You may think it doesn't happen in your city or in your school, but it does happen...in all communities. You may think it would never happen to anyone you know, it could only happen to a runaway girl who is willing to sell her body, so she doesn't have to go back to an abusive home, to a drug addict, or to a foster child with no one to watch out for them but it doesn't discriminate, it exploits all types of people from all different backgrounds.
An organization called Unchained was established to provide education and awareness that will motivate and mobilize communities to join the movement against commercial sexual exploitation of women in the United States.
Here are some myths and misconceptions that Unchained has published to help educate:
Sex Trafficking occurs in every city and community around the U.S. People believe that even though they live in a small or safe town that this would not happen in their communities. Not only are brothels found in small towns, but children are also at risk of becoming victims in small towns. Because of modern-day technology, the internet has exposed a greater number of youth to potential predators.
they meet in chat rooms, social media groups, etc.
The belief that your child could never wind up in this lifestyle is a dangerous mindset. When we ignore the dangers and are not proactive in educating our kids, we leave our families unprotected. Communicating with kids about the dangers of internet predators and teaching them the warning signs of unhealthy relationships will be the best defense you can give to your family.
There is a misconception that the girls in this lifestyle are choosing to live this life. While there is a very small percentage of women who claim that prostitution should be legalized and that women should be able to make a choice, the reality is that the largest percentage of women do not choose this life. In truth, they are forced by a trafficker, or they are desperate and feel that they have no other means of survival except to have sex for money.
Although we do see drugs and prostitution as going hand in hand, many victims will express that they never used drugs until they were in the life. Some traffickers force their victims to use drugs to keep them working day and night without a break.
Others say the traffickers give them the drugs to emotionally cope with the trauma of the life. We also see that young girls will use drugs to self-medicate, which increases the difficulty for them to get out of the life.
One of the hardest concepts to understand about trafficking is why girls would choose not to leave their traffickers. Traffickers use different techniques to control their victims. Victims are threatened that if they were to leave, they would be found, beaten and killed. They also threaten to harm their family and friends. We also see many victims who develop trauma bonds with their traffickers. Victims who experience these trauma bonds are more difficult to work with as they do not self-identify as a victim.
Young girls and women involved in prostitution suffer many psychological and physical consequences of being in The Life. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is one of the most common psychological disorders treated with victims of trafficking.
Some studies suggest that victims of sex trafficking suffer more severe PTSD than soldiers returning home from war. Young girls and women involved in prostitution have a mortality rate 40 times higher than those not involved in prostitution.
It is true that girls will have quotas of 500-1000 dollars a night for their work. This could wind up being over $150,000 a year. However, what people do not realize is that 100% of their earnings are turned over to their trafficker/pimp. These girls work every day for 10-14 hours a day and many times receive very little food and rest. When the girls do not perform, they receive verbal, physical and sexual abuse.
Money that girls do earn is short-lived by either continual incarceration or drug abuse. Our experience has been that the victims will always leave the life the same way they enter, with nothing except the psychological damage that will take years to recover from.
It's true that many girls who are in this lifestyle dress promiscuously, but many times these girls are wearing everyday clothes, jeans, hoodies and tennis shoes. We need to remember that this lifestyle does not discriminate and will exploit everyday people who come in all shapes, sizes and colors. When we assume that victims will look a certain way, we miss out on opportunities to help potential victims.
The media culture has given us a new idea of what a pimp is. Main-stream hip hop has given the term pimp a new look and meaning. A pimp is a man who has lots of money, nice cars, and is surrounded by beautiful women. Another typical stereotype of pimps are men who are dressed in flamboyant clothes and carry a pimp cup or pimp cane. Pimps are real but they do not fit those stereotypes. Pimps can be both men and women. They are young and old and represent all races. Pimps are traffickers, men and women, who prey on vulnerable individuals. They psychologically or physically manipulate the victim to have sex for money.
Some pimps use psychological manipulation to control their victims while others use physical force to keep their victims under submission.
