How Pain Covers Pain
It seems that self-harm or cutting have become as popular as drugs or alcohol as a method to cover the pain. It also seems to be destroying lives in the same way as other addictions do. Hopefully, that life is not yours. But if it is, help can be on the way. You don't have to stay stuck in the vicious cycle of self-mutilation.
What Is Cutting?
Cutting is a form of self-harm often used to handle overwhelming or negative feelings. It is a way for people to “feel” something physical when they feel numb or pained on the inside. It also gives the cutter a false sense of control since they can choose when, where, and how to cut. Cutting can lead to permanent scarring, extended bouts of depression, diminished self-esteem, and possible infection.
Does Cutting Yourself Make You Feel Better?
If you’re a cutter, you might think it’s helping you feel better about the deep emotional pain you feel. But the truth is: cutting is a counterfeit helper. It promises relief from the hurt you’re feeling, but it only ends up making the heartache even worse.
If your thumb hurts, it doesn't make sense to cut off your foot. In the same way, making yourself bleed is no way to take care of your very real emotional and spiritual needs. Cutting yourself merely covers the deeper emotional pain you're feeling. But like every other addiction, it's far too much medicine for the sickness, and will come back to haunt you.
Nonetheless, you or someone you know likely cuts for the benefits you get from it. In fact, as someone once said, for every thrill there is a chill. So, let’s not deny, with cutting there is some kind of a thrill. If cutting yourself for fun is a temptation, it's helpful to understand the toll it takes on your body and mind.
Cutting Triggers Your Body's Chemistry
The body naturally produces a chemical compound called endorphins. Endorphins are released to help the body deal with pain and stress. In fact, endorphins cause an actual high designed to cover real physical pain. And cutting causes real physical pain.
You might have heard of runners high. This is simply the release of endorphins into the bloodstream when someone puts their body through something extremely physically challenging. This high, or euphoria, is extremely addictive.
Much of the same thing happens when you cut. Your brain is flooded with endorphins, which give you a rush, and a sense of calmness and relief that makes you feel like everything is ok. Some cutters claim the high can last up to 90 minutes, but what happens when the high wears off?
Sarah S. understands this chemical dependency, after being addicted to cutting for six years. "Your body has its own pain management using hormones called endorphins. Endorphins manage physical pain, as well as emotional. When someone cuts, endorphins are released and help [cover up] the emotional and physical pain. It will make you feel better for a few minutes and then you will crash again. Eventually, your body will build a tolerance to it and you will have to cut deeper and/or more frequently and more cuts at one time to get the same effect as before."
So, in the end, cutting is rather simple to explain.
It is using self-inflicted pain to get a high, in order to self-medicate an emotional pain with a temporary feel-good. The problem is the feel-good quickly can turn to a feel bad, or worse, to an addiction.
Megan says she got addicted to the physical high of cutting as an early teen. "I started cutting in junior high because a girl who was cooler than me was doing it. I kept on doing it because it helped with my pain that I was having from school or my family, or later from my eating disorder. I'm 20 years old and I realize now that I cut for a bit of a high, but I don't have that urge to feel that high anymore."
Megan doesn't feel the urge to get the cutter's high anymore. How did she stop? One thing I know for sure, she came face to face with the consequences of cutting.
A Struggle on Many Levels
Perhaps, after reading this, you've come to the realization for the first time that you need to deal with an emotional pain you have been hiding as well as find the strength to resist the temptation to cover that pain with cutting. This might be a lot to take in. If your first reaction is a desire to put off dealing with the emotional pain, you are not alone. It's understandable that you don't want to go there. In fact, it's precisely why you've been covering it over with self-harm. But if you have come to this realization today, I encourage you to not prolong the hurt. Get it out into the open. You are strong enough to deal with it and move forward.
You can face this trial with HOPE. You are not alone. Many people do conquer their addiction to cutting. You can chat with a HopeCoach when they are available. You can reach out to our partner organization, Door of Hope. And you can turn to God for help. I know it's hard to understand why bad things have happened, but God is good and wants to rescue you. You just need to turn to him.
“Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, ‘My foot is slipping,’ your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.” Psalm 94:17-19
If you lay this struggle before God and trust him to help you, He will give you the strength you need.
"For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7
Here are more Verses of Hope for Struggling with Self-Harm.
