Dawson’s Blog

Why Do You Hate Yourself?

Do You Wonder Why You Hate Yourself Even When Others Like You?She hated herself because she thought she was not good enough

It’s so tragic to hear someone say I hate myself. But down deep, many people do. Do you hate yourself? It seems there are so many things in this world that attack our self-esteem and sense of worth. Some people, perhaps even you, are locked in their own personal jail, full of self-loathing, desperately wanting to get out, but not believing they can.

Can You Relate To Caroline?

Others may think you are just crying out for attention. But the feelings are very real.  You are miserable because of how you feel about yourself, even if it sounds exaggerated or overly dramatic. I believe you.

Caroline described her self-hatred like this: For a while I hated myself because I thought I wasn’t good enough to be in this world. I thought I was ugly, stupid, and weird. I wished I could have been someone else.

So why do people hate themselves?

We took a poll on my website, and asked what reasons you might have to hate yourself. The majority of people said it was something about their appearance, followed closely by I didn’t feel loved, and then I failed at a relationship. Each of these could be their own articles.

For now, let’s examine what I see to be some of the greatest causes of self-hate.

Blame Ourselves When Bad Things Happen

When baGirl hated herself and wanted to disappear d things happen, we often blame ourselves. It’s easy to let this blame turn into self-hatred and suck the very life out of us. This can leave us depleted of any kind of self-worth or love. When bad things happen, the worst thing you can do is spiral down into self-pity.

When bad things happen, we blame ourselves. It’s easy to let this blame turn into self-hatred. Click To Tweet

Sometimes self-hate is emotional exhaustion from the blame game. It’s important to remember that painful, challenging, and hard times are going to happen. Sometimes you just need to give yourself a break and get some rest. You will look much better to yourself when you get some rest and forgive yourself for any mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes.

Rejection or Abandonment

Everyone will experience rejection of some sort. It’s normal. But it’s difficult. Not everybody is going to love you, or accept you.

But it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, and that you should hate yourself because of it.

Not everybody is going to love you, or accept you. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Click To Tweet

Tom wrote: I used to live consumed with thoughts about what everybody else was thinking about me. I felt like people were constantly rejecting me. All the worst things came to mind, even though there was no way of actually knowing what people were thinking. I had to quit, or else I’d go crazy.Guy stressed thinking people hate him

Sometimes when people experience rejection or abandonment, they turn the responsibility onto themselves, as if they are the ones who caused the pain. Don’t let what other people think about you determine what you think of yourself. The freedom you experience when you let go of this burden, like Tom did, will give you great joy. He’s right, it’s not worth going crazy over something you really can’t control.

Related Posts:
5 Amazing Reasons Why You Matter
Confessions of a Dyslexic Pretty Girl
‘Identity’: A Chat with Christian Recording Artist Colton Dixon

Negative Self-Talk

Thinking poorly about yourself is is kind of like self-rejection. You see something about yourself that you think is stupid or ugly and you think criticizing yourself about it will somehow make it go away. It won’t. It will actually make it worse. A lot of people feel ugly. Lazy. Inadequate. It’s like the whole human race suffers from deep, low self-esteem.

Mona wrote: I hate who I’ve become. I know there is a hardworking, honest, skinny person inside me somewhere, but most of the time I think about how far to the negative I’ve come, then get even angrier at myself for not working harder to become the person I know I can be.

So what can you do to feel better about yourself?

The Fight Against Self-Hate

Guy outside not hating himself God loves himThe fight against self-hate is an on-going battle in all of us. Some struggle with it more than others. But it seems to always be there working in the shadows, waiting to pounce on us, and take us down. One thought that has helped me in this struggle is God’s love for me.

I ask myself, “Why should I hate someone God loves so much? Why should I slap Him across the face? He’s the one who made me, and He did it for a very special reason.” There is no one else in the whole world who is just like you or me. Isn’t that incredible? That person, YOU, is worth loving.

There’s no one else in the whole world who’s just like you or me. That person, YOU, is worth loving. Click To Tweet

Looking for some practical thought and advice? Check out our next post about no longer hating yourself!

Free eBook! Understanding Self-Worth from TheHopeLine®

Dawson McAllister Dawson McAllister (born in New Kensington, Pennsylvania) is an American speaker, radio host, and author. He is the founder of Dawson McAllister Association and TheHopeLine and host of the national radio program Dawson McAllister Live, which is aired on Sunday nights. Dawson has been speaking to and in support of teenagers and young adults for over 40 years.
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  • I needed this. Thankyou

  • Kris

    That’s a great point to make, why do I hate myself so much, when God loves me unconditionally. I’ll try to keep this in mind for those very dark days I often encounter….

  • nyarielee

    I really need prayer and help though
    I loved reading this it helps thank you

  • Karina

    This didn’t help me, none of the other websites did… I don’t know what to do now knowing nothing will work..

    • Renee

      praying for you Karina

  • Renee

    This was great..thank you so much for the post

  • This did nothing but state the obvious. I agree with Karina. It didn’t help. Self hate is not my only problem, but it’s so frustrating not really understanding what is wrong. What is going on in my head. AND WHY DO I HATE MYSELF?! I don’t really know.

    There, I have been social. Leave me alone.

  • No one

    This didn’t help me either! It almost felt like it was rubbing salt in an already open wound. If god truly loved us we wouldn’t feel this way in the first place!

    • No one

      And what if you hate a lot of people God loves unconditionally. Just sayin.

      • mike

        I really needed to read this I felt so alone by my self an kept blamming my girl friend for it I felt un loved un wanted u felt ugly i felt like noone was here for all becouse of my dad an mom aren’t here I blame my srlf I call my self stupid I try killing my self becouse I feel unwanted I thank you guys alot for helping me every time I feel this way imma read this thabks

  • K

    I think if you hate yourself it is important to find out why, because self hate leads to self harm.

  • Yes, it may lead to self harm or a life time of thinking those dark thoughts. For me, self hatred has lead to a life alone. I am 48 now and live alone. I’ve let most of my friends fade away without any explaination to them. Only a few persistant friends remain. I so want to be social. I grew up good at being social and made many friends but inevitably I would say something that caused an awkward silence or something that offended someone. I would be a wreck for days, filled with self hatred…Going over and over the incident in my head all the while knowing that the incident was quickly forgotten to those who witnessed it. The self hatred is magnified 10 fold when an incident involves family. My heart hurts for all of you who suffer with this affliction because I know the depths of it. For the 1st time I have sought out therapy and it does help to get professional insite. Prayers for all.

    • Dallas

      This is exactly my experience. I have felt this way so many times that it has crippled personality. I go for days without speaking. This is troubling for me, as I grew up bring very personable, friendly and well liked. I don’t know why my mind has plummeted so quickly into this self hatred. I don’t really enjoy my life anymore. I no longer make any attempt to be social. I don’t have any friends. Every day I feel hopeless. I’m sorry for the rant.

  • Junk

    It’ not self pity! I’m 55 and life has been bad for as long as I can remember! Nothing helps! Like the post from above said if god loved us he would make all things good after all these years and it keeps getting worse! I want out of this world! The pain is too intense! I hate opening my eyes up in the morning to face another day of disappointment, anxiety, depression, loneliness etc. EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE!

    • Sue

      you are not alone in feeling this way…

  • someone

    It is all here; God has given us everything we need to claim the wonderous, unique life that is you and me. I know God is blameless for my mortal failings. Even though my life is and has always been an embarassment to me I find some hope in knowing that God is rooting for me. My inner voice tells me do this thing or that thing because its the right thing, the right path but 9 times out of 10 I don’t. God has already given us everything we could possibly need to change our dark, self-damning thoughts to something more normal more productive and positive. I know the pain of self hatred. The only difference is that I don’t blaim God. I lean on him and pray for the courage to make a big change and he give me hope. Keep plugg’n along as I will. Its not over yet.

  • April Jones

    I thought this article was okay, until you started mentioning God.
    If there’s a God, he doesn’t love me as much as you claim he does, or else he wouldn’t make me feel this way in the first place.

    • Anonymous Catholic

      God doesn’t make you feel that way, April, though I understand where you are coming from. However, I want you to know that God gave us a gift of free will – the power to make our own decisions in terms of things like choosing to love and serve him, how we treat other people, and how we treat ourselves. Don’t think that I don’t know how you feel, because I do and am in the same boat as you. My advice to you is to turn to Him with your struggles. He loves you regardless of whether you decide to follow him or not. And if you ever feel alone – remember He is always with you.

  • Worthy to be loved

    I have struggled with negative thoughts most of my life, and self hate. I have have children now and it started to affect them because they would hear me say things against myself, to see my daughters cry and want for me to be happy changed my life. I have a husband of 14 years who has been by my side through my struggles. He loves me but often feels his love is not accepted because how can he love a woman so much who does not love her self. It hurts to be surrounded by so much love and not feel that for myself. I searched one day for the meaning of my name and ironically it means worthy to be loved which is something I never really felt. I have accepted that I am worthy to be loved and God has been so good to me but I have refuse to accept the LOVE He has for me . I’m learning to love the beauty in myself/ they are so many standards by the world I can see how we get caught up in hating ourselves/ so I am learning not judge myself by those standards and enjoy being me. There are many things that Love about me and the things that don’t like , but I’m tired of feeling sorry for myself I want to be free so it’s either STOP COMPLAINING OR DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT !!! Our pain is our testimony and with survival we can help someone thru they pain… may we send our love out not be returned voided

  • Thomas

    God is fictitious. Challenge him once or for the rest of your life and god will loose every single time. God doesn’t help the many that die innocently. We call it the devils work if someone innocent dies yet we fail to realize that if that’s true then god doesn’t do his job. Find peace from inside and not religion. We as people do more than any religious figure could ever do.

    • Anonymous Catholic

      I’ll be praying for you, Thomas.

  • anonymous

    I want to be someone else who is handsome who have respect all over who is rich and he has someone special who loves him very much

    My face become horrible when i see my face i hate myself nobody wants to love me everybody make fun of me in back even god not help me am i that much bad??
    Why god do such type of injustice with me???

  • ronak

    I jst don’t know what to say.. it literally breaks me down.. that.. I jst don’t kbow how to say it.. it all started when I got in a relationship.. aftr that.. it ended in an unjustified way.. I got no resn fir it.. I was broken.. I started wruting poetry and some sorts of phrases.. to drain all my pain on the paper.. in my diary.. people soon came to know about my writings.. they started praising.. now I hv got my resn of brkup.. and she is evn back.. looks lik an happy ending.. bt for the year when she was away.. I was broken like hell… and now.. evrythng seems basically ok.. bt its not.. still everything’s wrong.. I jst don’t know.. I just hate myself.. and it’s all because of “preferences” they show as if they care.. bt I just don’t know.. nothing seems good…

  • truth

    Ronak ….Its seems you’ve given all your power to this woman. You are at her mercy. Be strong…You can survive and even thrive on your own. Let her know it or end up resenting her for possessing all the power in the relationship. Stand up and embrace yourself. You are worthy of that much. And your writings; maybe you have found it. The one thing that is unmistakably, beautifully you. Keep writing.

  • moja

    Why was i in this site..i think its because i have the same problem and CAN U BELIEVE it, i am in Tanzania
    But i think most of the people are wrong (like the above) about everything and GOD
    Though i have this problem and many other as mentioned by others, i believe GOD loved us and still love us dearly
    and gave us EVERYTHING in every possible way.
    Then if so; who is to BLAME and be BLAMED?
    ITS us human being
    Relatives, friends or supposed to be friends, society e.t.c (THE WHOLE MAN MADE HUMAN LIFE, JUDGEMENT, PRIVILEGES, PREFERENCES SYSTEM)
    Think and be positive GOD knows what is best for you and when to give IT to you( your best) AND YOU ARE NOT LOOSING ANYTHING
    BE HAPPY, find and do what makes you happy and dont think much about what they say or do abot you though first it is difficult

  • Sylvia

    I have no self convince. When im walking in the halls at school I feel like every one is saying something rude about me or how ugly iam. I don’t feel pretty I im not smart, I cant do anything right. I try to make myself feel better by thinking that a some guys think im pretty but I was worng the only guys I attract are users.

    • Carl

      Chose one positive thing about your self and write it down and keep it close. Every time you feel bad about yourself read it and make yourself believe it. Change it up every so often. This is what helped me.

  • light

    when I read your post I thought…..This was me when I was in junior high and high school. I was confused about why i was filled with such self doubt and everyone else just seemed to be so sure of everything and comfortable with who they were. Does this sound familiar? At your stage in life kids are beginning to find out who they are separate from their parents. They are learning to love the little personality traits that make them unique and enjoying sharing their personalities with others. I believe that something is preventing you from seeing the unique, special person you are.
    Maybe someone close to you puts you down or maybe your blaming yourself for something that is beyond you control. In any case its time for you to move full steam ahead. Join things, volunteer somewhere, Research something you’ve always been curious about. The more things you become involved in the more life knowledge you aquire. The more you can speak about a variety of different things the more you come to know and like yourself. You certainly are not alone…….and I promise things do get better. As for the boys……just because he’s attracted to you doesn’t your attracted to him. You do the choosing not them. Oh, and one more thing. When I was young my mother always told me I wasn’t very smart. Well guess what she was wrong…..I graduated college with a masters degree. Claim your true self and your life. There is so much to look forward to.

  • Riley

    I’ve hated myself since i was in about sixth grade. I mean, I’d started to hit puberty, that didn’t really bother me, I was happy with my body but then I walked into school one day and an eighth grader called me name as I walked into school and just called me ugly and my crush was with him and they all laughed and IDK that was the beginning of it I guess. I’ve always been shy and I’ve never really been assertive. My best friend left that year for another school also and for about a month all the girls hated me and I felt so alone and I dreaded going to school i felt like sooo horrible. And then the year after that I’d gained a little weight, so I tried to starve myself and that didn’t work at all, i mean i was always too hungry to starve myself so that was stupid of me. When I got to high school I thought it would be different like different people and stuff, and it didn’t really change much. I mean, I always think to much about what others think of me, and my friend told me i’d never get a boyfriend, and I’ve never had one, no one has ever kissed me or asked me out. I felt so ugly i still feel so ugly and just stupid. I feel like i make the stupidest choices and say the stupidest stuff. My friends are only my friends when they feel like it, and that honestly makes me so sad all the time. Earlier this year it was so bad that I cried just about every night i saw no reason to do anything and I felt like people were being so mean to me at that time, but then closer to summer IDK what came over me i started to feel so much better. I felt so much better that I didn’t even notice how better I’d gotten. Every time I’d cry at night earlier this year I’d pray and ask God to help me feel better about myself. And I got better and I didn’t even notice until July and I was like oh my god i haven’t cried in forever and that felt so good! Nothing was worrying me, and now I’m starting to get back into what and i was earlier this year and I can’t imagine ever feeling 100% about myself. Especially now that I’m going to go off to college in two years. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do for a living I kinda suck at everything :/ lol no really like i’m bad at stuff.

  • Linda

    I’m new on here. I have hated my self for as long as I can remember. I am 54 now, when will this get better.

  • mcgooch

    Hi, I have never done this before but I need help. I hate myself and it seems to be getting worse. I’m in an amazing relationship and my boyfriend loves me. But I think he’s too good for me. I think well I know I’m fat and ugly. I go to the gym and I wouldn’t say I’m the biggest girl in the world but that’s all I see when I look in the mirror. I don’t know what to do. It’s killing me everyday. I’m getting to the point where I don’t want to be here anymore.

    • Anonymous

      Instead of focusing on why you think your boyfriend is too good for you, appreciate the relationship you both share. Think about it, if he’s your boyfriend and if he feels the same way about you that you do about him, why does it matter if he’s too good for you? There are also a ton of girls in the world that would love to have a boyfriend like you do, so just remember that if out of all of those girls he has feelings for you, then you must be special.

  • Sey

    i hate myself more than anyone all i can do is cut myself so i know im at least doing a good thing, hurting myself because i deserve it,

  • tammy

    I have good intentions. I compromise. I love. I laugh. I learn. I accept. I appreciate. I am treat like a doormat. I am ignored. I am abused mentally, physically and emotionally. I am constantly ripped off by people promising the earth. This has been going on for 30 years. I do not ask for this. I do not manifest this. I do not pray for this. I now have no money, home or relationship. I have a 2 year old I cant look at because of my inadequacies and she is a major reminder of them (her dad was the only one who ever loved me. I was with him for 2 glorious years. He died when I was 3 months pregnant, never seeing a scan or her face). She is confused. I am suicidal. I am good at explaining my feelings, only for them to be ignored. I know I am worth so much more, but life and others seem to differ in opinion. I have had enough. I cant breathe anymore. I cant look in the mirror without crying. I am so tempted just to give in. I just dont want to leave my daughter on her own, as an orphan and in the system. Cheers for this. I know you mean well, however sometimes it is too deep, painful and constant to face, hence the self harm, the self imposed guilt, the self imposed abuse. There is a saying that everyone cant be wrong. Everyone thinks the same about me as I do. they have their standards for me which differ from mine and I fail to achieve anything other than negativity, oppression, vile comments and physical punches, just for being me. My daughter sees all of this and I can do nothing to stop it.

