Are You Mad At God?
I've got to believe at some point in your life, you've raised your fist and shouted out in anger at God. Most of us have done it.
Maybe your parent died, or you had a friend get seriously sick, or even killed. Maybe you have cancer, or some kind of handicap. These and other serious issues enter our lives, making it easy to target God for our pain.
Someone described anger this way: Anger is a human emotional response to situations that are either out of our control or out of our ability to understand, or both.
Have you ever wondered why we get so angry at God? That's what I want to talk about, because I can assure you that while God allows us to cry out to Him, He doesn't want us stuck in rage towards Him.
What are some of the reasons why we get mad at God?
The main reason we get so upset with God is that we think He owes us something. This usually happens in two ways:
1. We don't get something we want.
Have you ever really wanted a relationship with that perfect girl or guy? Or you really wanted that job you knew for certain would be perfect for you? When these things didn't work out, you no doubt found yourself hurt and disappointed. Our first impulse is almost always to blame God.
Daphne wrote: When we get mad at God it is really like a 2-year-old throwing a fit because Mommy or Daddy won't let them stick their finger in the light socket. The 2-year-old can only see what he/she wants, the parent sees the bigger picture, and the danger. When we are mad at God we show our immaturity, ignorance, and our shortsightedness.
2. We get something we DON'T expect.
When something bad happens to someone we love, or to us, or someone gets really sick, or even dies we wonder why these things have to happen. We think of God as a big genie in the sky who should only give us good things and prevent the bad.
I received a comment from someone who said: Some people wonder why their lives end up being a certain way, and they blame God for it, because if God really cared for them, then He wouldn't let them suffer.
We think, "If God is so loving, why am I in so much pain? Is He punishing me for no reason by allowing horrible things to happen to me, or the people I love, or even the world?"
3. We think God owes us something.
Both of these situations can make a person feel like God doesn't care about us. After all the prayers we've prayed, God still didn't heal your brother's cancer, or get you the job you wanted.
Joe wrote: I have to admit that I am angry at God. The more I have prayed for help and guidance, the more I get nothing. He is ignoring me. It's His right to do with me what He will, but I am frustrated because I have done what I think I am supposed to do and yet no response, no help.
We get angry when we think God owes us something. When in fact, God owes us nothing.
A couple of other reasons:
- We get angry with God when we don't know all the facts. It's so easy to think we know everything, but we can only see a very small part of the picture.
- We get angry at God when we see others claim to know Him, and then act like hypocrites. It's easy to blame God for the faults of others.
These are just a few reasons why people get angry with God. Of course, there are many more.
How to Get Over Being Mad at God - Know What You Can Expect From Him.
If we think God is going to be our genie in a bottle, and make everything good in our lives, we're going to be mad at God when something bad happens. Having faith in God is not insurance against hardships.
In the Bible, Jesus says- “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)
So what can we expect from God?
- His Peace - If we trust in Him and believe in Him we will have peace even in the hard times. Do you want to know how to find this peace? Begin Your Journey To Peace with this great resource from Peace With God.
- God Wins in the End - This world is full of sin, hate and death and that comes from the enemy, Satan, not from God. However, for all those who believe in Jesus, there is glorious, eternal life in heaven.
- His Comfort - He promises to be near those who are hurting. "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." (Psalm 34:18)
- His love - He promises His love for us. "God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him." (1 John 4:16) He loves your heart and is with you in the midst of whatever your circumstances.
- Life with greater meaning and significance - If we got everything we thought we wanted, we'd be spoiled and selfish. God is a wise father who knows what we need to become the best men and women we can be.
What can you do when you are mad at God?
1. Tell him how you feel.
The best thing you can do is tell God what you're angry about. He wants to hear from you about what you're thinking and feeling. Tell God honestly where you are at. God knows what's going on inside of you, but He wants to you be able to come to Him with honesty and openness.
2. Place the blame for evil on Satan, not on God.
God is good and Holy and perfect and loving. He is the opposite of evil. You may be mad at God because he didn't prevent the bad from happening to you, but he is not to blame for the bad thing, Satan is. Jesus says in the Bible "The thief’s purpose is to steal, kill and destroy. My purpose is to give life in all its fullness." (John 10:10)
3. Pray for courage, strength and peace to make it through the day.
Betsy wrote: I find it easiest to leave everything in God's hands and pray that he will care for me and do what's BEST for me, not what I want, but what is best. It's very hard, and I have trouble with that at times, but that is my overall goal.
