now i wann to quit lying to her cos we married now
I know this feeling , I lie to my girlfriend so much , yet I know I love Her. Its not her , it's just my stupid habit of lying , even when I don't even have a problem to lie about