    • way

      Your are not trash. You are not stupid. You are not ugly. You are not invisible. You are not worthless. Your life is beautiful, wondrous, spiritual and imperfect by design. You are perfectly unique and your life, a gift not a curse. With such a precious gift we must protect it….So if you are as low as low can be then look up and reach, claw, drag your way out. Research therapy, meditation, acupuncture, yoga, bible study and what ever else you can think of that could help to deliver you to a place where you feel genuine love for yourself .. Meditation helps me. Go to a peaceful place and watch the sunset tonight and reflect on the beauty that is in you and around you. So long for now

    • ondela

      Tammy how r u now. I relate so much. There is no one who wouldve put it better that u did. God is by our side my sister,We r under Gods watchful eye. Take a deep breath and come down now, it will all be ok. I’m just holding on to that, faith! U and I are exactly in the same both. This is not our battle to fight.

    • Ag

      Tammy you are not alone, in this world there might be people who ignore you and abuse you,  but there also those who will listen to you and love you, like the father of your daughter did and people like me and others who have read you’re comment. I don’t know where you are, we may be worlds apart but I hope you know I care what happens to you. I wish I could express myself better, some how my words seem shallow.

  • Massimo

    I prayed for all of you and will continue. We can overcome this.

  • Marissa

    prayers and good thoughts would be greatly appreciated right now.

  • K

    For all the postings of despair and hopelessness there are just as many postings from people praying and trying to reach out to help. For those of you who feel so hopeless, what has helped you to make it on your darkest days. For me it helps to see myself as a little girl struggling to make her way in this cold cruel world, and I feel compassion towards her, I don’t hate her. She is doing the best she can with what she knows. We don’t have a road map, so how can we hate ourselves if we have made a few bad decisions? Life goes on and we can still make a difference and help others.

  • SomeGirl

    So how can I overcome my hatred?

  • K

    Would you hate the younger you? The little 8 year old you that only wants to be loved and accepted? Are you angry at her?

  • Linx

    I’ve hated myself sense around when I was in 1-2nd grade. It happened it was out of my control. I couldn’t stop it and didn’t know how to stop it. I started growing up, hiding and repressing feelings of all kinds besides select few. Hate, anger, and rage. It fills each and every day, my depression makes it all worse. I haven’t had a wonderful life, but I haven’t had it as bad as others, causing a whole new level of guilt. This has lead me to numbness and partial insanity, which I can lose the rest quickly. I have a wonder boyfriend, we are long distance and that already kills what is left of my corrupted heart. And it makes me feel terrible that I can’t really give him what he wants or deserves, our words hurt eachother even if not meant that way. He knows about what happened back when i was younger, but i feel like he doesn’t understand. He became my light and has helped me start to feel some good things again. He just doesn’t see what somethings do to me. I continue to hide hideous feelings from myself, from him, friends, and family. Some of these comments fit so perfectly it hurts. And the kind words others say are nice but hurt even more, because I can’t fully accept them and knowing I can’t accept love hurts so bad. I recently came out as a victim. A small part of me wants to be loved, and could maybe just maybe accept it. But how can someone love you and how can you love someone if you have held hatred as number 1 in your broken heart for so long? My religious view is so confused and mixed I don’t know what to believe in. Gods love or not I haven’t felt loved ever sense I can remember, but saying this I don’t know what love is. So I don’t know if I have ever really felt it or not. Thank you have a good day, it just feels nice getting that out…

  • K

    You are too cute. “A small part wants to be loved and could maybe just maybe accept love.” That is where it starts-with that small part. Your heart is not corrupt. Just a little broken and it can heal. You were abused, but that does not define you. Allow your heart to open to life. It is like getting into the ocean….you start with one foot, then the other, then before you know you are up to your calves, then thighs, then stomach, chest, neck, and before too long you are swimming in those waters that initially seemed so cold and uninviting. Allow yourself to be loved. Start slowly, start with that small part and allow it to grow. You are worth it.

  • Cooper

    Why shouldn’t I kill myself?
    I feel selfish doing this, as I have not taken the time to help others. And I don’t want help or feel I deserve help myself because of that reason. But here it is.. I hate myself. Every aspect of myself. Why do I want to end my life so badly? Why do I have such bad anxiety? Why would I rather pick at my skin and think hatred thoughts about myself and life in general, than go and make something of myself like the rest of my family and society. I’ve always liked to draw and paint and sculpt and I thought I was the best, and I still have materials to do so within reach. I used to play basketball and soccer and loved getting better and just doing it. Now, I won’t get up and put a pen to a piece of paper, or walk down to the courts and shoot. I get anxious even thinking about the activities. And when I do finally force myself to hold the brush and set up the paints and make my first few marks.. I hate it.. I suck.. Why am I even doing this? I push all of that shit aside and cry.
    I have shunned my family, I feel I am a disgrace to them. I don’t wish to reconnect with any of them, nor do I feel worthy of their attention or acceptance.
    Day after day, I starve myself only eating when I feel I will collapse, and sometimes just letting myself because I want to sleep more than anything so why give myself the energy that will prolong consciousness. I get anxious thinking about the fact that I need to get up and eat something. I won’t go to the grocery store because I do not want to be seen. I don’t deserve food.
    And now I’m complaining on the internet…. I hate myself.

  • K

    Hi Cooper. Based on the symptoms you describe, I wonder if you suffer from clinical depression. I would encourage you to see your doctor and get a complete physical. Some depression is related to chemical or hormonal imbalances that can be easily treated with medication. There is nothing wrong with getting treatment for a mood disorder, particularly one that has so negatively affected your life. You might be surprised how good you feel after getting the treatment you need. You may become energized in the mornings and start to feel alive and enjoy life again. Suppose you had an accident and broke your leg. You would be in pretty severe pain. Nobody would fault you for taking medication to ease the pain and have surgery to get your leg fixed. It sounds to me like you are truly suffering and I want to encourage you to seek treatment. Some depression is situational and brought about by circumstances. But if these feelings you describe, including a loss of interest in activities you used to enjoy, not wanting to get out of bed in the morning, not wanting to eat, etc….if these symptoms have been going on for several months, then you may have major depression and perhaps speaking with a therapist and medications may help you immensely. Once you start feeling better, you may find the joy you once had in creating your art. But please don’t strive to be the best or reach some arbitrary level of “perfection.” Do it because it brings you joy and makes you feel fulfilled. Others will feel your energy. Be encouraged.

  • I am not religious. I believe in nature. The way we understand nature is science.

    All of these comments… I am ashamed in humanity, society, culture, and myself. I feel like societys structure has not evolved, and is trapped by money, greed, and incompetence. I cannot live up to medias standard of beauty with my genetics. I will never be a size small or be able to change the structure of my face or body without unnatural forces. I find it so hard to stay healthy in this instsnt satisfactory and oh so convenient lifestyle. What am I even doing here? I cannot live in the moment, I cannot get things dons because I am dreary for the future and regretful from the past. I have searched for my niche… My home…my companions. I keep being told confidence comes from success. My only passion is useless in today’s society, other than doubtful entertainment. I dream of a world with compassion and closeness. When I was 13, I realized how cruel the world could be, how society has directions for success, how cookie cutter life can be. Smoke stained gray. I told myself, this is a huge world, kid. I’m sure there’s a way to make it my own. To own my life. To assert happiness and express my passion, creativity, and love. I’m 24 now, and I’m still looking. I’m in college doing what I’m told to do for a sustainable life. I’ve tried all the shortcuts: drugs, camping, moving. I cannot shake this cloud that dampens every environment I step foot in. My mind plagued by pharmaceutical drugs. Why can I not be happy with simplicity? What am I even suppose to be doing? Working? For what? For retirement? If I’m lucky, a decade of freedom when I’m too old and weak to enjoy it? That decade will be gone in a blink and my life will never be remembered. Another mass grave without roses. I want to be apart of something. Valued, appericated, unique. I think I’m ready now to become earth and let my electrical energy collide with… Something… I hope… I am un reassured as my hopes, thoughts, and ego are all physical aspects of tissue in my brain.

    I am angry I cannot appericate what I have either. I have all the resources but no motivation. I’m just waiting…. All I live for is for others now. But mostly my dog.

    • Don’tForget

      I think you have reached your conclusion that nothing in life is sustaining, satisfying, or wonderful. Childhood fantasies were crushed…which is sad. Don’t give up. There is more to life. Valuable, appreciated, and unique. A world of compassion, closeness. And mercy–but the base is love. It’s in God. Find Him, and you find what you’ve been looking for. Life has meaning again.

      I know you said you weren’t religious. I’m praying for you and hoping that you come to find your root for true happiness and meaning.

  • sheila

    My god, Cooper. Your words describe so accurately a place I once was; a place I fear someday I’ll return. I get it.
    I know how the emotional pain can be so intense it actually hurts physically. I know the strange fear of going out and being seen by people….Its like, being afraid that someone might acknowledge your existence. I remember how sleep was my only peace but the guilt I felt over sleeping all the time made my soul ache. I decided one day that maybe taking a drive to my favorite spot (the beach) would lift my spirits and it did. I went to that spot every day for a couple weeks and slowly I started coming around. …But that just me. I wish I had the magic words that would lift you up. Through all the self hated and sever depression I was in, I did know deep down that I was worth something, that I my life had some value and I hope deep down you know that too. You know you need help. Please reach out to someone. I’ll be thinking of you.

  • f0x

    @crinkled moth – your comment describes how I feel almost to a T, although I’m 18 and realized the world sucks a bit later than you did. I was supposed to start college this year, but I withdrew at the last minute because I feel like I’m only going because I’m expected to. I don’t even know if it’s what I want to do with my life.

  • ftw

    I’m 41, I have a bad back, bad hip, weight of 350lbs and in pain always. I’m on 2 different depression meds (that don’t work). My physiologist said after these two there’s nothing more to try, that was 5 months ago. Yet still I can’t stand me! I think of suicide all the time. I don’t want to die, but know how much better it would be just to have it over. I don’t want to be this way!!!! I don’t want to think this way!!!! Sometimes got to give. I know that suicide is not the answer. Just cause I think of it, don’t mean it’s what I’m going to do, cause I also know it’s not the right or smart thing to do.

  • K

    You guys got to, you have to re – engage in life. I would encourage you to listen to motivational books and tapes. There are so many podcasts out there that you can listen to on a daily commute or a walk outside. Life is about challenges. They make life exciting. Doing something you have never done before. You can wake up tomorrow and say “I’m gonna be that.” Or “I’m gonna do that.” Then do it. What sort of things did you love to do when you were a kid. Ask yourself what was it you enjoyed about it. Was it running? Did you enjoy feeling the wind rushing in your face? Was it acting? Did you enjoy being on stage? You can visualize the person you want to become, then set a plan in action to do it. It is said that the best cure for anxiety is action. So after you have seen your doctor, got your medications, and been medically cleared for what you wanna do, then go about doing it, and don’t believe anybody that says you can’t. You are the only one who can stop you. Break out of those boxes you have put yourselves into and go forth with gladness!!!

  • Deepika

    why i this world there is so much sorrow especially in my house in my life what to do i have no courage to commit sucide what i do i want to go out from this environment but nobody understands me and do not allow to escape me what to do tell me please my life is hell.

  • ftw

    It easy go some one to talk about getting out and doing something about your life when there’s nothing wrong with ya. But me I can’t get out and run, like I said my back and hip are messed up. My big thing when I was younger was ridding a 21 speed bycycle cross country, but now I can’t get on a bike without hurting myself, I tried about 6 months ago and every peddle was to painful to enjoy.

  • K

    Oh no, ftw…I did not mean go out and run. I have had surgery on my back so I cannot run, but I do try to walk regularly. Sometimes my back hurts even when I walk, but then I slow down. I said be sure to see your doctor and get a medical clearance before you do anything physical, cause you do not want to hurt yourself more, but I just recommend listening to motivational audio books or podcasts that you can do while you exercise or drive in your car. It helps to listen and get encouragement daily because life can be challenging, but we need to reach out and not suffer in silence. I am glad that we can connect on this website. Sharing our struggles helps other people. We can utilize our gifts, like art and writing to share ourselves with other people. And as we do this, we feel better because we connect with others.

  • Savannah

    There are manh reason I hate myself.. And I might as well explain.
    1. Faces.. Everyone has different faces whoever they are but in public I dispise mine.
    2. I screw up everything in my life, relatioships and friends and always doing the wrong thing at the wrong time.
    3. I’m butt ugly. Everyone I know has someone close to their heart and well I’m just me. Somedays I prefer it to be that way but other days I can only blame me as the problem
    4. Deep down inside of me I feel this little bit if evilness and meaness that I want to let out but I often know that is the wrong thing.. But it lets itself one way or another so adventually I screw up the things and people that mattered most to me.
    5. I’m very stupid.

    • TheHopeLine Team

      Savannah, We want you to know you are loved and that you are beautiful, smart and worthy! Please call or chat with a HopeCoach that cares anytime 24/7 at 800.394.4673. If you want download our free app to your phone to chat, call, email and get encouraged here is the link to download it. http://thehope.dm/thlmobileapp

  • stacy

    I feel your pain.

    life sucks, I am in horrible pain, and I feel pathetic.

    suicide is never the answer………………you may end up somewhere worse

    I wish you all the best

    all we can do is try to have better tomorrow

    • Sj

      Please stop saying these things about ur self u are none of those things if other people say that they r def not ur friends and u need to walk away ( talk to the hand baby) u are not a silly person why are u believing all this about ur self u and I don’t even know each other a good phase I hear all the time not sure I think if fits but anyway It worked for me last time don’t know why ( MAN UP )in the nicest way don’t let them get u down.

  • nikki

    I am 20 but people say that I’m still like a Kid.I am a College goer and i’m studying Science.subject That I’m Studying Is Quite Difficult but when I had began I thought I would do it anyway.I would work hard for it but the things didn’t go as i planned.I have a very low confidence and whenever i turn my book and start to study at home,I will be prisoned by all the thoughts filled in the world…I can’t stop my mind from wandering…during school i used to be a bright student,looking back at that i always took challenging subjects,thinking i will get back in that track..but this is not happening…my confidence is going very down and thats why today in exam when teacher asked me simple questions ,i couldn’t answer….not because i didn’t know but because i had been feeling very down…..i felt myself to be an alien infront of her…i’m sure she might have thought that i am the most weaker person in the whole college….i am feeling so humiliated i cant tell you…i have become a dumbest person in the world….my brain’s negativity stops myself before i try to hard work and that ultimately leads to humiliation….quitting subject is not an option because I have come really far…and my low self esteem is not letting me to raise….i think i will reach nowhere in my life.. 🙁

    • K

      Hi Nikki. You might want to clarify what you mean why people say you are “still like a Kid.” It may be that there are issues coming up in your like now that you are older that were never dealt with before and is affecting your studies. You are smart and bright, but maybe there are emotional issues that cannot be ignored or covered up by “working hard.” I would encourage you to speak with someone you trust or perhaps a school counselor about whatever issue is causing you to feel “humiliated.” I think it is deeper than not being able to answer a question in class. I hope you are able to resolve this because you can definitely have a bright and happy future.

    • Sj

      All I can say is life sometimes is crap
      We all. Have it hard sometimes I’m nearly 40 and life still stucks please don’t give up though I came on this site really needing something or someone to make me feel better about myself u know what that’s not happened but I’ve read so many of ur sad emails all of u young with all of ur lives to live that now I feel I want to help inspire u
      My life has not been easy
      But I do have a grt hubby and 2 grt kids although all of them are my symptom of my angrer! Please forgive me for that
      But I read most of ur comments and ur all at least 10 yrs younger than me and I want to encourage u all to keep going life Is crap a lot of the time, friends are crap most of the time, family is crap most of the time, but somehow u get through all the crap to achieve ur goal. please keep going

  • looser38

    I have endless health problems, a dead end job, no partner, no friends, low self esteem, and social anxiety. But I still believe God loves me he gave me 2 beautiful children and IM STILL ALIVE!!!!!!!