4. Trust that God will use a hardship for something beyond what you can see.
So can God use everything we go through for a greater purpose? I believe He can. Ask God for understanding to see the bigger picture. Over time, you may see more clearly how God used your trial for good.
Jill wrote honestly: I feel like I have a daily tug of war with God. I know everything happens for a reason, but when you're lonely, broke, bored, and feel helpless, it is really hard to say, okay God, I know you're doing this for a reason.
Betsy echoed Jill's thoughts: After many trials, I learned that it is best to accept what God has done and believe that it is for my good, whether I like it or not.
Believing He does have a reason for everything we go through helps us to trust that something bigger is going on here, even more than we can probably understand. But I'm not God, He is. And I'm just going to trust that He knows what's going on with me.
5. Get involved in other people's lives.
A lot of our anger and frustration in life comes from thinking about ourselves too much - we think about the way things are and how different they are from how we wish they'd be.
Yevgenia wrote: One of the best things I have learned while going through this is God won't put you through something unless he knows you will be able to overcome it. Another way I have used these things in a positive way is by using my experiences to help others who are going through similar things in their lives.
The best way to find joy and peace from the hardships of life is to get involved in other people's lives. Take an interest in other people and their circumstances. Share in their joy and their pain.
6. Decide to have a relationship with God.
The Bible says the only way to know God is by knowing His son, Jesus. Jesus was basically God with skin-on and gave us a way to know who He is, His love, and how to be in a relationship with Him.
Lucas wrote: Sometimes only God will know why He has allowed a trial and sometimes He will reveal its purpose to us. Sometimes it's because He is preparing us for a greater thing. Sometimes it is to show us how little we truly love Him, and to allow us to change. Trials give us an opportunity to build our faith in a way nothing else can.
How have you dealt with your own personal anger toward God? I'd love to hear from you. Please let me know how you got over being upset with God.
It’s hard to have faith when life is hard, but God understands your pain. For more help read this blog: Life is Hard, God Understands
For more on reconciling the goodness of God and bad things in the world read these blogs from organizations we partner with:
I wouldn't say that I am mad at God, just completely disappointed with Him. I understand that God knows what is best, but I can't comprehend how God's complete lack (none) of involvement in my life is good for me. I gave myself to God through Jesus over 42 years ago. In that time I have never heard, seen, or felt anything from God. Nothing at all, including having zero prayers answered. This is a hurt that can't be blamed on Satan. Satan can't stop God from being involved, only God can stop Himself. God is responsible for His own actions or lack there of. The pain of God's silence and absence tear at my soul everyday. I don't know how to be ok with this nothingness from/of God. Thanks.
God bless you, through the Holy Spirit, in Jesus holy name, Amen.
I am Angry at God and I am NOT forgiving Him for what 'He has allowed.'
I was suppose to be Famous and performing in the Arts.
Because someone was jealous God allowed me to be tormented and allowed everything to be taken. This person wanted be embarrassed, in pain, bullied, picked on and tormented. Because I continued to fight and refused... God did allow me to have my career.
So ****** your Judeo-Christian God. He failed me. Why should I suffer because a spoiled rotten brat, can't always get His way? I became a Christian eventually but found out who God truly is... I did not hear what God wanted me to do... so I stopped Him and told Him *****!
Hello Bear,
We wanted to let you know that we do not post blog comments on the weekend when our moderator is off. That is why your blog comment was not posted.
We moderate blog comments because we do not want people to be hurtful to each other.
We understand your pain and hurt towards God and wanted to let you know that we do care about you. That is why we are here. A lot of people come to us that have been hurt and are angry towards God because of the hurt they’ve experienced. We value what you have to say and we do offer free online chat that you can continue talking about what has happened to you. You deserve to be heard and understood and one of our Hope Coaches are there to listen. To chat online please go to https://www.thehopeline.com/chat-live/.
You understand my pain. I tried many people and they give me this “God has plans” speech. As well as the laughable “Worldly-minded.” As one artist that is hated for he had artistic talent... I too have artistic talent and was literally stolen. I lost faith in God and in Christ. Until I get what I want. I want the world to know stay away from the Judeo-Christian God. When He said in His word. He is not a respecter of persons. Let’s see you “know how you (I) feel”? I developed ideas and developed countless artistic things which is a sight to see. If I say what was stolen you will call me a liar. Until I reveal key information about me, we will go nowhere with this conversation. I want people to know that the true God, is a no good liar. “He comes not when want Him, He’s a “on time God”. Well, not to my liken. I had problems about moving and experienced homelessness for the last time. So I’ll wait for a REAL GOD to show up and GIVE me what I want! Then I’ll Serve that one and let you know about it! If no God does this. There is NO God. God is dead. So much for watching those fluff-a-nutter movies. They may end being a lie and apart of your imagination!