For more help to stop cutting yourself, read my blog on how to resist the urge to cut yourself.
I cut myself but I don't get high, I get physically sick. Why? And look I'm not another suicidal try hard OK? I'm doing this to clear my head and to keep myself under control.
Lily, Cutting is a dangerous addition that can take over your life. You may be just clearing your head now, but it may accelerate to more. We have a partner that will help you with this at http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. They will help any age to overcome self-harm. They will help you understand why you feel physically sick. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST
Been reading some off the posts and it brings tears to my eyes. I am in my 50s and my girlfriend is in her 40s. I am not a cutter but did self harm with cigarette burns. My girlfriend has been a cutter since she was 8 years old. We met 3 years ago at work and became friends but she never mentioned her urges to cut to me. In Nov 2017 my girlfriend went through a bad spell and was cutting daily this is when i found out about her urges to cut..Forearm, top of leg under her breasts. I took it upon myself to help her and we spent many an evening talking about our lives and during this time (Feb 18) we admitted the feelings we had for each other we were both married at the time. In Dec 2017 she went for a walk and text me "i'm sorry...goodbye" It took me what feels an eternity to get through to her but she did answer her phone..She had took a razor blade to her wrists..I talked to her and eventually earned her trust and i talked on the phone for 50mins as she struggled home to get help and during this time i could here her stopping to cut some more and just sitting down to die.But thankfully she listened to me encouraging her to get up and walk talking her through one leg in front off the other explaining how to overcome obstacles in her way. Over the next 2 months I learned about her triggers and could tell by her body language when she was most likely to cut and I attended her hourly sessions with her Psychiatrist.We got ourselves a flat and moved in together beginning of March this year and I made up a first aid bag just for her which contains sterilised blades,sterile wipes,bandages and a letter from me telling her I understand she needs to cut and that want change my feelings for her. I would never ever stop her from cutting but because what we have been through in our lives and we are their for each other ( I'm classed as suicidal risk) she has spent many an hour in the bathroom (only place in flat she's aloud to cut) with blade in hand but never cuts because she now knows that at least one guy in her life understands.OK she has still cut but in the last 8 weeks only twice and I am very proud off her as I have seen her battling the urge to cut and believe me its hard her whole body is shaking but she manages to overcome..I will say the last 9 months have been hard lots of tears and cleaning of wounds but their is a light at the end off the tunnel and things are looking up.......OK i'm not saying it will work for everyone but in my now girlfriends case it was finding someone who really understood her and not judging her for what she was going through and was their for her no matter what....She says the urge to cut is still their but she has managed to control it rather than letting the urge control her and talking about her feelings daily she finds helps because what she wants to cut for after talking sometimes feels not so bad......all the best to you all and hopefully one day you may overcome your urges....
Wow that is what i call dedication and true love.
Idk..... I just want to feel the feeling my friend takes everyday......I mean I tell her to stop but she say's it is kind of a pain reliefer......I mean I have really bad headaches and kids at school call me gay mostly everyday I just let everybody push me around.....and I just feel sad because I don't know who to talk to about anything......I'm just not sure if I want to start cutting😢
Manny,
You are valuable and worthy! It's good you are reaching out to talk about this. We have some resources we can give you to help you with these thoughts of self-harm.
• You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
• Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
• You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
If you ever feel so overwhelmed you can’t go on, please call:
• The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255
• Or Chat with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/
• Or Crisis Text Line 27/7 by texting “Start” to 741-741
• Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many young adults we have sent them overcome self-harm.
i’m 15. i’ve probably been cutting for 4 years. at first, it was to feel something; to get the high... now, i’m not so sure. i thought i was recovering, i truly did. but once you’re addicted, it’s hard to truly come out of that rabbit hole, and i am not at all a strong person. at one point, my mother knew that i cut, though i was only 11 or 12. she assumed that i did it to seem “edgy”, or for attention. my mum has offered for me to see a therapist several times, since her relationship with my father is very on and off, which sometimes takes a toll on my mental health. i always decline. my school wanted me to get professional help for high anxiety, and i refused. i don’t want a stigma. i don’t want to be labelled. i don’t want that to be in people’s perception on me. but maybe, slightly, i don’t want to stop, either.
Does anemia helps?