    • K

      Hi. I was wondering how severe is your social anxiety, because I was thinking you might enjoy volunteering in some capacity at your kids’ school or maybe joining a support group with other people that have similar health challenges as you do. It may help you realize just how much of a blessing you can be to others, allow you to meet other people, and raise your self-esteem.

  • hopeless

    So many people in pain like me… Makes me hate my life even more that I dare feel pain when I know there are others worse off… My problems seem minescules compared to some people… Then I have thoughts of why bother posting here so many comments, no one will hear you… Then I feel guilty for being so selfish… Then I think well I will probably never even come back to check if anyone replied and then feel guilty about that.

    I miss my kids so bad but I dont even think they would give a toss if they ever saw me again… They’re only young and dont understand… Having a great time… And I am glad about that but would like if they missed me but then I feel bad about that cos just shows how bad a person I am! How selfish I am… Then I think should I even be here, would they even know if I was gone… Would they care, I honestly dont think they would.

    Life is a terrible mess for me… I mess everything up, always have… As a kid I remember thinking that when I am an adult it will be great cos no one will pick on me and I can do what I like etc. Nah, still sucks… Now my kids have gone I have nothing, no-one… Just emptiness everyday… Empty cupboards and desperation… I’ll even lose my home soon… Be on the streets… Something to look forward to ay…

    I cant kill myself though, far too much a coward for that… It’ll hurt and I am weak… Maybe it will get even worse and I will have no choice… But even then I dont think I could…

    Atleast I am not alone in my misery… I know why I hate myself… Its because I suck so bad at life. At everything…

    • Anonymous

      I completely understand you…
      I want all of this pain to stop, but I’m too much of a coward to actually kill myself. I’ve tried though…
      I’m only 16 years old and I have no idea what to do with the rest of my life.
      I used to have ambitions, big dreams, but now I have nothing. I know that we’re all far better off than kids in Afrika, who don’t even have one good meal per day and I feel horrible and selfish that I act the way I do.

      I hope you know that you’re not alone…

  • self hater

    How am I supposed to like myself or not think I have a problem when I can’t even figure out how to talk to my wife about relationship.

  • self hater

    Nothing like waking up on a new day and still hating yourself. I love my wife & children but I deeply hate myself.

    • Jason

      I lost my wife because of that same problem. She found another man who she can communicate with. I suggest being honest with your self. write those things on a paper and bring it to a therapist and either read it to them or let them read it. Because as a guy seeking help is different than babbling about “feelings”- and how can you seek help if you can formulate out loud your emotional needs? That’s why I said to write your thoughts/feelings/emotions down if you can. For me my Ex did not understand that it wasn’t that I didn’t care about communicating or that I wasn’t in love with her. I later found out that I wasn’t able to formulate out loud my emotional needs. I’m not alone. You are not either. Most guys where a mask to hide their true emotions from an early age.We get it stuck in our head as young kids that crying is for girls. If you get hurt you better not cry or everyone will laugh at you or the ” Only women talk about their emotions”. From then until now we are still that little kid that is afraid to cry and express emotion. I’m not anymore and the next women I bring into mine and my daughters life will be lucky to have such a sincere man by her side. If you don’t get help now you wife will leave you and then you will feel true sadness on a whole different level that you have now. I never write on these message boards man let alone know how I even got to this site. Maybe I was meant to read your post.

  • Jack

    I look at everything here and it makes me think about everything I’ve been through. I’m only fourteen and my parents are divorced, both remarried, and my mother has turned to God and away from me, and she can’t realize this. For years my cats were the only source of my happiness, and now they’re gone because my stepbrother is allergic to them. I constantly think about dying and how I don’t care about living anymore. A few months ago my parents called the cops on me due to a mental breakdown and I was sent to a rubber room in a nearby hospital.

    I understand I’m not alone. I see everyone’s problems and I grieve for them. One of my friends is suffering from a horrible case of suicidal behavior and I can’t make her understand just how much she means to me. I read some of the things above, about how people thirty or more years older than me with children are suffering from this and I know that maybe someday that will be me. I’ve devoted my life to trying to save other people from my fate and I just wish that everyone understood me when I told them how much I love them. I hate the world but love everyone in it. Convoluted, huh? Yeah. But that’s all I have to say, at least all I can say without breaking down again.

    • Gary Smith

      Thanks for sharing Jack. It feels good to help others….because you value that. You have a big heart. Why is it easier to care for others…than care for ourselves. I don’t have the answer. I should research that. But…I know that’s true with me as well. I do know that it’s important to care for yourself. And…with practice caring for yourself, it will lead to compassion for yourself — which will make your life more fulfilling. Life isn’t supposed to be all happy times. That’s not the way it works. But we really aren’t taught HOW to deal with sadness…hurt. So you….and others on this forum….are NOT ALONE. Being happy is easy. However, coping skills to deal with our own sadness is so important. We can’t really help others as well (one of our values) if we don’t care for ourselves. And why shouldn’t we care for ourselves? We are alive…a miracle. We can breathe….feel…touch….see…hear. Just a matter of sitting back — and Observing these things we take for granted everyday. As I mentioned to Jane above…..try putting your hand on your heart — and say…I Love You. Do that Every Single Day. You ARE important. You DO matter. Even if only for yourself. Follow your values. In that way, even if you stumble, fail……it will be okay….because you will be doing what you value. For me, I value being a father. I don’t have the best relationship with my oldest daughter. It hurts. We were close when she was younger – but my ex in leaving the marriage….manipulated her. I text and call her everyday. She doesn’t always answer. It hurts. But I do it everyday anyway. It makes me feel good. And….when she does text or call….I soak it up. Enjoy every word. Caring for ourselves, I believe. Takes practice. Sadly/Wrongly/Most of us aren’t taught this skill. For me, I had to read about it. And I try to help others. Because I hate seeing people in pain. I know how it feels. And I don’t like being alone. So I write. Maybe no one will listen. But….maybe they will. Care for yourself Jack. You are a miracle. There’s ONLY ONE YOU…in this entire WORLD. WOW.

  • Jane

    I feel like a constant failure. I was the prime target for my mother’s emotional abuse in our home. She openly favoured my brother, even to this day – I’m 45 years old. I had to meet all of her demanding expectations, otherwise I was shut out and denied affection. My mother never believed anything I ever had to say, and she would always believe others over me. It was easy for my brother to blame me for stuff and my mother would punish me (because she always believed him… according to her, all I ever did was lie).

    I married a man who was abusive. I divorced him and he used the kids to continue wielding his abuse for the past 15 years – always holding me accountable for his problems and constantly looking for proof that I was the problem in everything (especially in our marriage)… and trying to convince our kids of the same.

    I married a 2nd time and my 2nd husband dumped all his emotional angst onto me, too… and so did his ex-wife. Suddenly, I found myself being blamed for all of their problems, too! After 6 years I left the marriage. With that, my 1st ex-husband used my “failed” marriage (as he called it) in his court papers to try to prove (yet again) that I’m the problem in everything. To this day, he continues to set-up situations whereby, if I don’t do what he wants, he uses it as an example to our kids that I’m “difficult” and that they’re not getting what they want because of me. My 2nd husband and his ex-wife did the same thing.

    I feel like a horrible parent. I have done my best to protect my kids, but I was alone in trying to protect myself. My mother was of no help in this regard (she was one of my abusers) until I ended up in the hospital after a suicide attempt – the 3rd attempt in my life. The 1st time she didn’t know about (she just would have made me feel bad about it anyway). The 2nd time, a friend of mine called her to let her know I was in the hospital and she told my friend that I was just looking for attention and hung up on her – she didn’t even visit or check up on me after I was released. The only reason she became concerned the 3rd time, was because my 1st ex-husband waited 3 days to let her know I was in the hospital, and when he spoke to her about it, he told her I was crazy. Something about the word “crazy” set her off and she rushed home from her trip. My mother tells everyone my business.

    My son is angry because of my 2nd divorce. “I” ruined everything for him. It didn’t matter that my 2nd husband would actively ignore me for weeks and sometimes months on end… I took away his family by leaving. My son is now into drugs and continues to demand that tolerate his behaviours (in my home). I kicked him out. I simply can’t deal with it anymore… and somehow, I already know that this, too, will be blamed all on me. He will blame me. His dad will blame me. So what’s the point?

    My mother accepted any responsibility for her abuse on me. I was trained to take the blame… and so the only way I know how to stop the pain of the blame-game, is to cut people out of my life. Funny… my 1st ex-husband ridicules me for that, too!

    I feel like I’m here on this earth to be everyone’s target, so that they never have to face themselves. But where does that leave me? It leaves me feeling worthless and suicidal.

    Thank you for listening.

    • Gary Smith

      Thanks for sharing Jane. I’m so sorry you are sad. I can relate very much as I just went through a divorce…child custody battle…dealt with emotional and financial abuse. It’s hard. Sometimes you just have to love yourself…to help yourself…and others. Put your hand on your heart, show compassion for yourself, say to yourself — I love you. Its a miracle that we are here. No doubt about that. Find peace in the everyday miracles…your body…all of the wonders around us…by just observing. I used to hate giving my dog a bath. But now I enjoy it. I try to soak every pleasure in. And…when people say rude things….blame me…etc….realize that the words themselves can’t hurt you….if you don’t let them in. Imagine yourself in your car, it’s raining, the raindrops hitting the windshield are those blaming you…uncaring words…now turn on your wipers — SWISH them AWAY….Seriously…try that…with practice…it really works. Then….when alone…and you realize you didn’t let those words bother you….SMILE. Love yourself. You are a beautiful person. In my divorce, I have regrets. I apologized…I didn’t want my marriage to end. I pleaded. But after a while, I realized there was nothing I could say or do. It hurts. But, I care about my two daughters. It hurts that they are not with me full time. But I try to enjoy every moment with them. My oldest daughter can be rude at times. It hurts. But she’s 17….really not mature yet. She will learn. I will try to lead by example. Love yourself. Soak in all of lifes pleasures. It won’t be perfect. You will still hurt sometimes. We all do….everyone does. But as we get older we can appreciate even more all the miracles around us. Also….forgive others. Believe me…this is hard. But you are doing this for yourself. No, it’s not easy. Its something to practice constantly. But its worth it. A better more satisfying life….by caring for yourself….is worth it. God Bless and Good Luck Jane.

      • patti

        I work for emotionially abusive people . I’m a home health aide. I try to be undertanding because the adult daughter high funtioning special needs but if anything goes wrong the daughter points the finger at me. I does make me feel like i am a kid again getting blamed for something i did not do. I have another job never got a promtion but the pay is good . I feel like a failure. Sometimes i wish i were dead or someone else. Both my jobs are part time. I am trying to find full time or another part time to get out of the aide job

    • Alana.

      Dear Jane.
      I don’t know if you believe in God or not but He loves you no matter what you or anyone else thinks about you. I too have suffered my adult son turning on me for my faith in Jesus. The enemy ( Satan) will do all he can to make you feel worthless. That’s a huge lie! When you accept Jesus as your Lord of your life He accepts you warts and all. He is healing me after years of abuse and I know He longs to do the same for you too. I have finally surrendered everything in my life to Him as I can’t do it in my own strength. It probably sounds like a cliche but give it all to God and trust Him to see you through. He will do it! Don’t let anyone make you feel like you’re worthless cause you’re not. Please read Jeremiah 29:11-14. God has a plan for you Jane. Do you really think He would want you to take your own life? No way! He sent His Son Jesus to die for you He loves you that much! ( John 3:16) Hang in there Jane! Give it ALL to God. Your fears doubts low self esteem your family hopes dreams- surrender it all in faith and trust and see what He will do! I mean it Jane. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. God wants to turn this all around for your good and He will if you let Him! God bless you! Alana.

    • Who

      Jane, sugarcube, even though I’ve never met you in person, I think you are a women worth fighting for.
      And if I ever meet your “husbands” I’ll give them the finger and ask them why in the name of all things good did they want to hate you.
      It WILL get better soon, I promise.

  • maha

    i feel so guilty if my frnd asking doubt to other person in front of me no one can speak wit me properly and i feel so bad about my studies so i hate my self so worstly.

  • sany

    all the tym i feel im not study properly..even i take book to study my mind nt to set for studies but my inner feelings told study study study

  • mariannd

    I used to be a social butterfly when i was young, but now at my early 20s, i became more and more undocial person, its just like im too unconfident to start a conversation, and when they start it, i tend to answer them shortly, thats it.. i became more and more afraid to open myself to others.
    I dont see any major flaw on me, im not ugly, my grade at uni is good, i myself really dont understand why it happen

  • sophie

    I don’t have single thing to be unhappy about. But i am empty on the inside. I have a husband and two kids who all say they love me, but i feel nothing but guilt i can’t reciprocate. I accepted Jesus as my savior, and the following year and a half was good. but for the last 14 yrs i have hated waking every morning to another day of not enjoying anything. It does not compute with me. I know in my head i have everything cause i have Christ in me, but why so empty feelings al the time? I just want to go home/heaven. Then my husband can find a wife who can love him from the heart and my kids will get a chance at seeing what joy in people actually looks like.

    • J

      Feels like me…
      I feel like I fail/suck at life..right now im meant to be at my little brother’s birthday thing. Im hiding at home.
      Why do I suck at life…

      • Beautyinthebroken

        Let me tell you…. You are a prize possession I don’t know you but all I want to say is I love you. Jesus adores you. Like life is so ugly and it hurts soooo much….. But I know for a fact you are going to shine brighter than all the people on the planet. Make your years worth living because we don’t know when we die. Idc if you want to die, what happens when you regret not making life amazing. What do you have to lose living every second likes it your last?

      • Rob

        change the question and change the outcome; Why do i suck to; Why can i do this. help yourself instead of hate yourself

    • Johnny Bravo5713

      Dear Sophie, I feel you were telling about the past 14 years. There were some great times for you in the past and i’m sure in your childhood. The guilt you have is due to some reason which you alone know and you cant even tell your husband. I’m guessing and i might be right or wrong.You don’t have to answer me that. I faced a similar situation like you in my life.Its as if my life was limited to the 90’s.Those were the best days and after i grew big in 2000’s i was just like empty.You just live because you have to.That’s what it felt like. But the responsibilities you have to take care of them.Even felt like ending my life.Meant no anger to others.but felt the same like you. But i found the purpose in my life. Its great you have accepted Jesus.Ok ask yourself one question?

      Why are you mother of 2 children and wife to the one particular person in worlds population of 720 crores.. After hearing that you’ll feel life even negligible. But the truth is God put you there in that exact place to take care of your husband and those two gifts God gave you.And not 1 out of 720 crores other than you will love them like you nor take care of them.Even if you’re miserable inside find meaning for your life by laying your life for them rather than yourself.”Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13

      Do that by taking care of them everyday

      And you wanna go home/heaven then this life is a probation period/assignment given by god for you to complete.So finish it with distinction dear.

      Read your Bible,Pray everyday & take care lovingly your husband and your 2 angels.That is your purpose and redemption dear.

      Read the book”The Purpose driven life by Rick Warren’.Buy it online and read it for sure.it’ll defintily help.

      And in the end as a co believer i wish you all the best sister and May God Bless You.

      Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee.Psalm 55:22
      Bi dear


    • jkvolfan

      Its amazing reading these blogs, it seems there is more to this self loathing and procrastination and depression.. its more than just having a bad day or a bad month. Im approaching 44 and i have felt this way since i was a child. I feel sorry for the people i love having to put up with me. I have always been a hard worker and have been successful. Nothing seems to change im “happily” married and all i do is bring my loving wife and family down. I dont know how to change. I try with no avail. I have put on that face for many years and i dont know if i can continue.. i have turned to alcohol as its the only friend i have and i hate myself for that. There must be something undiscovered in our brains that we dont know of that causes us to feel this way because in all honesty most of the time i have no real reason to feel the way i do as i me sure some of you feel this too

      • Rob

        If someone got emotional unstability your actually using your higher intelligence in a bad way and that freaked me out too, once a bad self talk is to help yourself grow from the inside but everyday keeping yourself down aint good. I personally think you got to reconize where you hold yourself back and then search for a Mental Coach to keep up te positive feelings and self talk, you cant change in a day if you live this way a longer time! Coach yourself and be patient and you will be happie on your way

      • Ixora

        It’s society

      • Hate

        At least you have people that cares love you
        I don’t have that and never did
        I wish I was the same way others are with me
        I actually do care bout others but I have not one person asking me if I’m ok
        Never did

      • Hate

        At least you have people that cares love you
        I don’t have that and never did
        I wish I was the same way others are with me
        I actually do care bout others but I have not one person asking me if I’m ok
        Never did


          I believe that there is someone who cares even if you don’t know it someone does

      • portia

        Life seems unfair to me and I feel nothing, I tried fixing my self but it becomes worse. Failing 4 times at varsity makes me feel like I’m a failure. I’m 26 turning 27 with nothing to show, no boyfriend, no qualification and no kids. Nothing seems working for me.