If you want to help someone who is a victim of sex trafficking, it is important not to put yourself in harm’s way. If you suspect trafficking is happening in your community, call National Human Trafficking Hotline toll-free at 1-888-373-7888.
Here are some signs to identify a potential victim of sex trafficking.
If you suspect that someone you come in contact with is being exploited, then you can report anonymously and safely to The National Human Trafficking Hotline .
For 24/7 CONFIDENTIAL HELP Call 1-888-373-7888 ( TTY: 711)|*Text 233733 |Live Chat
You can report VICTIMS, TRAFFICKERS, or SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITY.
Growing up I was not immune to the many issues teens face today. I experienced depression and cutting as a way of coping.
It started out as depression that just kept getting worse and I started to feel nothing, so much to the point where I would cut just to feel again. I hated everything about myself, and I just didn't care what happened to me. I didn't want to live. I had low self-esteem, I hated the way I looked, and I hated living. I felt invisible and lifeless. I started getting depressed when a lot of my friends left and betrayed me. My family and I have been taking care of my Papaw for quite a while and having my "friends" betray me didn't help me any. I started having anxiety attacks, and my depression throughout the year just kept getting worse. Cutting was the only way I felt alive.
I would try to switch the negative with the positive, my whole mirror was filled with encouraging Bible verses and song lyrics, I tried to tell myself I was beautiful every day in the mirror even though I didn't believe it...at first. It may not sound like a lot, but it did help.
When I tried to cut myself the last time, I had hit rock bottom, I tried and tried and tried and no matter how hard I tried to cut myself, the blade wouldn't work. I kept asking God where he was and if he was even there and that was my answer. After that night, I started putting my trust and faith in God for the first time, in a long time.
And I started to feel again, I felt love and joy again, I could actually smile. Not the fake smile everyone saw. The mask was gone and the real me was there. My family helped me to keep going. When I wanted to end my life, they are what kept me going. I didn't have friends at that point, I had family. I kept trying to hold onto what friends I thought I had, even when they betrayed me. I never realized that God was what I really needed and that being alone wasn't all that bad. I felt free finally.
There is HOPE! It may seem dark now, but the day will come again. Even in the night there is still a light that shines brightly till the break of day. You don't have to fight whatever you're dealing with alone, there are people who understand and are willing to help. All you have to do is reach out. TheHopeLine is a great resource.
I always sang, but I had stage fright. I still do, some days are worse than others, but I push through. The kids and the people that come up to me after I sing are worth it. I've always wanted to inspire people to be kind and to go after their dreams even if they sound impossible. 🙂
My Pappaw used to play a lot of bluegrass when I was little and he played a lot of instruments.... guitar, fiddle, mandolin, and banjo. I know rock and bluegrass are pretty much opposites of each other but he got me interested in music in the first place, that and my dad, he has a pretty huge library of music.
I also turn to God's word. My favorite verse is: "But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint." -Isaiah 40:31
If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm, check out TheHopeLine's free eBook.
My mother was losing her mind. And I had no idea how to deal with it. On one hand, I hated her for not being strong enough to deal with something like this. On the other, I felt bad for hating her and wanted to do everything I could to save her.
I actually stumbled upon this website looking up ways to commit suicide.
And I am so glad I did. I connected with a HopeCoach and she listened...just the way I needed her to. At the time I was sitting in front of the computer with a bottle of Promethazine tablets in my hand. The HopeCoach was so understanding, and she helped me to look at what I would be leaving behind if I died. It was an incredible thing she did for me. She even prayed with me.
The Hopeline saved my life!
Thank you!
-Mya
You too can chat with a HopeCoach from our Get Help Page. Or if you or a friend need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, for free confidential, 24/7 help. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world. For additional help, please visit the suicide prevention resource page.
