Why Do Women Handle Emotions Differently Than Men

Each person brings who they are, including their masculinity or femininity, and that helps balance out the relationship.

It's always fascinating to explore the differences between the genders.

Let's face it, no matter what anyone says, men and women are similar, but yet so different.

In fact, there was a big selling book called Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus which spelled out very clearly what makes men different from women. These differences can cause so much confusion for people involved in a relationship.

Why do Guys Brush off Emotions and Close Up?

Phillip asked, "Why is it that women tend to have so much stronger emotions than men?"

And Michaela asked, "When guys get emotionally hurt, why do they just brush everything off and won't talk with you about it?"

Unfortunately, society has told men it's a sign of weakness to express their feelings while it's much more socially acceptable for women to talk about their feelings. That may be a reason why so many more men end up with heart attacks...they tend to hold everything inside.

While every person is different, women tend to be more emotional than men. There's nothing wrong with that. Each person brings who they are, including their masculinity or femininity, and that helps balance out their relationship. But while there are exceptions, it is equally true men tend to express their emotions differently than women.

Each side needs to do the best they can to understand and deal with the opposite sex.

Women Demonstrate Emotion

Women are more prone to talk about what they are thinking and feeling, and to demonstrate how they are feeling with their tears, facial expressions, hand gestures, and body language. Many women seem to be more comfortable figuring out how they feel by talking through it.

Men, generally speaking, tend to process their emotions inwardly. Many times, they don't know exactly how they feel, so they try to figure it out on their own...inside their head. Some men are afraid of their emotions and keep them buried inside in order to protect themselves from looking weak. Little do they know, that most women would accept and understand (and even appreciate!) an expression of their emotion.

Men Solve Emotional Problems on Their Own

Men are also more physical, and tend to work out their emotions by finding solutions, and doing things. The harm is when men keep stuffing all their feelings inside, letting them simmer and brew, and potentially eat away at them, eventually coming out as anger. There are tremendous benefits to getting your thoughts and emotions out in the open, in the context of a safe relationship, and not letting them destroy you.

There are differences between the genders. Each side needs to do the best they can to understand and deal with the opposite sex, rather than get frustrated about the differences. We ought to celebrate them. Just think, what if there were all women in the world, and no men? Or all men in the world, and no women? The world wouldn't be a very fun place, would it?

So, we handle our feelings differently, now how do I understand what my boyfriend or girlfriend is thinking?

Do I Have to Read His or Her Mind?

Robert asked, “I have found that girls tend not to speak their minds. Why is that? When you ask, 'How are you doing?’ They may say, 'I’m all right,’ when they’re feeling completely the opposite. Do I have to read her mind?”

I have heard that same question from both sexes. Everyone’s deepest desire is to be loved by someone who knows everything about us and still loves us!

So it would stand to reason then that our biggest fear is that someone would know all about us and reject us. So we go back and forth with someone we care about. At some moments we dare to show who we are. At other times we cover up what we think might not be met with approval.

The key here is good communication.  If you are feeling frustrated by always having to guess how he/she is feeling, or exhausted by trying to read his/her mind, try gently asking them what they truly mean. In fact, your effort to discover what they are honestly feeling might assure them of your desire to really know them.

It’s also important to express your commitment when they reveal vulnerable areas of their life. Tell them how much you care about them, and how you desire to understand them better. We all long to be listened to and understood. If you are confused by what they really mean, taking the time to ask for clarification instead of just walking away in a huff will show real love.

Are you wondering what the secret is behind a healthy relationship? Find out here.

Dawson McAllister
Dawson McAllister, also known as America's youth pastor, was an author, radio host, speaker, and founder of TheHopeLine. McAllister attended Bethel College in Minnesota for undergraduate work where he graduated in 1968, began graduate studies at Talbot School of Theology in California, and received an honorary doctorate from Biola University.
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22 comments on “Why Do Women Handle Emotions Differently Than Men”

  1. It is true that it would be either a man or a woman who has written this. Assuming gender is discrete, most of the world's population falls into either one of two categories. It is impossible to write a perfect article without preconceived notions about gender. That's why we need to discuss, instead of banding together and become tribes that lead to a worse future.

      1. What makes me think it was written by a woman is that the writer keeps saying "Men are taught to keep emotions inside and they are thought of as weak if they share". That's stupid and nobody is taught that. Boys are taught to deal with their feelings without acting out. This article was not insightful.

  2. If the both of you decide to be friends and it's ok to date others.. When your ex-bf feels like you are seeing or dating someone else it's a problem but its ok for them?

  3. why is it that men gradually change their romantic behaviors and patterns overtime; why are things always more effort in the beginning than toward the end.

    1. Men pull out all the stops to impress women at the start of a relationship as to prove themselves. Once they feel they've gained that acceptance they'll go back to a more normal (Often less romantic) way of doing things.
      That said, it takes longer for a man to fall in love but once he is, and assuming it's unconditional, he'll go out of his way time after time to help or keep his partner happy. A lot of that is down to assuming a 'protector' role, some of it however is so he doesn't jeopardise his chance of sex :')

      1. I know you were trying to to answer her questions but I'll add this applies to both genders btw.
        I think it has to do with the fact that many people put up a facade on a daily basis. It helps polish the perception you get from others. Once you baited someone, either your facade wears out or you feel so comfortable that you forget about every part of it (facade).

    2. I would say it is the law of attraction and the rule of relationship. Lots of energy, time, and money putting into it at the beginning. So it is not sustainable.

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