        • Onetwotesting

          You are loved, and you are adored, just please, believe it. It doesn’t have to be life-changing when you just believe in your worth, it just has to be an act of kindness towards yourself. Because you deserve to be loved and you are. Allow yourself to love you. Allow others to love you. And Portia, or anybody who might be reading this, I really do believe those words. You don’t need to have a husband or wife or kids to be loved. I know society may seem to make it so it HAS to be a goal you reach, but you really don’t.

          And you’re still young. Give yourself time and love, and patience. If nothing seems to be working, however hard you try, do one thing for me. Don’t try so hard. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Just let things be. However they are, as every moment comes, be there. You’re beautiful. I wish I could say those words to you, face-to-face, so you would really know, but PLEASE believe me! You are loved, just as you are, right now, wherever you are standing, sitting, if you crying or laughing, smiling or talking. Wherever you are, whoever you are, wherever you go, whatever you choose to do, you are loved, always. Allow yourself to see that, whatever it is you’re feeling. Just lets things be, sometimes it’s all we need for things to work themselves out.

      • Jane

        I understand where you’re coming from . I feel the the Same.

    • Coal

      Sophie, asking questions is an interesting tool. Has to be the right questions, I’ve heard over and over again. I’m writing this to you and as a reminder for myself. Ask, what do I want to do that I will actually enjoy? If there is something, ask how can I really do this. If there isn’t something, ask, what was the last thing I enjoyed? Also, I am a firm believer in the body mind connection. It saved me. See a good endocrinologist and have a full panel of blood work done. No antidepressants, but getting vitamin mineral and hormone levels in the body right can save the day. Go to yoga classes. Everyone feels better unless you are suffering from a negative body image. Who cares though? You need to move your body in ways that are going to heal you. It works.
      Another thing that has helped me is what u call “the one foot in the grave theory”. Imagine you are a very very old person lying in your death bed. What advice would you give yourself right now? See life may feel long but it’s going to be over for all of us. Is there anyway you can enjoy it more? It’s a relatively quick ride.

    • Beautyinthebroken

      You know you are worth more than you think. I’m sick of being miserable in my life but for you and me lets challenge each other to make our lives the best. Everything seems to be going wrong in life but when we have to take positive out of it some way… Some how. If you want to feel satisfied in God fight for him. I have the shittiest life absolutely horrid whenever I turn away from him. But when I love him, not just saying it…. He always makes it better. If you want his holy ghost fight for it! God bless you princess, God blessed you that people that adore and the enemy is trying to waste time making you and me feel bad! Let’s challenge each other to live our short life on earth amazing. There is beauty in the broken, rainbows after rain, and eternal love from the lord.

    • cc

      It sounds like you have gone into a state of hypotension… And you are shutting of your feelings to protect yourself from them. Don’t be afraid to seek help.

    • Indian

      It’s pretty clear what the problem is. You have a good life, a husband and two two kids, in a reasonably good condition compared to 99.5% of the human race.
      Practice some gratitude.
      Do Negative Visualisation, Stoicism, charity events or talk to people who have it much worse off. Cancer patients, amputees, old men with regrets, people with distant familial relations, single moms etc
      if you have suffered with this 14 years, doing this should not take much effort.
      If you had this problem for a few months, it would be whining. But clearly you’ve been going through a rough patch
      Wish you the best.

    • China

      I feel the same way

    • Kenneth Cernias Cananua

      That is not true. Sorry for interrupting, but, I’ve also been in deep pains. And I hate concerning other that I don’t know personally. But, one thing I can say, If you’re still alive, You’re still in hope.

    • Pete

      Don’t commit suicide
      Try to enjoy life while you still have it, you gotta find something to do that you really like. live life to the fullest. Save up money and go on vocation with your family enjoy every moment with your family you never no when you will lose them.
      If none of the above help you might need to get counciling
      I hope I helped:)

    • Gaz

      Grow in your faith. It dies away if you don’t nurture it and seek God in every last thing you do.

    • Bratista

      I have a husband and two kids and feel the same way.

    • tamimi.90

      you gotta be so open minded to accept what im going to say but what if just what you are not on the right track what if you are not worshiping the right ‘God’ search for the truth look for debates online. Im 25 now and ive changed my religion 2 times. and my journey started by two simple questions 1.what if ive always been wrong ? 2.what if the what i think is completely wrong is actually the truth?
      if u made sure the answers are no by looking online searching watching debates or whatever then congratulations you found the truth.

    • Jillian

      Omgoodness….Idk what to say about your situation. I wish I could hug you and all your pain just fly away….I love you and I hope these words find you in a better place.

    • Chris

      Wow don’t say that if you left Earth Joy is not what they would feel trying to figure out what it is you need to be happy and obtain it or at least work towards it my $0.02

    • Melissa Gaydos

      I feel the exact same way😢
      Have you found a way of changing those thoughts?
      The more I fight the more I want something the more I loose interest.I’m to the point that I have to pretend Im exited about the things I was once interested in so that people won’t actually realize that I’m on the edge and just days or weeks from ending my world.

  • Jackie

    I don’t know. I feel like my self hatred is justified.I have let procrastination and laziness take over my life. My house is a mess, my car is a mess. I no longer have anyone to tell me what to do or to judge me, so i only do what passes me, like a child. I work full time but I feel like that’s all I do. I signed up for classes to finish my associates I got one bad grade and decided to give up/slack off. I’m ashamed of myself. I hate everyone and despise their happiness. I suppose that’d mean I’m selfish, spiteful and bitter. I don’t like using depression as an excuse. I don’t have motivation to make things better. I procrastinate my life away and stall things until ours to late to do them anymore. This is why i hate myself.

    • JB

      in contrast to you yet still the same I am all together. I have a great job, make a great living, have fabulous friends, an awesome son, yet I still see myself as a failure. How does that work?

    • AG

      That’s exactly how I am and how I feel. Reading this comment made me feel better, I guess misery does love company. I wish I could say something to make you feel better but I hope you know you’re not alone and we can change, to be the person we want to be.

    • dligac

      I hate myself in the same way. I’m the same as you. Except I have no job. And I don’t want any. I have no plans or desires. I just want to leave this stupid place. I hate everyone and I hate myself the most.

  • JB

    why is it that when I read what is written it makes sense, but I still single myself out as different. I am so tired of looking at myself in the mirror that it makes me sick . I am a 44 yr old single female that will never find a mate because I never feel someone could actually love me. So why do I continue? I know it is a catch 22- i hate myself, so therefore noone else can love me, and that makes me hate myself even more, and so on….

    • Who

      Girl, just look at yourself in the mirror, and listen to “Just the Way You Are” by Bruno Mars, then you’ll see what losers the guys that rejected you are.
      You’re amazing the way you are, don’t forget it. 🙂

  • Mask

    From time to time I type into Google “How to deal with hating yourself”. I read the articles, read the comments & then move on for I never truly find the answer.
    I truly despise myself. I feel I don’t deserve friends, caring family or any happiness in life at all. I constantly battle the darkness that I have inside and my family has seen how it pulls me into a state of sadness and depression. I always am able to come out of it and put on the mask of the loving husband and father. As I get older though, it becomes harder every day. The battle truly wears you down over the years and eventually it will be lost.
    The only thing that keeps me going is the sense of duty that I have to my family. No matter what I feel about myself, my sense of duty always prevails. When my children move on and I’m no longer needed, then I can stop fighting and let my darkness finally win.
    Do I believe in God? ABSOLUTELY! I’ve had enough God sightings in my life to make me a true believer. Do I believe I deserve to be saved? ABSOLUTELY NOT. It doesn’t matter what good I do in life and I will NOT have my darkness affect other souls.
    For all whom are fighting the same demons that I am, I truly feel sorry for you. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. Just remember that no matter how bad you feel inside, your family comes before anything else. Let them be the light that you fight for. It can get you through the day.
    I will add one final item. I have never posted, shared my thoughts or discussed my view points before. Maybe after 24 years of fighting in silence, something has finally broken through.
    I apologize if I have offended anyone with what I’ve said. It was not my intent.

    • barracuda43

      You have not me at least… but i have felt and am going through that feeling right now of feeling worthless, not good enough.. ect… I am a believer, and am saved and I have seen changes in me enough to believe god is changing me… for i despise the world not humans per say. But when I see how bad the world is getting, children abused, women raped, kidnapped, rise in violence, materialism. I wish I was never born. I would have rather been an angel with no will of my own and to serve god in all his glory and be his loving servant rather than a human full of sin and a free will…i would gladly trade my life and free will to have never been born and have been an angelic being serving god than to live on this earth… my life has been chaos since I was born, as a catholic raised i used to feel god hated me so much that he let me suffer physical, mental sexual abuse from my father, than my mother died when i was 3, my stepmother was an abusive person, burned my brother hands on a stove heater, for being hungry and getting into the peanut butter, that is the kind of child hood I came from…all my life I have had things happened to me. NOw I can say I have been blessed my second marriage with a loving husband and he adopted my two girls, my first husband was an alcoholic and extremely jealouse, physically abusive and emotionally. Atfter 10 years i finally divorced him and then a year later met my now husband. I have felt the love of god and christ’s redeeming love. I have seen changes in myself for the best but I still at times especially when I get so upset at injustice done on others i just cry and I cannot understand why humans can be so evil causing pain on others. I know there is a purpose … I do not question god i do not blame god I blame humans. I wish god had destroyed Eve when she disobeyed god in the garden of eden and had created another woman for adam an obedient god fearing woman… I would have destroyed all humanity during NOah’s day.. i would have not left one human alive… I am so sorry but sometimes I feel this way. I ask Jesus to fill me with the fruit of the holy spirit, to transform me from glory to glory.. I know I am saved because of the blood of Christ. At the cross and when I get angry i am so passionate about my feelings about wishing justice that I am so ashamed about my sin in anger… that I feel I am a stupid, silly, childish and scum because I do not know how to help others outside my home. I raised my daughters with morals, love as i knew it because i really did not know what it was to be loved. But I just knew I would treat my daughters with kindness and love and godly discipline. o They turned out decent good god fearing young ladies. But I still feel so worthless…. your not alone…

    • michelle

      I feel the same exact way. I just go through the motions of life and dealt with raising children, working multiple jobs etc. out of my sense of duty. I’m not basking in my misery in front of everyone. I try to keep myself busy all the while I know the darkness that lurks beneath me. I would never wish this on anyone. Like you I have only recently posted because I feel something is breaking inside of me.

  • Dylan

    I really need help :/. I’ve been like this since I was 12 or so maybe before. As long as I’ve had realized thoughts outside of being a child. I hate myself
    On a level that is overwhelming. I’m 20 goin on 21. So for the last decade I’ve felt alone. I know I’m ugly, I don’t see myself as attractive. I constantly stare at mirrors and always hate the reflection staring me back. This may sound dramatic, but I’ve never had a girlfriend. My whole life I’ve looked for a companion, someone to call mine, to feel loved but no one has wanted me. And I’ve tried, many many times, finding people I feel a connection with and hoping they do too. I’m a very good person, loving, kind, I have to malice or conciedeness in me. I just don’t wanna be alone anymore. A whole life alone is not a life worth living. And I know it’s because of my looks. I’m not cute and no matter what I am, the sweet person doesn’t matter if no one could get past the way I look. I mean I truly believe I would have had easily got someone to feel the same for me
    If I was attractive, and as such I’ve tried so Hard in vain. As I’m getting older now I feel like look worse and worse. I don’t know what to do, I’m
    Heavily considering plastic surgery, to feel
    Better because I know it’s not goin to go away. And I don’t wanna live like this :/ thanks for listening

    • LM

      Please know that you are loved and are cared for. TheHopeLine is always here for you. Please call or chat with one of the HopeCoaches at 800.394.4673 or to chat go to http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. Never, never give up on yourself.

    • Linda

      you know if you really look at JZ, he is really not that attractive. So attractiveness doesn’t necessarily get the girl. But taking an interest in your look and self-confidence does work.

  • mike

    I really needed to read this I felt so alone by my self an kept blamming my girl friend for it I felt un loved un wanted u felt ugly i felt like noone was here for all becouse of my dad an mom aren’t here I blame my srlf I call my self stupid I try killing my self becouse I feel unwanted I thank you guys alot for helping me every time I feel this way imma read this thabks

  • Trysten

    Everyday if I’m at school or if I’m at home I’m always getting beat up, bullied and hated on I feel so unloved and uncared for its been like this since kindergarden i hate myself and everything about me I wonder why am I special why am I alive I want to kill myself I have always been like this and I can’t figure out why I don’t know why I should be living if I ever find anyone that loves me ill die from a heart attack

    • TheHopeLine

      Trysten, Please know that you are loved and we care for you. TheHopeLine is always here for you. Please call or chat with one of our HopeCoaches at 800.394.4673 or to chat go to http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. Never, never give up on yourself.

      • Lynn

        I feel so empty inside I try every thing I can to keep the man I love. I dont want to see him happy with anybody because he never gave any attention so I just feel like I hate myself because I feel like its me I try my hardest to keep him but I can’t ………….

    • Michelee

      Please don’t say this. My heart hurts for you . You are loved and special. Are you being hurt in your own home? If so please tell someone. I know it’s confusing but you need to feel safe.

    • Arielle Le Blanc

      Hey Trysten.. I do already like you. Do not kill yourself please. World is much different than it seems to be. How old are you? Those who cannot appreciate your existence are idiots. Yes even if those are your parents. Most people have messed up values especially in our materialistic society. They are simply blind. No one is perfect. You are not perfect either. There are many things you will have to work on this life and change yourself. But that doesnt mean that you have no value and that you shouldnt be respected. Thats nonsense.

    • barracuda43

      If you only knew how precious you are to god, my brother went through the same thing, i was a bit stronger so I could handle my bullies, I would try to protect him as much as I could. We lost our mother when he was born, my father blamed my brother for her death and hated him therefore abused him, physically, sexually and mentally both of us, he married a woman who was equally abuse but not sexually abusive. We always felt no body could or would love us. I thought god hated us. But now I am grown and a born again christian, my poor brother long dead. I have seen changes in my self and have felt god’s love and now I understand how much he loves us. Remember John the Baptist? He lived a life of a vagabond, living in cave he , eating locusts wearing animal skins was considered a crazy lunatic, anti social out cast. But did you know that even Jesus said ” there has never been a prophet or shall never be one like John the Baptist” I bet you he felt like you and me. Just remember dear one that those who are god’s children, the world and satan will hate. He will make our lives on earth a living hell. Because this is not our home we are sojourners here on this earth, we don’t belong to this world there fore the world won’t recognize as one of it’s own. Be happy and glad that you are not part of this world. Jesus love those who were lowly, and humble, those who were considered outcasts. Jehovah used sinners and out casts for his glory and purpose and were even part of Christ’s family lineage.. like Hagar the madam harlot one of Jesus’s ancestors, Ruth the pagan moabites who converted later. David who committed adultery, and murder.. Moses who killed a guard in egypt, and had to run and hide the desert for 40 years, before Jehovah used him greatly. . the 12 apostles were bullied, imprisoned, run out of towns. Boiled in oil, cut in half, be headed, hung upside down on a cross. etc… dear friend you see being in Christ and belong to him will set the enemy on you and the world will hate us and despise us . it is not easy to say because sometimes I suffer times of self hate and self loathing, but I turn immediately to god’s word for a shaking up to his powerful words of encouragement and then I fast and pray that has been my deliverance from self destruction and self pity. I wish I knew you to help you and encourage you and to tell you that you are so important to god … you have a purpose even if it is to use that suffering you have experienced to help others..I am glad to have had this experience of pain in order to understand others with the same sufferings to be able to help what I have learned through the precious word of god through the holy spirit. We have to endure and pray every night and morning as you rise never stopping. Day by day take a day at a time. Sometimes I think I become so overwhelmed with my emotions of worthlessness and self hate. That I have to go to my room pick up word of god and a book titled ” God’s transforming power” it helps me when I am feeling bad about myself. So take it a day at a time. It is crucial that you stay on the word of Jesus. Keep your eyes on him and he will carry you through each day. I do this myself.. The enemy attacks more when he sees how much you are growing in christ and he knows your weakness, it is a battle but through Christ anything is possible in your faith and hope that we will be with him soon, and receiving the crown of glory if we just run the race preserving and even if you fail and fall get up and do not give up or that is where our reward shall be. It is the race for our souls.. This world shall pass but god’s love never passes God is always the same never changing never failing, always l so please do not lose hope. Your soul is sooooo preciouse to god..