On May 5th, 2014, I got into a relationship with a United States Airman. I had known him for over 6 years as a friend and we had dated a couple of times before that. The month before we got together, I was in a relationship with my best friend from high school. We were together for 2 and a half years. The relationship I and he were in was heading downhill. It got to where I took care of him, he wouldn't get a job, and wouldn't take care of himself hygienically. So, I started talking to my airman. We talked while he was stationed at an undisclosed air base. I was 700 miles away. We were talking and I realized he was grown into the shoes he wears, and he was everything I wanted. I didn't want to leave the relationship I was in, but my airman told me he would always love me, and that he wanted me in his life and that he believe he could truly make me happy. I never stopped loving him from the previous relationships and I knew he was who I wanted, but I was the one breaking up with him in the past relationships. So, I made the choice to get out of the 2-and-a-half-year relationship. However, my airman was afraid to tell me that he was given orders to deploy to Afghanistan for 6 months in September. He thought I wouldn't want to try a relationship again. I cried after knowing that, but not because he hid that from me. I was afraid for him. He wanted to know if I could come help my best friend Mel (who was living with him at the time) keep the apartment they were staying at. It is hard enough to keep an apartment with a full-time job paying minimum wage, but she was only part time and wouldn't have a change to keep the apartment after he shipped out overseas, so I agreed to move down there, get a job and help her keep the apartment. I finished up my 3rd year in college and didn't enroll for the next year.
So, May 1st rolls around, and they leave the airbase, driving 700 miles back home to visit family and friends. They surprised me by showing up at my house that night. They had birthday gifts for me that I didn't know about. My best friend got me a dragonfly necklace and the guy I was talking to at the time got me a pillow pet baby seal that glowed in the dark. I gave the pillow pet the nickname Jumbo, due to his large size. They told me they were still 3 hours away, then they pulled in my driveway twenty minutes later. My best friend snuck into the house to get me, and I ran outside and jumped in his arms, giving him a big hug where I missed him. 4 days later, he comes to see me at my house, and we talked and talked for hours just lying in my bed. And he asked me to be his girlfriend. I was ecstatic and said yes.
So, May 14th rolled around, and we got all my stuff packed and got me moved two states away. I was happy to have someone to fall asleep next to, and to cuddle at night and not be so alone anymore. As time started going by, we got intimate, which was the only thing we had in common. He liked staying on his computer, and building computers, and working on his personal server that he kept in the apartment. I enjoyed talking and companionship, but I enjoyed being near him more. As September seemed to get closer, I was getting worried about him leaving for 6 months. I was so in love with him and didn't think I could last a day without him.
Mid-August comes up, and he gave me some news about his deployment. His orders were canceled. He no longer had to go to Afghanistan. Needless to say, I was happy. I was happy because I wouldn't be alone like I thought I would. I cried again, but with happiness. More months go by, and we started arguing more, because I wanted to have 'talks' with him, explaining that I felt emotionally neglected because he didn't want to spend any time with me. I was working two jobs by this point. I almost never got a day off from both jobs, and when I came home at 8-10pm after being gone since 7-9 that morning, I wanted just five minutes of alone time with him when I came home. He wouldn't hardly give me the time of day when I came home. He stayed on his computer and done things that made him happy.
Time continuing, he decides to buy a house after having two noise complaints at the apartment he was staying in, so we all started looking for houses. He found the perfect one and decided to buy it. November started becoming a stressful month, and it got to where we didn't do anything anymore. We never went on dates anymore. He wouldn't go with me to Walmart, because God knows I don't like being alone in big places. But at every opportunity, I was going with him wherever he went just to get those 5 minutes I wanted. When he wouldn't give me the 5 minutes I wanted with him, I would stay up until 2am just to be awake when he comes to bed so I could remember the cuddles he would give me that night. And I had to wake up early to go to work. It was worth it to me.
December rolls around, and I am constantly reminding him that I want more time with him. He felt that we had nothing to do together anymore except be intimate, which bored him after a while and which I yearned for because I got time with him. We finally get into a final argument, and he broke up with me.