I honestly can't stand this - "Place the blame for evil on Satan, not on God. God is good and Holy and perfect and loving. He is the opposite of evil. You may be mad at God because he didn't prevent the bad from happening to you, but he is not to blame for the bad thing, Satan is." Even in this explanation you state that you can still be mad at God because He didn't prevent it. Well fine. I mean at the end of the day the loss of your spouse still remains REGARDLESS of who's fault it is. I can say ok Satan is to blame for my wife's death but I don't care. I don't have a relationship with him and I know he does not love me. God is supposed to love me and yet he still did not prevent it. So word it however you'd like, I'm still mad at God. It can be for allowing it to happen if that reason makes people feel better but it still happened and I am still without the love of my life at 57.
I share your pain. I was abused ( I'm male) - nothing so seriously as you ,but the emotional &physical abuse was significant. I'm gay - nothing wrong with that - but I don't want to be , especially as God seems to forbid homosexual acts. I have ADHD, and EUPD, with RSD to throw in there for good measure. When I pray, God seems to respond exactly opposite to what I ask for. How many of you who are fathers, when your child asks for an egg, would give them a scorpion? Well God does! Everything I do seems to turn to dust. I have asked to die, but instead get a half-life. I should ask for life, then I might get the release I crave. So yes, I am angry -no, incandescent with rage - at God. The trite "its became we don't get to stick our fingers in a socket" is patronising rubbish! God shares our pain. Well, that is good to know, for all the good it does. Like you, I'm ready to turn my back on God. I have tried. I have scored out to Him for help. God is a cruel, unforgiving father. Cold, distant, and arbitrary. He loves who he loves and hates who he hates. Why not just not create the latter?
40, unhappily married, mother of 4. God has been my rock for 20yrs. Most of those years were lukewarm. My life has been crap since the beginning. Sexually abuse by my dad. My mom used to fight my siblings & I then brag to my aunts about it. She has mental issues. My dad was a single parent. I remember being suicidal at 12 due to the sexual abuse. When I was 14, I wanted to stay with a friend for 2wks. My dad said I had to have sex with him in order to go. I said I'll tell on him. He got the dictionary, looked up evil. He said I was evil. My older sister was my best friend. I looked up to her. She was like a mom to me even though we're 2yrs apart. She later admitted to me (as a adult), she hated me & wanted to kill me. That's my foundation. My life consisted of sex with older men. Tbh I simply wanted to be loved. I'd make friends until they found someone better. Suicidal thoughts grew stronger every year due to rejection. In my 20's I heard a voice while sleeping telling me to do God's will. That woke me up spiritually. Searched for Him, His word. I fell in love with God/Jesus. Things in my life never really changed. Suicidal thoughts, break downs, get back up, rely on faith...repeat. I'm tired. I don't expect for things to be perfect, but geez. I feel ignored, used, rejected and over looked by everyone for 40yrs Including God at this point. Mind you I put forth an effort to change my negative thinking.
Tried to walk in love. I genuinely made an effort daily to change my life for the best. Pointless.
Ready to step away from my faith because what difference does it make when the outcome is the same. This is all over the place. I've been up crying out to God. Also, my horrible backstory showed me what is actually needed to be a parent. Love, communication, guidance, discipline, quality time and praise. Raising my kids (2 are grown, 2 are teens), are the only thing I've done right.
Im really starting to question my faith with God. I feel like my life is a joke to Him. Why test my loyalty why make me go through hoops to prove that I love you what allow bad things to happen to me that is not a loving God that’s not a caring God. My life to God I’m starting to feel like is a game. This big GAME to get to heaven. It is simple logic if someone loves you they would not hurt you if someone loves you they would not allow horrible things to happen to you especially if God can foresee them if God knows everything why allow bad things to happen. How can the Bible teach to blame Satan but at the same time God is supposed to be more powerful than Satan. it doesn’t make sense. My heart is so broken. Why can’t God stop Satan. Why can’t God just get rid of Satan. You mean to tell me God is so powerful that I should trust him but yet he can’t stop the power of Satan. It makes no sense.