    • deb

      I have a son who has suffered bullying for past six months and it breaks my heart people who bully are weak alone only tough together do not be afraid of anyone stand tall tell school my son has and the situation is getting dealt with and I won’t stop until it gets sorted everyone should be valued the same and everyone of us deserves to be loved 😉

    • Peggy

      Trysten I went thru bullying years ago…even by the teacher who wanted to be in with the cool kids. I cried every day, but we didn’t consider suicide much back then. Don’t let these people define you, God does love you more than you can imagine. You sound like you may be depressed and there’s no shame in talking to a therapist or going on medication if needed. God gave his children the intelligence to become doctors and therapists. If you do this make sure it’s someone you’re comfortable with…sometimes you have to go to a few to find that. God got me through…He will do the same for you. God bless and don’t give up…He made you special!

    • Kayla

      Oh my god. Don’t be sad. I’m also sad I’m I’m 11 years old. I’m almost 12. You are an awesome person and you should continue your life. Funny thing. I have s boyfriend whose name is Tristan( I don’t think he loves me. He kisses one of my friends on the cheek. He told my friend that he didn’t know why he was dating me and I wasn’t pritty and I had pimples). You shouldn’t kill your self( p.s I feel the same way and I’m a girl). Please I hate it when people die.😪😪😢😢. Please don’t die.

  • judy

    I hated myself ever sense i was nine but i kept on going dealing with the pain and sadness but when i saw the famous Ann Miller . she told me that it doesn’t madder if you did something wrong it just matters if you have love with family friends then the past wont bother you and just one thing if you believe in me god and happiness the you will be OK . Ever since the i listen to her and now you just have to get through life and one suggest en don’t ever give up keep trying and believe

  • shelley

    I really hate my life.I have always been in controlling relationships and it seems it doesn’t get any better.I’m always walking on egg shells to please him,he is always accusing me and the list goes on.I’ve done nothing but cry and wonder what I’ve done to have a life like this…

  • Ethan

    I feel like nobody likes me the way I am!

  • Alex

    I hate myself. I just was pampered, and now I feel depressed. I am not worthy to be here.

  • i just dont like me. every time im out with my family i screw something up.i just hate me… i know that im soo weird that no one ever talks to me other then 5 friends at school.i just dont like me

  • hannah

    I’ve began to notice I’ve been developing signs of depression, which makes me hate myself even more. I feel like my family is unhappy with me in their family, I’m always crying because my feelings have been hurt or I’m just mad at myself for something. it’s been an awful feeling and my parents seem to have no consideration for how I’ve actually been feeling. They just stand there and call ME rude, inconsiderate, selfish, ungrateful, a piece of work right in front of my face. They seem to not understand that these things kill me inside, hating myself because I’m not a good enough child. I’m only 15. The only time I can make them proud is when I play sports. That’s all. I don’t make phenomenal grades, I annoy them, I’m “needy”, I’m always in their way. It seems to secretly be all about them. They always give the same old we love you speech. I think it’s bullshit they’re saying because they’re my parents. I know they do love me, maybe. But it doesn’t seem like it. You don’t show love by letting me shop, or give me things I want. Seems that’s what they think it is. I feel empty. I always feel my friends hate me. I’m always fighting with my sister. Its all bullshit and I’m starting to develop these feelings, evaluating my parents words of what they think of me and it makes me HATE MYSELF.

  • Karl Greenberg

    I’m just an idiot

  • Kylie

    I have hated my self for a long time my mom abusive boyfriend has raised me ever since I was little to be a fighting machine I almost killed my friend when I was 7 he moved away I was lonely for a while after that I couldn’t make friends we’ll I live an abusive home and found out my real father left my mother cause of me … I am bullied at school and no one seems to care about me … I wish I wasn’t here and I hate me and my life I have attempted suicide 2 times but failed because someone had stopped me I have been to a mental asylum for cutting my self depression suicidal thoughts and a lot more , and I’m tired of it this new medication they have put me on hurts me but they won’t take me off ! I still want to die ! I don’t belong here ! Please someone help

  • Anonymous

    I can really relate to this article…
    I absolutely hate myself. I’m 16 years old and the past couple of years I’ve started to hate myself more and more every single day. I’ve thought about commiting suicide more than once, but even for that I’m too much of a coward.
    When I was a kid I didn’t used to hate myself, but everyone else did. I got completely ignored in school by my classmates and out of school I barely had any friends.
    Now people do like me and hang out with me in school, but deep inside I still hate every single piece of me.
    I have had a few boyfriends, but I kept breaking up with them because I was too scared that someday I would somehow hurt them and I just didn’t want to ruin their lives.
    I keep hiding my self-loathe from the rest of the world. On the outside I look like a happy little girl who loves to make music and is very polite and kind to other people.
    But when I get home, that’s when the drama starts and I start hating myself more and more. For some reason I keep taking all of the anger I have towards myself out on her and I hate myself for it! I’m honestly a little brat, who doesn’t know how to respect her own mother and believe me in her eyes I’m the worst daughter in the whole wide world. She even tells me I look like my father, who used to abuse me and once she’s said those things she just acts like she never tried to hurt me.
    I absolutely hate myself and I wanna be a better person, but I don’t know how. Even typing it out here makes me feel worse about myself.
    But I have to get it out of my system and since I have absolutely no one to talk to about this, without them thinking I wanna get loads of attention, I thought that this might help… But I’m not so sure.
    I wish someone could help me, but I know that there’s nobody out there who’d even think about helping me.

    A horrible person

    • mediocrebrownhair101

      Dear Anonymous,
      I want you to know that you are not alone. As I was reading these comments, I saw yours and felt somewhat relating to your situation. Please know that your life will not always be this way! One of my favorite quotes is “Think of all the beauty around you and be happy.” -Anne Frank. I’m sure you can count some of the things in your life that make you smile or feel alright—not perfect…but alright. Just try to focus on not all the misery around you, but of the good things still there. That’s the start of being a better person. Grow closer to your friends, and maybe try sharing how you feel. You’ve already taken a step by sharing here–on a public website. I think that it is fortunate when someone has friends. I don’t have any, which is embarrassing to say as a sixteen-year-old girl.But I’m trying really, so hard not to define myself with silly things like that. And you should too. I really believe in your ability to help yourself! 🙂 I don’t know if you are a Christian, but I’m praying for you.. 🙂

      Someone who thinks you are strong enough!!

  • Kaye

    I hate myself because of my appearance. Many nights I cry myself to sleep trying to find relief. A few times I have taken an overdose of sleeping pills but it doesnt work. Why am I here? I want to kill myself. School is hard, I am depressed and I am nearly failing. I just want to go in a deep hole and hide. I have no help just no one to help. Only the victim knows. When someone tries to cheer you up and explain things to u like u are gods creation, or u are unique, or the most popular one~words cant hurt. Well it does because we have hearts and brains. We have feelings. Most times it is depressing especially when u are nice but the only thing people always see is ur flaws. Just remember this we only have one life. You are not alone. I am not alone and so arent you.

  • ugly girl

    what i would do was go on google and see things i could do to make me prety or something but then i just realized that it was never going to happen me ever being beautiful because nobody can cure ugly…unless you get surgery but who would want that it just be better if you werent born and thats what i kept telling myself. i hate myself because everytime i look in the mirror i dont like what i see and i see a UGLY GIRL and that girl is me. i can’t help to point out all my flaws out and it hurts me that i got so many. i compare myself to every other girl i see at school and i always end up being ugly and feeling it. ive never really liked myself since i was in the fourth grade i would always be that ugly girl and i still do feel that way. sometimes i wonder if anyone ever gets tired or their eyes start to hurt just by looking at me.

  • Sofie

    I hate myself because Im not even special… I feel worthless. I don’t even know why God put me here. Compared to the other girls at school, I’m garbage. And I know comparing yourself is a bad thing to do, but I can’t stop. Their all so pretty and atheltic, but I have pimples and messy curly hair, and I can’t run without getting winded. I suck at every sport Ive ever played. The teachers hate me, because I’m a liar. I dug my own hole. And I can’t get out. No one will help me in real life. My mom, teachers, friends, they just don’t get it..
    It just feels like itd be easier to die than live with this self loathing.

    • AnneRose180

      God put you here because He knows you are strong enough to live life and overcome. He also knows exactly your struggles and just how hard it is for you sometimes, or maybe all of the time. But He loves you, so much. No matter what you do, what you see yourself as, God will never stop loving you. And He wants you to remember that you are worth it all in His eyes.
      Physical imperfections don’t define you. Perfection doesn’t define those other girls. Beating yourself down about this only makes it harder to overcome. I’ve learned it time and time again. All you can do is just pray. Pray to overcome. I know it’s silly. But the only one who can handle this perfectly is God. I know how this feels. I try to change myself, starve myself, abuse myself with words, but what is the real answer? Nothing. My ways never worked, because I thought I had to change myself to solve it. The real answer is to accept that you are you….and you are good enough.
      Pretty tough to do. I’m still trying too, so you’re not alone in this. Just pray–even if you feel it wasn’t heard. He’ll be there.
      I don’t know if you’re a Christian, but just try to take that first step if you are tired of trying to survive on your own. I’m praying for you.

  • Matthew

    Well, I don’t feel happy in my life. I have an incredibly low self esteem, I always care for other people. My Mom and Dad both left me when I was 3 years old, only to be brought in by my parents Denise and Jim; who had 3 other kids, my sister Mallorie and I have been housed by them for the last 10 years and it’s been an emotional struggle for me. Here’s my story, I used to be bullied like no tomorrow, I was picked on for my issues and people badgered me constantly about it. My Mom and Dad have an intense favoritism of my older brother, my Grandma favors my cousin Austin because I’m an atheist and he’s a “goody two shoes Christian who gets his ass up to Church every Sunday”, but I lost all faith by the time I was 9 years old, I realized deep down in this world there probably is no God and I’ve sort of accepted that fact. The next two years went by, I still had issues, I was still picked on. In the 6th grade, oh boy that was my worst. My issues soared more than ever, I had girls who didn’t reciprocate the same feelings, I had people pick on me for my anger issues, and by May, I was expelled after going to an alternative school. I transferred to another school, only to be picked on again, being called “herpes face” because of my bad acne, I didn’t care anymore, the year went by, and yeah. The 8th grade, was my breaking point; I pushed my Mom into a staircase, and I still constantly live to that emotional torment, my girlfriend left me around 9 days after that because she was scared; I was at my edge, I was attempting suicide, I began smoking cigarettes, and pot. My Grandma didn’t want me at her Christmas day event with everyone if I was getting suspended from school and I felt rejected until my Mom said something that I should go and no one deserves to be “alone during Christmas; especially your own family”. I then had another girlfriend who left me sighting “differences” when really she became a lesbian.. These months went by, during the summer I thought of suicide, but I could never do it. My friends Gavin and David would talk me out of it a lot. In August, school came back, I was so unhappy, I had girls call me attractive who hated my guts three years ago. But then I met a girl who is the light of my life, Elysha. I lover her a lot and I asked her out eventually, she said yes. We’ve been dating for a bit and she’s an amazing girlfriend who I love more than anything and anyone; she’s accepted my mistakes and this time reciprocates the same feelings. I also began running more and trying to ride my bike, I feel somewhat happier in my life but I can’t quite get rid of the torment from my past.

  • ELM

    I thought I had the love of my life and had to kick him to the curb for his cheating. I feel like I’ve lost 15years of my life. 13 with him and the 2 years I’ve been grieving. I still work with him and have to see him occasionally. So disappointed in all that life has handed me so far. I am born again and feel like a loser because I keep giving this over to God because His “yoke is strong” then wind up in depression again every day. What’s wrong with me? I hate myself and want out but have people who depend on me. I don’t believe in love or happiness anymore even though I know God promises it.

  • Me

    For a long while now I’ve been feeling down I think about 2yrs Ican’t I can do anything right,I tried turning to God but I ruined that too. I would have committed suicide a long while ago if I didn’t know its a sin. I put up a happy and cheerful expression when I’m around people my mum recently noticed it. I know God loves me but its hard to believe sometimes. I am so tired of life ,if I weren’t so scared of hell id have committed suicide a long time ago. My life sucks and I.need help but I don’t really trust anyone and if Ithink God is sick of hearing me complain

  • Todd

    May as well share my story since I read ya’ll’s, All my life I’ve always felt alone like I have a older brother but he never cared for me and both my parents prefer him over me. I didn’t have many friends I just had two and with being alone I took on smoking weed regularly cause it was the only thing to make me forget who I am and I can actual smile and enjoy things. Then few years later I met the girl of my dreams and she was my 1st real love. We dated for 3 yrs 2 months and she broke up with me and during that time she was the only person there for me. If it wasn’t for her I would have spent a few Christmas’ alone and every year of my birthday. So I was actually happy, like a real happy then after we broke up I just went back to who I was before just a lonely outcast. Just few days after we broke up I guess I could call it my dark time. I didn’t eat for a week I lost my job and when I went to do some work for extra money and I couldn’t do anything cause i didn’t have the strength. I just kept getting dizzy and shaking it was hard to stand. Then when I tried to find someone to talk to me or just anything and I couldn’t. find anyone I had gave up all my friends so I could spend more time with my ex gf. Then that’s when I started taking pills to make me feel numb and one day I just wanted to escape so I took all the pills I had left and washed it down with liquor and then I don’t remember much. I just remember waking up on the floor with black vomit next to me and my left arm had been cut up with a knife and my arm was soaked in blood. I had real bad pains in my kidneys and stomach areas. My mom did see my cut up arm and she didn’t even talk to me about it. She just talked about herself which kinda made it worse. I’m still here and I still talk to my ex on daily basis when I wake up till we fall asleep but that’s all.All I really have to look forward to now is talking to her and I’m sure she’s the only reason I’m still here cause I don’t want to break her heart if I did something to myself again. She’s all I ever had. My family doesn’t care about me I haven’t seen any of them in years. And sadly I never had a family member to tell me happy birthday well my dad can’t even remember me on birthday and that hurts so bad. Btw, I wait every year for a phone call to tell me happy b day but it never comes. Am I that bad of person that no one wants anything to do with me? I’m tired of crying myself to sleep, tired of always being alone and not having any one. All I got left now is my music, video games, and my weed that’s my life right now…sounds fun right ?
    Sorry I went to far I just had a lot if stuff I wanted to say.

    • Marie

      hey, i can relate to you massivley. although i havent quit smoking weed, you should maybe cut down. although you feel good when you are smoking it it makes you feel more down when you are sober, at least thats the case with me. i only smoke some to help me with sleep now. love does terrible things to you when it goes wrong. i like to talk to people over the internet, maybe make friends over forums about the things you are interested in, you dont have to be alone. i had a lot of heartbreak with my ex, i got strung along a lot, and i thought enough is enough i deserve better than that. i have also thought about hurting myself and took pills but it never helps, i just feel guilty afterwards. i have been in this situation for a ages, almost 5 years now, and i find the best thing is to look for your passions, be creative, read lots about anything that excites you, go for walks in the middle of the night look at the stars, anything to break the cycle. its just a suggestion, when i do this i feel different. the stars make me wonder, which helps my mind drift from all the negative things. i am feeling very alone right now, but i like to think its a chance to get to know myself, spend a lot of time doing the things i want to do, teaching myself things i want to learn. people say life is too short but it is the longest thing you will ever do and all you have is time, give yourself a break and thankyou for opening up, there are many of us that are too frightened or ashamed to talk about their problems, remember you are brave and there is hope, i really do hope you feel better soon. another thing is change, i move my room around a lot so i dont feel like im stuck in the same room, it might work for you, but we are all very different. it pains me to know a LOT of people out there feel the same as i do, i would not wish it upon anybody, i really do hope this helps. take care and stay positive if you can, x

  • michelle

    I quit my job because of how stressed I was. So much so that I was taking everything out on my kids. What sucks is that now, my husband tells me that this is why I’m a bad mom and why he is considering divorce. I try so hard to make everyone else happy before myself, and when I do something for myself my world comes crashing down. It’s hard not to hate yourself when this happens. I do feel like my very existence is a burden to everyone around me. Maybe my girls would be better off if I weren’t in the picture anymore…

    • sharmila

      hi michelle hang in there..you are a well deserving person ..god loves you a lot….and your girls love you more…pick yourself up n live..you have immense strength in you..please dun ever give that up

  • Sickoftrying

    I am a waste of space and i hate myself. Im ugly, fat and weird. Im worthless and no body likes me. I have no friends and no hope for the future. Its been years since i picked up a blade but temptation runs so deep

  • Rashed ALrashed

    I hate my self but i accept my self i don’t see that i am worth thinking about but i am fine i don’t need to like my self as long as i accept who i am. I am just empty that’s why i do everything

  • Sasha

    I am a 21 year old woman; and have given up with both myself and life. I remember being happy at primary school, but when i started secondary school that changed. I knew no one, the only friends i could make were very sweet but very ‘different’. People i knew i wouldn’t be life long friends with them. In classes where i didn’t have friends i just day dreamed, dreamed of being an adult, having no school and of being happy. These dreams were enough to keep me going. When i left school i went to collage part-time and for the first time since i was a child became truly happy.
    I made friends with a close group of 4 girls and a boy; we got drunk together almost everyday, they did drugs too, which i did try when i got to 17. Well i loved drugs from that first time, life was a party i was defo making up for those horrible school days. Then when i hit 19 i knew it was time to grow up. I got a full-time job, started to quit drugs and the only alcohol i aloud myself was a friday night down the pub. I remained best friends with the 5 people i’d met at collage, but then one of them ‘Laura was murdered. Her bf was a brute but non of us saw it coming. All of us went into meltdown then; drinking non-stop, drugs the lot. I ended up in hospital and can never drink again or that’s it for me. So i went sober again, and 1 by 1 all the group put the drugs and alcohol behind us. Life has never been the same since; slowly but surely ive been sinking deeper into myself. Our group is no more, non of us talk much although we still count each other as best friends.