I spent hours crying in the bedroom, begging him not to do it. I begged him to come to bed with me and hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay, but that night he slept on the couch. I cried until 4am. I texted my mom and told her I wanted to come home more than anything. I cried until I couldn't breathe and cried until exhaustion caused me to sleep. I woke up that next morning as he was getting ready for work, and as he put on his uniform, I wiped my eyes again as they started tearing up. Many thoughts crossed my mind at the time. Why now? Why break my heart after I move 700 miles away for him? Why break my heart after convincing me to break up with someone and promise me that he could make me happy? He started to head for the door to leave, and I said to him "I love you," and with a distasteful sigh, he looked back at me, and said "And you know I love you," as if he were tired of saying it. He would always say "I love you" before going to work, but that morning was different. It was saying to me "I love you, but not 'in' love with you,"
That day, I decided to go back home. He told me I was more than welcome to stay, but my heart couldn't do it anymore after he said that if I stayed, there would be no more kisses, I love you's, or intimate moments. I asked him to do me one favor to keep my sanity at least until I could go back home to my family. I asked for 3 good days. I asked for 3 days of hugs, kisses, and I love you's. He said he would do it for me. I had hoped that during those 3 days of packing my stuff, hugging him, and kissing him would make him realize that he still loved me. It didn't work and only hurt me further. The night I left was 5 days until Christmas. He helped me get packed and loaded my stuff into my mother's car. My mother and aunt got into the car, and I hugged him and cried harder than I ever cried before. He told me everything would be okay. Maybe after I learned to base my happiness on my life rather than on him and made something of myself then maybe we could try again.
I finally get home after a 13-hour drive and unload my stuff into the house. Since that night, I've went to bed every night crying and contemplating on how my life is going to turn out. I can't imagine my life without him because I put all of myself into the relationship. If I was willing to move away from my friends and family to come help him and be with him, then I must have loved him. Not a day goes by that I don't think about him, and the happy times we shared. It's hard to go through my phone and see pictures of us. It's hard to go to town and see the same red truck he drives. It's hard to go to bed and sleep on the pillow he bought me and to smell him on all of my blankets.
I had been thinking on ending my life. Not saying that I was going to, but I was thinking about it for reasons beyond my control. It's been 3 weeks since the breakup and I'm falling further down into a depression and going on these downward spirals to where I can't think straight or think at all. I just want my humanity turned off. I don't want emotion ruling my life.
So, for a few nights, the thoughts of ending my life came on stronger and it was not what I wanted to do. I didn't want a permanent solution to a temporary problem. So, I started doing research online and found TheHopeLine®.
Here, I was able to chat with a Coach, who suggested that I take care of myself before this depression gets any worse. And the amazing thing was, he/she gave me advice that no one was giving me. They were telling me stuff I already knew and stuff I needed to know. Maybe getting help is the best solution for me because doing nothing will make this worse.
While I was waiting in line to talk to the HopeCoach, I was in one of my downward spirals, asking God "Why am I hurting so much? Why do I think about him all the time? I just want this pain to end, I just want to live life happy again." At the end of the chat, the Coach asked if I would like to pray, and it was there that I believed God wanted my suffering to end. He wanted to guide me out of this dark hole long enough to find one of his people who he calls on to help others. He wanted me to know that he was thinking of me during this whole thing. If it were not for my dark thoughts, I never would have searched for help, and I wouldn't have found it.
God led me to the Coach that I chatted with, and from there, both of them have helped me through this ordeal.
I can only hope and pray that it can get easier here on out. Thanks to anyone who is reading my story.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I may not see it yet, and you may not yet either, but God loves you, and he will guide you through anything. God bless you and have a safe year.
-Sarah
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I have been on my own over the Christmas period. Since it was Christmas, my counselor wasn't working so I was on my own for a whole week. I was in desperate need of a reason to live. The HopeCoach I talked to, calmed me down and helped me find the Lord again. We said a prayer together and the HopeCoach spent all night with me from 9 at night until 6:57 in the morning. No other help line does this, so...THANK YOU! And thank you so much for saving me!
-Rebecca
If you or a friend need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, for free confidential, 24/7 help. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world. For additional help, please visit the suicide prevention resource page.