    Over the last two years i’ve been too 16 funerals, almost all young, and mostly to do with drugs. 3 months ago the boy of our group James who was my best friend, my soul mate and my family took his own life. I wasn’t in a good place before, dead end job i hate, weekends sat in watching tv; fun no longer a part of my life. I used to be the biggest party animal about. Since James has gone, i just feel empty, angry and out of control. I always used to put a smile on my face, even when i was crying inside people would make comments about how i was always so happy. From 16-19 i was happier then i think most people will ever feel, i think that’s why now i just can’t find that fake smile anywhere, I know what happiness is now. I know i’ve had my share, i can’t dream about the future, dream of being happy with friends. I’d done it for real and it’s in the past now. The future is just going to be the same dead end job, same boring nights in, no one i can talk to. I can’t even have children which had always been my final dream. There is no point, i dream of going to the pub and going crazy, downing vodka like the old days; passing out for the night and never waking up. I can’t do that to my mum though.

  • the nobody

    I do hate my self because of what others think. And that my life has a lot mistakes, my parents just don’t understand, I feel like the dumbest person in class, and I’m just, well, jugded by everybody.

    • Johnny Bravo5713

      God said in the Bible

      Judge not, that ye be not judged.Matthew 7:1

      So if people are judging you.God will judge them and you dont be worried about that.Just make yourself cool with God.
      I made a lot of mistakes and was going to give up on life but later i got through.So can you.Just be strong girl!
      Take care and live your life :0

  • hasty

    I’m 44 alone woman, so lonely most of my friends got married
    and left me alone despite all the good things and kindness that I have done to
    them and was there for them always, all the time, all the time, everyone says
    that I’m so kind but they leave me so easily, as easy as if I don’t call them
    they won’t .never, ever with no reason.

    I’m alone and in Canada
    with that freaking cold, sad weather. All my family, mom and brothers are in another
    country that I see them once in a year. And no going back to them is not an
    option right now.

    I wake up several times during the night and thinking why,
    why this happened to me. I know I shouldn’t say such a thing like why me but I can’t
    help to stop those though that bombarding me, killing me and drowning me in sadness, starts from morning as soon as I’m out of the
    bed to the night. I have ajob that I
    hate but I even don’t have strong motivation and strength to change it.And now
    food becomes my everything: my family,
    my husband, my kids, my friends, my pet
    my love …. And yes I’m a lonely, fat 44 year old female that surrounded with
    lucky, happy people and she is invisible to them.

    I believe in god, I used to be a strong believer but I don’t
    believe that he likes me. I’m deprived from the simplest human needs that is
    love and to be loved and that’s not fair. I did everything, it is not fair

    I can’t, I can’t write one more word …sobbing

  • mm

    I often feel very hopeless, because I keep falling into the same habits over and over again. I really do want to change and do what I want to do, but I think I am holding myself back because I hate myself so much and tell myself that I’m not good enough which makes me hate myself even more. I really do want to change but can’t bring myself to change and it’s killing me to be stuck in this ongoing cycle. I can be positive and ok sometimes, but when I start falling into a rut again the hatred comes back and I don’t know how to stop this. I really want to stop doing this and change, I REALLY do, but I’ve continuously tried and failed. I don’t want to be here because I don’t feel like I can change because I’ve can’t stick with it. I don’t want to keep living and interfering with peoples lives, but I know it will interfere with people that for some reason care about me if I take my life. I don’t know why I was put in this Earth to be a screw up and hurt other people. I welcome death and yet I don’t quite feel I can go down that road. I just hate being stuck in limbo like this. Please if there is any advice for me to be a better person and stop hating myself so much so that I stop hurting others, it’d be greatly appreciated.

  • A

    How do I tell someone that I hate myself? I feel like I can’t tell anyone because they’ll assume that I’m trying to get attention or just overreacting. I feel like I am incapable of talking to anyone about how I feel because I am so scared that they will judge me or try to “fix” it by telling me, “Oh, everyone loves you!” I’ve tried talking to my mom about it, but she doesn’t help me either. I feel like I am keeping this from everyone and like I am lying to them an that makes me feel even worse. I just want to stop feeling this way and believe me, I’ve tried, but nothing works permanently because in a few days or one to two weeks the feelings of hopelessness and self-hate are back stronger and I just don’t know what to do anymore.

  • abby

    In all of these quotes, it is saying ,”I used to hate myself.” Key word ‘used’. What if we still do?

  • Mapp

    I hate myself. I remember a lot of stuff from my past, a lot of bad stuff that happened to me, caused by others, caused by me. I don’t usually remember happy things, mainly the bad ones. I am hard/strict towards myself when I’m commited to do something, I seek the perfection in many things. Yet, when people notice my skills and I’m requested to do some things I immediatelly think that I’m no good, that my skills in ANYTHING are awful. After doing the task I was given actually pretty well for a first time trial I take the refinement advices, given by long-term professional, as a list of failures I’ve done. Now that this has been going on for years I’ve noticed that this “fear” of not doing things right effects my skills of learning. When someone tells me to do something I’m so consentrated on listening that I’m not “actually listening what he/she” is saying. Because of this, in many cases things have to be told to me step-by-step as if I’m simple-minded. This is bizarre since in many cases I get a very thorough – very professionally thorough – analysis of the whole job process after first try. In these cases I could tell the people I work with some better working methods, but I don’t trust my on logic, not even when I’m actually right. I really hate myself.

  • This guy

    I fail at every friendship or relationship I try to start. I cant finish anything I start. I Have now been to school for makeup, which was a dead end, I gave up after a year because i thought it was too hard. nowim 22 living with my parents andm y boyfriend, back in school for heath care, and feel useless. I hate myself. My life. My family. My loved ones. Myself. I feel like if i give up now, im doing the world a favour. I really just dont see how anyone could apprechiate me.

  • Emily

    I am 17 and can not stand anyone looking at me, I hate what i look like, what clothes i wear and the feel of them and i always feel disgusting in my self. I always have an urge to go in the bath even if i’m out shopping because my hair or skin is irritating me and i try to scrape/scratch my skin away or keep pulling at my hair. I always flip out at everyone who irritates me and i cant even sit in my own room or concentrate on anything. I also suffer with bad stomach cramps, diarrhea, headaches and muscle pain (Hip and Back pain). I dont always feel like this but id say 90% of the time i do. I also feel like i’m going to die and get short of breath and always go light headed… Can anyone help me please? I’m sick of my Mum not taking me seriously and i think the doctors would just not care.

    • TheHopeLine

      Emily, We are here and we are listening. You are not alone in what you are experiencing. We are sending you an email to help you further with what is going on. Please check your email. Also, another resource is signing up for and email mentor that you can email with back and forth for as long s you like. You can sign up at this link, click on the email mentor tab: http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ Please never give up. Chat with us anytime 24/7 to talk about what you are going through.

  • molly

    Glad to see I’m not alone

  • merce

    Hi, i hate myself i really do i cant ever seem to make any friends i try so hard wishing i could be skinnier or prettier and it never haooens, i starve myself to just be thinner, to feel thinner, i have a horrible personality and people hate me for it, im never the person they go to to hangout or talk to no matter how hard i try to be there for them I’m stilleft.behind thinking what i couldve done diffrently to maybe be liked by someone, by anyone. People think the whole sad look i always have is for attention but its really just me, im sad, and i cant do anything to fix it. I have no one to turn to no one who understands. I just want to feel wated i want to not be sad anymore, but thats impossible because im someone no one could love

  • Sean

    I’m working on fixing myself, I was resorting to alcohol for the longest time as a way of numbing the pain. One day I realized it was the wrong thing to do to deal with it and that I was hurting the ones I loved. It’s been a slow and painful processes but I think I’ve finally come to a point where I can appreciate myself.

  • ischa23

    Feb 8,2014 I just lost my mother used call me so much name she was emotional physical mental person I was call dumb stupid ugly all the names in book I felt like my mother never love I never got hug from my from my mom I grew up without father so I felt my mom never love me I feel she hated me me now I’m married of 3yrs I feel my husband hates me i don’t knw if he loves me i don’t knw it wasn’t shown to me i feel ugly i hate myself i don’t love my self

  • junkie

    i hate myself cause im a fucking junkie piece of crap. i’ve stayed up all night shooting stimulant drugs and i’m so addicted and feel so alone and hopeless in this addiction of mine. 🙁 right now im crying and typing this message and being strung out. i’ve hurt so many of my close people and done a lot of bad things and i cant stand myself. i’m so sick of myself and my weak personality. i hate myself.

    • Taylor

      Read pema chodron’s “Start Where You Are” or ‘when things fall apart’. Gabor Mate writes some great stuff about addiction. You might find it useful. Sending you love and strength my friend.

  • anon

    I have been saved. I understand God’s love. I try to be better. I have a great husband and 4 wonderful kids. My life isn’t perfect but it’s really really good. And I just want to disappear forever. I realize that it’s wrong and I’m not trying to kill myself again but there’s just so much empty inside of me that I can see the attraction. I realize that’s stupid and I’m not trying to act on i t, or anything like that, but it’s not because of my appearance or relationships or any of those things you mentioned. I just feel like everyone would be better if I wasn’t in the picture. Intellectually, I realize that’s a load of poop, but I feel like it would fix everything. I know in my heart that I will ruin everyone’s lives around me with my existence. I know in my brain that I’m an idiot for feeling that way. I hate myself. How do I fix it?

  • Victoria Lyn

    I feel like I cause pain on purpose. I get an attitude over little things and it’s ruining my relationship. It’s like I don’t know how to apologize or admit I’m wrong. I just expect it to go away and everything to be normal again, but my boyfriend won’t let it be like that. I’m always causing something to happen, I feel like I’m so used to it I think it’s normal. My last relationship really messed me up in the head, & I feel like I’m taking that with me in this relationship also. I’m literally driving myself crazy/insane.

  • lost

    I do hate myself. I am a senior in college and I majoring in international studies (which is a joke). I have one class a day and i work whenever im not in class. I started off as an undecided major but took a really cool neuroscience class. I almost could of pulled off a neuro major even though i started late but i thought i wasn’t smart enough. i was valedictorian of my high school but my gpa is only a 3.77. I feel inadequate and like i have failed. I can’t make it through this semester because everything feels meaningless. I hate myself. all i do is work and i can’t even afford a laptop for school. i hate college and i hate wasting such a valuable opportunity because i am too stupid. I could of been happy and doing something smart but instead im having the biggest joke of a semester ever. I don’t understand how anyone could feel satisfied with 4 easy classes and not learning anything. i hate it and it’s too late for me.

  • Justin Bassler

    I.. I’m hated by everyone I’m depressed heavily but I’m slowly struttin through it.

  • M4thiasGod

    Hey I’m a kid in high school and I read this conversation and all of this is pretty much my life.mits not that I don’t think I look good. I have a problem with high metabolism and that makes me feel like a freak cause of how skinny I am. All the time people act nuts and crazy and send each other funny pics that teachers say are inoproppriate, and everyone laughes and praises them and whenever I do something Relatively close to that, people just look over at me with questioned looks and whenever I speak out and say what the heck they just say stuff like,” we don’t send stuff like that”, or,” he is better at it stop copying. I Have literally been told to stop trying. I have literally given up on life. I got nothin left to say.

  • kyleG

    Im empty. …cant find love. I come from a good family. …it doesn’t matter.
    Everyday is exactly the same. .i have no hope..goals..love…
    I’ve done this to myself. ..deep self hate I’ve built…fed…
    I’d do anything to feel…something..

    Can someone tell me something to open my heart….please..

  • Kieran

    I hate myself. I’m so ugly, I feel like nobody honestly cares or will care about me, and to be honest, I’m a big old failure. I’m only in 7th grade, so no one really “understand” why I’m feeling this way. I looked up why do I hate myself, so here I am. I think part of the reason I hate myself is because nobody I know feel like it, so I feel like and outcast at school. I my as well just go goth and call it a day. I hate the people at school who think their the best, jocks basically, and richer people. They go along in their lives, Happy as can be, not a single worry in life. They’ll never have to experience a real problem in their lives. I’ve probably just wasted everyone’s time, so, sorry.

  • Kieran

    Sorry for coming back so quickly, i”m sure you’re all “happy” to hear from my hideous self again, but I have a question to ask. Is It normal to feel the way I do? I mean nobody else I know feels likes this. I’m made of fun of at school, I swear my family hates me, and I’m so odd. people at school don’t get me or want to get me. I just wanted to know if it was in any way normal to feel like i don’t fit, like a piece of puzzle that doesn’t fit anywhere. That extra piece that even when you”re finished, it doesn’t go anywhere.

  • js

    I Be Hating Myself Sometimes Cause It Seems Like I’m Failing I Can Never Do Anything Right Something Always Going Wrong . Anyway I Have A Son & Its Always Something To Have My Emotions Going Crazy Then I Break Down & Start Balling Right There In Front Of Him . My Boyfriend Doesn’t Make Nothing Better He Just Adds To The Stress

  • TheHopeLine

    It takes courage to reach out for help and we want you to know that you are not alone. You can chat with a HopeCoach 24/7 or sign up for an email mentor. The conversation is free, confidential and non-judgemental. You can keep talking to your mentor as long as you like and there is never a fee. Talking about your struggles, decisions and fears is better than not talking about them. Click on this link to chat or sign up for an email mentor. http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Johnny Bravo5713

    Hi sfm.I was born in 1988.I agree with you on the thought that life started degrading after 90’s.It’s my personal view and i believe in Bible and it says in Matthew 24:12 that “Because of increase of wickedness”.So basically the peace is lost as days progress.You hear and see acts of violence,hate,obscene acts etc.But we cant change all that.Once Mahatma Gandhi told “The change we wish to see in the world should be in ourselves”.So we cant change the world we only need to change the way we see it by asking God for help.
    I passed this phase once about which you say like my life was back then and nostalgia stuff.I was really stuck and depressed and i sought help.One person told me “Nostalgia is a dangerous place.If you keep thinking too much about it you’ll never appreciate the present.ever.So even though the present may be not as beautiful as past but still thank God for the beautiful past and dont think much about it and thank for the present and live the moment’ Then i changed my views and it helped me friend.
    “Look back in satisfaction,Look forward in confidence and thank God for the breath we take which he breathed into us”.Wish you a Good life my firend 🙂

  • Johnny Bravo5713

    Hi Danny,After reading your comment i see myself few years ago.I exactly had the same mind set.I wanted to end my life but i was not that courageous and most importantly because it was a sin.So my daily prayer was “Lord please kill me because i cant do it and thank you”.I used to do this and never got anything.Then i started to do some research on this.I found this article on the net and it changed the way i think.I bookmarked it and now feel like sharing it with you.Please read it once.


    I’m a believer and so giving my thoughts in that context.The greatest people of the Bible “Moses,Job,Elijah,Jonah” prayed the exact prayer i did.I was really surprised.So we’re not alone brother.They all asked God to kill them because they didnt want to commit suicide.

    But God never answered single one of them because God didn’t like that prayer.Then i realized even God wont kill me when i want.He’ll take me when he wants to.So i stopped thinking when God will take me.

    When i get difficulties i compare myself with Job.A rich man with beautiful family.Lost everything in one day.All dead,got boils,became like a beggar but still thanked God? Well i get encouraged by that.Even though i have difficulties i’m gonna face them.And about your difficulties you’ll have to bear them because we live in a cursed world my friend,but remember God will help you overcome.

    1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

    So brother give up that thought of dying because God wants you to live until he wants you to come home.God bless you and have a good life my dear 🙂

  • Matthew

    I’m 38 and I’ve been divorced for about two years now. I’ve neglected responsibilities and by doing so, I feel I’ve painted myself in a corner. It’s really hard to feel good about myself these days, and to feel like I’m a part of the world.

  • ido

    have u ever tried avoiding words like “myself”, “I”, “me”? Let’s try it together 😀 we should go dancing, invite someone to dance, and tell a bad joke. Then just laugh =)) cook cookies! concentrating on actions, and taking them (everything is good, when wondering what to do, jump! that should be good enough! and repeat =)) ), could that be something different? if not a solution, at least “this is another way to start the day”

  • maggie

    I am constantly feeling worthless ,I have a husband and son but I feel like im the worst mother and wife .I have no job and suffer from depression and panic attacks and at times I feel like I don’t fit in and recently feel I don’t want to be in this world anymore. My dad has always told me how worthless I am and how I will never do anything worthwhile that im a waste of space and the fact that I didnt do well at school and have no job makes me think he’s right.He has always said the same to my brothers too and always praised everyones children but never his own. It is probably why I don’t like to fail at anything and feel low when I do. I don’t have any friends to talk to and feel more helpless and alone than ever before ..

    • TheHopeLine

      Maggie, We want you to know that you are worthy and you matter! I know it’s hard and having a father that didn’t show you unconditional love growing up can make being an adult even harder. Talking about it and seeking a doctor’s help for your depression is so important. Please, please never give up and keep trying. Please chat with a HopeCoach that cares anytime 24/7 at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. If you want download our free app to your phone to chat download it here. http://thehope.dm/thlmobileapp You would really love having an email mentor that you could continue talking about this long term. You can sign up for one with our app or at our Get Help page.

  • TheHopeLine

    Kristin, We want you to know you are loved and that you are beautiful, smart and worthy! We are here for you 24/7 please call a HopeCoach at 800.394.4673 or chat with a HopeCoach at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. If you want download our free app to your phone to chat, call, email and get encouraged here is the link to download it. http://thehope.dm/thlmobileapp

  • fille

    i really hate myself . i feel i’m a good for nothin . i’m not able to shine in things I do , coz i feel i’m not very smart . I always wanted to b popular . I m fed up of being mediocre . what I really want is respect frm ppl around me

  • Raven Wind

    I just feel like I have so many expectations that I get frustrated and say things that I never mean. And then I begin to hate myself and then think about hurting myself. I guess i just keep feeling that my rage is distributed to anything and everything. Sometimes I feel, “Well how can God love me?” after all that I’ve said and done. But I love Him nonetheless, so I hope that He can forgive the things I’ve said about others, myself, and doubting Him and His genius and what He thinks is best for me. Lately, I’ve been really stressed out about the Bible, which I know you should never be, but I keep thinking that I can’t live up to the expectations. People say women can’t wear pants, I love wearing pants, so using that as an example, I feel torn between what i right and what is wrong. If anyone could give some advice on that, I’d love it, because I wouldn’t want to take anything out on God.

  • Depressed

    I need to get something off my chest. Even if its towards total strangers. I cant bring myself to tell the people that i actually know. So im a 15 year old girl in grade 10. For as long as i can remember, ive always felt…worthless and alone. I have lots of friends and family, but i still feel alone. Like something is possibly missing. I always feel like im trapped inside some sort of glass bowl. I can see everyone around me, happy and cheerful. However i cant feel them. There is something seperating us. I know it.
    Im different then everyone else. I dont know how but i am. I get days when everything is alright. But some days are not as good. I dont laugh, i dont smile, i feel like i hate everyone, and like I hate myself. I dont eat. Sometimes this lasts for days, weeks even. People notice sometimes. They ask whats wrong. The answer is always the same; “nothing.” Im sick of saying nothing when it really isn’t. Its everything. Im confused and alone. I’ve lately been not enjoying the activities i used to love. Why do i feel this way? I dont know. What’s wrong with me?
    Sometimes i feel like hurting myself. I use a razor to cut my arms sometimes. Not too deep though. When people ask about the cuts i say that i “got clawed in a basketball game.” They always shrug it off. I dont know why i do this. I have a nice family…so why? I guess i like the pain. It makes me forget about things. Like school, and homework and drama with friends. Just recently ive started wondering what it would be like to kill myself. Would people notice i wasnt there? Would they miss me? Maybe i should try it..but i dont. I think of my little brother and sister. What would happen if i killed myself? They would be alone. What about my parents? They’d be devestated. I didn’t try to kill myself because i need to be there for those that love me, no matter how much pain it puts me through.
    I have no idea what to do. I dont know whats wrong with me. Is this feeling normal? When will it go away? Im sick of being depressed all the time. Why cant i be happy?

  • Tais

    Everyone at my school and home hate me because they think I did something really bad which I didn’t and I tried telling them the truth but they don’t believe me even my family and my best friends don’t believe me. I just don’t what to do anymore, before this happened I was so into life, I loved and I was always laughing and loved myself, but now everything is so different and by hating me they made me hate myself too. I’m only 12 years olds and I wish everything could go back to normal but since it can’t I thing I should just quit living my life, I’m not worth it anyway.

  • Laura 123

    I feel very sad I get angry all the time over silly things. I used to be outgoing and have a good social life. Lately I just want to hide from everyone and just be alone. It’s an effort for me to go to work when I there I pretend everything is ok. I feel like everyone hates me and I’m a disgusting person. I have deleted all my social media as I don’t want to be in contact with anyone. I know my family are worried about me but I just feel too embarrassed to go the doctors. I have been on setraline tablets before as soon as I felt better I stopped taking the medication. I was also referred for counselling but did not go. I don’t know what to do anymore I feel hopeless and that there is no way out. I don’t want to moan to anyone I know because. Don’t want to drag them down. I just want to disappear forever.

  • China

    Ive been feeling lost and confused like its no one in my corner… everybody says its going to be okay but they don’t understand the thoughts in my head or what im going through i cant keep a conversation like others so i beat my self up. Im losing relationships i feel stupid dumb & miserable i just wanna be normal

  • Princess Leah

    Where do I begin? I’ve hated myself since I was a child, probably because everyone in my life – except my immediate family – hated me and said negative things about me. So that’s what I internalized. I think I’m fat and ugly. My boyfriend adores me and treats me like a queen, although, truth be told, I suspect he stays with me for convenience (I have a high paying job.) Speaking of high paying jobs, that’s the only thing in life in good at. I don’t cook because my parents sent me to my room to study whenever they caught me loitering in the kitchen as a teen. So I never developed an interest in cooking. I’m a slow reader, which makes me feel defective. I’m a 35 year old woman with no children, which makes me feel my life is worthless. I work over 12 hours a day, sometimes two weeks in a row, which is exhausting but is a side effect of my profession. I think about suicide so often that I’ve researched methods like they’re going out of style. I’m just too chicken to kill myself. My boyfriend and several friends have told me how devastated they’d be if I was gone, but I’m convinced they’ll get over it. I’m just tired of feeling stressed, overwhelmed, and like I’ve failed in every area of my life except my career. I’m a useless human and don’t know why I’m here. I believe in God, but I’m sure He stopped listening to me long ago…

  • keving10

    I feel so empty so lonely inside.
    I gave up everything for this woman to later find out she keeps pix and messages o his ex because for her he was perfect and then I asked myself why she got with me and I ask her to and she says because she loves me but I trusted her in anything and she messed up .. after 7 months together she’s pregnant but I love her and my beautiful child which I don’t blame because it’s my responsibility but we’ve fought and argued and she gets really crazy one time she ended up in a mental hospital.
    She’s very very stubborn and possessive and controlling .
    As much as I try to revive the relationship she says yes but it just feels different now. Theres no I love you anymore only once in a while once a week … I feel so empty and embarrassed after many times she messed up I kept being with her because I love her but every I love you sounds empty.
    How do I deal with these things ?
    Lonely, disappointed, rejected like I fail to make a good relationship which she messed up .
    Help me please. Should I keep trying ? Leave her ? .. (not my baby)
    I pray every day to the Lord but I feel somethings missing .
    Like he hat answer or the situation isn’t getting any better.
    Some one help me

  • Leanne

    It will get better. I know it will. Just stay strong!!

  • hh

    These comments are so heart wrenching because when i read them i recognise that I have felt the same way in the past but that after about 6 years I am starting to get through it.
    The best things that have worked for me are:
    – Going on a 20mg dose of Citalopram which is both an anti depressant and anti anxiety pill.
    – Doing exercise daily

    These might help you. I really recommend the anti depressants. I was trying to fix everything by myself through exercise, positive thinking, mindfulness, seeing psychologists, seeing my friends and keeping busy, but in the end this was all that worked for me. You just need to try to find the right one for you

  • TheHopeLine

    Dirk, Sounds like you’ve been going through a really tough time. It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help and we’re here for you and truly want to listen to what is going on in your life. We have some great resources we can give you to help you deal your depression and self-harm. A HopeCoach would love to pray with you and help you with the emotional support you need to get through this. Would you be willing to call us or chat with us at TheHopeLine today? We are open 24/7 and all you have to do is call 800.394.4673 or you can chat with one of our HopeCoaches about what is going on at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp . We also have a free app you can download to get help at http://thehope.dm/thlmobileapp

  • Anu

    I want to disappear from this world I feel worthless I’m nearly 34weeks pregnant and I haven’t a single shopping for my baby because I feel me and my baby is a big burden on my husband because he needs to support his family and we both came from nowhere in his life

  • RainbowChicken99

    Ever since two years ago, I’ve always felt like I wasn’t good enough for anything, or anyone. My own mother says things practically meaning “You’re not good enough”; “You’re not working hard enough”. I start hating myself because of this, and I feel like I don’t deserve to be in this world and that there is no reason to live anymore. This might seem dramatic for a 13 year old girl like me, but there are always things other people don’t understand about my life. Even though I feel this every day, I know I mustnt give up on life yet because I still have a whole future ahead of me and it’s my decision whether to have it or not.

  • Kayla

    I have nothing to complaIn about in my life. I have friends, family, food, a place to call home.. For whatever reason, I hate myself. I think I’m fat,ugly, stupid and I’ll never be good enough. People tell me thats not true, but it just makes me believe it more. I think I could do a lot more good for this world if I didn’t exist.

  • amy lorenz

    I find that im breaking down and i know this isnt the real me..but i cant seem to get all theae negative thoughts about myself out of my head. I cry at the drop of a pin..even when im seemingly doing ok suddenly i just start crying. I came home from work on day..left my boyfriwnd of two years..quit my job..im alienating my friends and i have no motivation. Ive thought about death but dont wanna leave people behind. I dream of running away but i dont know to where. It feels like im getting pressure from my family and friends and bf to just deal with things and get back to the way it was. Its not that easy. Ive been trying and everyday i get angrier with myself for being this way. Im completely numb and empty and lost. I dont even know where to begin to pull myself up at.

  • Shreyas

    Thank you for such a wonderful article it really meant everything I am now.People really are good at me sometimes I think that I am a bad person.Thank you so much I will try each step you said.

  • Beenamessallmylife

    . I am a drug addict, a liar, a person I hate. I’ve stolen to support my habits. I told lie after lie to my wife so she finally left but it was three months after my mom passed November 2013. So the last year and change have brought me here. No my addiction started to get ugly 6 years ago. I cant fathom saying this but my mom was diagnosed with cancer and I have done her memory no justice, or good. So again I hate me for not being a good son. She sees who I really am now. I have three beautiful children, they are the only reason I go through this hell. I’ve had a problem since I was a teen with drugs and alcohol. The air force diagnosed me with a personality disorder and discharged me. I’m in a suboxone program but I believe that just keeps me from the street. Now the divorce is final I wont be able to afford to go anymore because of the expense. I started a new job with a meager pay but great schedule so I could see my kids more. Another reason is I was ripping off my employer to support my habit. My wife found out and held it over my head threw this process. I told her before I went into the sub program about everything. Just to try to keep her. 14 years is a long time. So it was fight or flight. We filed bankruptcy and gave up everything those twenty years took to get. I hate myself! I’ve always messed up. I got a DUI in 1999 cleaned up met her got a promotion and moved away to be with her. I was my best those 4/5 years. No drugs no alcohol we had our son and she wanted to move back home and it all went to hell the next 10 years. Last week broke the last straw I think. I totaled my car. Once again I hate myself for screwing one of the things I need to get to work and see my kids. I dont know where to begin to get right because it seems like everything that is gone is all I know. So I feel all your pain and maybe some more. When I break it will be epic.

  • Candylyn

    My Dad didn’t want me. My Mom only stands me for what she can get from me. When I was younger, every guy I liked essentially said I was not worth the trouble and either ignored me or dumped me. My friends are dying left and right. I have kids and a husband but I am scared I am going to mess up with them. I love them and they actually love me. God what do you want from me?

  • Annie

    My name is Annie I hate myself and I am lonely and empty. I have to kids and a husband who wish I looked more skinny. I am frustrated with everything around me . I can’t be a good mother to my kids.

  • jullian

    hi im 18 years old and well i’ve got acne..
    First i want to say that many people would think that acne is not that bad and that it will eventually go away. That is not entirely true. I have severe acne for almost a year now and it knocks your self-esteem level to below zero. After it got worse i’d stop looking into the mirror because i didn’t want to see myself like this. I know it will eventually get better as i get older the hormones will be less active.
    For all the people out there who are battling acne… keep going.. you are not alone

  • Juli

    I hate myself so much. I used to believe that God ut me here for a reason. I had to come through a lot of pain as a child and I always believed all this pain was sent to me so that I become a stronger, a kinder, a more understanding person, and that this strength and kindness will help me do something meaningful, if not great. And now that I’ve grown I realize I have not done any single meaningful thing in my life. I haven’t helped anyone, I haven’t become smart and kind, I haven’t done the things I dreamed of as a kid. The best thing I’ve done so far is refraining from suicide, because it would ruin my mother. But on the other hand I realize that I’m a waste of space and she would have done so much better if I had not been there in the first place. I’m falling apart, my life is just some endless string of crossroads where I always seem to take the wrong turn. I wish I could rewind time and relive at least 5 years differently, but sometimes I feel like that wouldn’t make any difference, as I’d still stay the stupid, weak, complaining and talentless me.

  • Jayda

    At this point I’m looking for anything to help me change how i view myself.

  • Tyler Gilbert

    I have lots of hate towards myself… I constantly doubt myself and am full of anxiety… I am so afraid of the future and of change because I fear what is coming… I over think constantly and I look for acceptance from other people and not myself… I’m at a dead end job and I still live at home.. I get so angry at myself and so down and depressed… All I want is to not live In fear and be confident and not second guess myself all the time.. I want to love myself so that I can love another… I have considered counciling but have never went…

  • claire

    I feel you

  • ;(


  • Pastor’s-kid

    I know God loves me. And I know that he has a purpose for me. I come from a pretty perfect christian family. My dad is a pastor, and I know that my family loves me.
    But there are times when I just don’t believe it… Or I forget or something. There are things I do like about my self, sure, but there are many times where I really just really loath myself. I feel so inadequate some times… Like a failure. Especially if I do poorly on an exam, or waste time, or fall into old temptations that just keep coming back. I have it so much better than a lot of people, but I still feel depressed a lot. I am really good at hiding it. But it’s just smoke and mirrors. I know I should be happy, I should have joy, but I feel depressed a lot. It’s not really sadness per say, but more of a feeling of worthlessness and failure. I am ashamed to admit that there are times when I would rather just die and be over with it. But suicide would be so selfish. It would hurt my family so much, and it would be a big blow to girls who look up to me as a sunday school teacher and camp counselor. I could never do it. But such thoughts sometimes do creep in. It scares me! But when under stress or when I fail at something it just reinforces my self-hate. I don’t feel comfortable talking to my family about it. I haven’t really talked to anyone. I am supposed to be a perfect pastor’s kid, getting straight A’s in college, being a great Sunday school teacher and camp counselor etcetera. But I am not those things. I am a good actress. I doubt anyone knows different. Not even those closest to me.

  • Andrew

    I hate myself as I’m a spotty freak my friends even seem like they hate me because if it’s a joke or anything it’s related to me also they all gang up on me and I just can’t take it what do I do I can’t make new friends as I’m nearly in year 11

  • unknown36

    My whole life i have been told that i am ugly. I have worked very hard to push that aside and say it isnt true. Tonight again someone made a comment about my looks. I am hurt and im so tired of people reminding me of how ugly i am. I know deep down i believe them but i kust dont want to be remineded anymore. Im sorry just needed to get that off my chest.

  • Me

    You explained this really well. I completely understand where you are coming from.

  • TheHopeLine

    TheHopeLine has just created a new Ebook on self-worth http://thehope.dm/selfworthebook. HopeCoaches are here for you 24/7 http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ And they can connect you with counselors, mentors, and other resources. We care about you!

  • Jason

    Trust me I feel pretty worthless right now. College, years of experience and all I can get is a hourly job? Doesn’t help that my wife doesn’t have half the credentials that I have, yet makes almost 3 times as much. I really just don’t know what to do, and neither am I convinced that it matters anymore. Almost 40 btw, just to hammer home the point.

  • well I’m only 14, but I hate myself. society has got to me. I feel ugly and worthless and fat. sure I have above a 4.0 GPA but it doesn’t even seem to have any value compared to beauty or popularity.

  • Fed up with Life

    I have hated myself since I was a kid. Even now up to the age of 35 no matter what I do, nothing goes right. Tired of being single while everyone else has someone, tired of always ending up hating my job because I have become too loyal to companies and get taken advantage of. I can’t even get my own businesses to work because I hate myself so much, I don’t have any confidence in myself to go out and speak to people. It’s just easier to end my life, I have officially given up. Everyone I have met that are successful are good looking etc, even though I gym everyday and eat healthy I just can’t seem to get on the same level. God put people like me here to make good looking people’s life’s easier because people would rather approach them then approach me. Hell, to think that I have never been asked out on a date or even being given a valentines gift…sigh. I realised in business as well that if you don’t have self confidence, you get no where, but how do you build self confidence if you can’t even bear to look in the mirror. I have missed out so much in life because I can’t even swim in public as I am so ashamed of my body, the fat and all the hair, and being short on top of it. People always look down on me and over rule me….time to say goodbye to this evil world, and hope god can answer my questions….

  • joe

    i just wanted to say that you are all worth what you stand for. You can be the person who creates something that other humans will cherish. In this universe were just another species so don’t think that were on top and are being judged by others. In this world we are surrounded by people no smarter than a 5 year old child. We just undergo different stuff in life

  • lk

    And what if i.don’t believe god? Them what are you gonna tell me about self hate

  • DramaIzzy

    I feel like I’m being overdramatic, especially with my name and all. But sometimes, a lot of times now, I find myself just really, really hating myself and the world. I just want to stop. I hate myself when I get freaking 89s and I hate myself when I look in the mirror. I thought about cutting myself but I am too cowardly to do it. LOL

  • L

    I’m a finnish, newly 18 years old girl, and I have hated myself for over 4 years. It started in fifth grade when my “friends” started to comment on my body: “small boobs are ugly”, they said. Come on… I was 11, no eleven year old girl should have to worry about her breast size. anyway, ever since it have all turned worse. I have extremely low self-esteem, I compare myself with everyone, and I suffer from bad panicattacks. I panic and start to cry over small things that the majority of every 18 year old would manage with ease.
    It have even come to the point where I hate myself for not being able to hurt myself/try taking my life, because i’m too scared.
    It’s so stuoid.
    I wish I could find a solution, but as many of you that feel this way knows, it’s an impossible feeling.
    Sorry for my bad english.

  • penelope

    I can honsetly say i do hate myself. I am ugly, im quiet,im not someone fun to be around either. Im stupid. I dont want to sound like i want attention, i just wanna get it off my chest and scream it to the world. Nothing seems to go my way,i wake up thinking great another day to go TRY and learn something. Another day to follow th same routine. Another day to live in fear of something not actually there for normal people.

  • dumbeddown

    i have tried a few times in my life too. i think the last time i tried i gave myself epilepsy. no one knows about this. i have downed so many sleep aids and over the counter pills at once with alcohol but always manage to wake up….whoopie…. just never had the guts to use anything else but pills..glad you have a support system 🙂 wish you well now and always

  • dumbeddown

    autism has that side effect if i recall correctly. you may have a mild form. i believe you have a medical condition not a head condition. after i was alone for some time things would just blurt from my mouth …especially “call me” after a time of silence and nothing to engage in verbally. i then would blow things off like they are part of a song and sing after whatever i said a made up song feeling embarrassed as all hell. i was afraid of dementia r something. often “love you hubby” would spill forth. have not seen him in over 20 yrs and he dumped me. i got a cat and it rarely happens now but i talk to the cat all time. i am afraid of feeding into it making it more of a behavorism or something. don’t believe the spurting outs. mine means nothing. maybe try to play it off my singing after to cover it up like i do. just some ideas hun…i feel ya

  • kimanim77

    Some of my earliest memories are of people some from my own family making fun of me. Mostly because of my looks. I can remember being 9 and hating how i looked hated looking in the mirror i am now 37 soon 38 and still cant stand to look at myself in the mirror. I have had “family” members tell me i was worthless and how ugly i am. I hated school and it was horrible for me. I used to wonder how my mom and dad could stand to look at me. I chose men who were really bad for me they paid attention to me they told me what i wanted to hear the last one was the one to make me decide as long as i hate myself i should not date. I have to learn to love myself for my daughter in no way shape or form do i want her to feel about herself the way i feel about myself. It didn’t help matters that my dad was part native american i am pail and the kids used to tease me about that asking me if he was my real dad and then some of the racial slurs started which only added to my self loathing i started to retreat i started drinking and smoking pot it was a way for me to go numb and not feel anything Now i don’t do that but i still am very reserved around people and i don’t like to be around them for long.I have trouble relating to people i have had people pretend to be friends just to turn on and burn me. I had people pretend to be my friend and invite me to sleep overs only to play tricks on me..I have had so called family members purposely leave me out of things they invite everyone else to then purposely rub it in my face! Really nice especially when my dad had passed away just the week before started to wonder what the hell was so wrong with me.

  • vamsi

    I feel like everyone around me are better than me in everyway and there is absolutely no use by me to anyone. Im not even strong to die.I don’t even feel like there is someone to help me out of this feeling,but sharing my problem with you guys feels good.

  • maggie

    I’m 24 years old and I feel like no one in the world should hate themselves like I do.. some days I’m fine, but it can turn in a second. I feel worthless/useless/ugly/stupid, and I feel like I’m a pain in the rear to everyone I know. Whenever I think maybe I should call a friend when I feel this way I automatically switch to thinking why does anyone want to hear my sob story , what would they care? Why would anyone care about me?

  • TheHopeLine

    Hannah, We want you to know that you matter and you are loved and worthy. You deserve to be treated with respect and love from your brother’s and sister. Please tell an adult about what is going on and that you need help. You are not alone in what you are dealing with…we are here for you…please call 800.394.4673 or go to http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp to chat with a HopeCoach anytime. If you ever feel like you are in danger please call 911 and let them know what is going on in your house.

  • ihateme.

    I feel unhappy & unloved.

    • Kayla

      I feel the same way

  • TheHopeLine

    Clare, A HopeCoach is available 24/7 to chat online or talk to you on the phone. Call 800.394.4673 or to chat go to http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. You are not alone, Clare, a HopeCoach is there to listen.

  • lala

    Im 14 and I hate school and im not doing well in school no matter how hard I try and I hate my teachers. I know I wont get a job whrn im older. I do gymnastics but I started 2 years ago so there is no point in me doing it because I wont get anywhere with it cause its too late. I hate myself!

  • merie

    i don’t really hate myself its just i …….. embrassed of what i did in school!

  • Belle

    I’ve always hated myself. I’ve been rejected by kids always at a young age. I also look at myself and hate what I look at. I suffered from anorexia and being bulimic. No one understands the pain I feel on the inside. I also suffer with severe depression and anxiety and I just don’t know what to do. I have tried self harm, carving, and overdosing. Though they don’t make it much worse they haven’t made it better. I don’t have any hope in life and I’ve tried so hard to overcome it, but it always comes back.

  • Bratista

    I have a husband and two kids, but I just can’t seem to get happy. I love my family, but I am majorly anxious and depressed. I don’t know what to do. I worry excessively about my children, and it makes me miss out on loving them.

  • Robert Davis

    I must practice the same thing day by day. I understand my self worth, an individual, with potentional. Family man, corporate man, architect, whatever I could be. I am a son, and I Dont even see emotions as human rather than complex reactt. This realization gave way to this hole. This hole inside, so large, unbridgeable to me. Its there and shows me the meaningless things and how irrational things are. It festers a hatred for all and even myself. I act on these emotions and can’t stop it but I can control it.
    For years this hole has caused pain. I in my head see what I am and want to be this, but it hurts. It helps me stay strong yet alone. I Dont want this anymore, so for years I have both attempted, planned, and thought about ending it. Knives, the city bridge, freezing to death. I love freezing to death the most, you die in your sleep, very peaceful. But you can have a change of heart, this is not something I want. No, if I am ever driven to the limit that I am to take that last action to ensure the end of my life, I would hang myself. There’s no room and time for a change of heart, and I Dont want to blow my brains out, to messy. I Dont even want to be buried in a box. I want the worms and maggots to eat my corpse after I’m buried. This is my daily struggle. The woods across from my house are beautiful.

  • In The Moment

    You are depressed. It makes everything seem bad and hopeless. I just saw this post. I hope you and anyone that reads this with the same feelings will reach out to someone. There are no perfect people in this world. We all accept.love and understand that with others. Give yourself the same acceptance. Love yourself the way you love and accept the imperfections of those you love and respect. Read and understand depression. Knowledge is a powerful thing. I came very close to ending my life when I was first thrown into a deep depression. I had a friend that called and convinced me I was not the way I perceived myself. I still have bad days but they are getting not as bad and less often. I am becoming à stronger and more confident person the more I learn and do. My strength comes from prayer, healthy foods, exercise, and living in the now. I slurp up joy to the fullest and work daily at throwing out the negative noise I’ve stored in my head. We are all different but truly equal…that includes you.

  • balinne

    I can tell you right now, God made a mistake creating me and allowing me to live. I’ve challenged him to kill me and yet I’m still alive. All that proves is that he’s ignoring me and doesn’t love me at all.

  • Kayla

    I’m just 12 years old and it feels like everyone hates me. I never talk to my mum about it because I don’t want her to worry about me. I always think I’m ugly or I’m fat or somethings wrong with me that people don’t like. I use y’all cry at night because I’m so sad. I always thing people will pick on me the next day or my friends will pick on me. To make matters worse my brothers and sister are mean to me aswell. I say to myself at night “everyone hates me and I have no friends” while crying. What can I do? Should I commit suiside? ( don’t know how to spell it). Can someone please help me?

    • TheHopeLine

      Kayla- We are here for you. When you have those negative feelings, please call one of our HopeCoaches. We are here for you 24/7 for phone or chatting online. http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

      • Kayla

        Thank you but I don’t have a phone and I don’t want my mum to worry about me

        • TheHopeLine

          You can use your computer to chat with a HopeCoach online. We are here for you.

      • Kayla

        I’m feeling better after hearing that thanks

  • TheHopeLine

    Emma, Thank you for reaching out for help. Living in fear is very difficult. It’s important that you talk to someone about what is going on. You are not alone. We are here for you. Please chat with a HopeCoach at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp or call us at 800.394.4673 Know that you are worthy and needed in this world.

  • Kayla

    Emma don’t kill your self I have a friend named Emma and you are awesome you are awesome and pritty. Even though I don’t know you. Actually I might know you. My friend Emma’s last name is dupagne. That could be you. Don’t kill your self. It would be devastating.

  • Kayla

    Don’t be sorry for existing. You are perfect the way you are.😄

  • Christopher

    I thought if I threw myself in front of a car it would all go away but it just makes it worse so don’t be like me and get help

  • TheHopeLine

    Allen, thanks for being open and honest. Chatting with a HopeCoach can help bring clarity, insight, encouragement, and hope. We are here for you 24/7 http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Steve Castonguay

    Sometimes i wish i could just disappear. Its like i am meant to constantly fail, all people i know are getting something out of life in one way or another. Since childhood i had trouble with society in general, being called dumb, laughed at and rejected or tricked by absolutely all the girls i ever tried to get in my whole life. I analyse my life and i realize that i was never really successful at anything, i was diagnosed ADD when i was a kid, so i had to drug myself to appear as “normal” for other people, my academic life is also a total mess, mathematical skill of a retarded 5 year old (can’t even calculate simple numbers mentally), i became so discouraged at math i literally gave it up after a while. I don’t even have my diploma. I’ve wasted all my teenage life with a bunch of fake asshole who didn’t care to the point that they didn’t have any trouble in just leaving me in a ditch, drunk as hell while people threw empty bottle at me. And now the few remaining elementary school friends i have are leaving me behind for some reason i’d rather not know.

    I can literally figure who would be at my funeral…..some family members, some “friends” maybe, but i know most people don’t even remember me at school, most don’t even know i exist.

    The story of a socially anxious, retarded unlucky guy who’s just sheltering himself away from any social interaction until he wither and die without anyone noticing.

  • mark

    hey guys , hard to explain how we all truly feel I think. but I’ll give it a go. I hate the way I look every time I look in the mirror and if it’s not my face then I seem to obsess about another part of my body . and then if Im not thinking about that I’m feeling like a failure in my working career. not sure how much more my head can take of this. I’m traveling atm and should be happy as Larry . I’ve just spent some of the best days of .y life with a girl I met hear but she has just gone back to Germany , now she has gone I’m starting to think loads of bad shit “I should have done this , I should have done that”!!!! I’m in a constant battle mentally and feel like screaming . I often think about topping myself but doubt I could ever really do it . do most people think about this ?? doubt it . feels good to write this down. best of luck people !! all the best . Mark.

  • Vince Gotti

    Stop caring what others think and find out what your passion is and embrace it.

  • Don’t give up! You have so many more years and places to meet people – like college or at a job. Chat with a HopeCoach about the future and find hope! http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Bryan

    God doesn’t care about me, he’s too busy with other things.

    I tried so hard in life to get something, anything but I always end up on the losing end.

    I read this blog and it doesn’t help me at all, I still feel empty and alone all I want to do is disappear.

    Why can’t I find love? Why am I always the one being told I’m a great guy and I have great points about me but no one wants me…?

    Why am I killing myself at work only to not be able to make a dent in my debt?

    Things are easy for everyone else honestly, I will try exactly what they did and nothing good comes from it for me…

    I wish I was never born or at least dead, I’m tired of all of this…

    • Bryan, We understand that you are feeling really down about yourself and that you feel all alone in this. You are not alone. We care and it may not seem like it now, but God does care about you. It sounds like you may be suffering from some depression. Have you talked to a doctor about how you are feeling? It’s okay to reach out and talk to a professional about how you are feeling to get you to a place that you feel better about yourself. Chat with a HopeCoach and we’ll help you take the steps to get there. http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  • vp

    I know from experience that being myself drives people away. So I hate myself both for being a fraud and for the real me being unloveable

  • Megan

    I hate myself because theres nothing special about me .i dissapoint every one i always mess stuff up its my fault i should try harder

  • Megan

    I know this might not mean much but i hope you find joy you seem nice and im sorry for what happened to you all of it

  • Everything TheHopeLine® offers is FREE. All of the eBooks are completely free. Our chat line is open 24/7 for free. We are here to help because we care. Many of us have dealt with these same issues and struggles we write about and we understand how much it means to have someone to talk to.

  • Sometimes to helps to talk to someone. Our HopeCoaches are here for you 24/7 to chat online. All chats are anonymous and free. http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Talenna Prine

    I know just how Sophie feels and the girl up at the top of the page. I truly do wish I could be with Jesus instead of down here in this extremely cruel and unjust world.. I had in my mind that my children were in good hands nobody needed me anymore everything was my fault I was a horrible mother that didn’t deserve to have my kids again.. So the suicide attempts began I was in and out of the psyc hospitals 7 times so I was told from beginning of March 2013 – July 26, 2013, I was then made to stay. After 2 months of being there I was placed in a RCF for 2 yrs..

  • Hi

    I am not sure where to go or what to do with myself. I hate myself everyday. I am a horrible person inside and out. I can’t change things in my life that has happened to me. My biological father physically, sexually, and emotionally abused my sister and I. I can’t stop the guilt of my sister getting it worst than I did because I am the younger one. I was in foster care most of my life. I put myself in foster care because around the time my uncle passed away I was living with my grandma and she turned into a raging alcoholic. She would make me stay up with her on school nights, and criticize me over and over. Just making pushing my further into depression. And make me go to school the next day without getting enough sleep. I committed suicide because I couldn’t handle the pain anymore. It was mostly a cry for help. When I was 13 I was really bad into drugs.

  • Elise

    I hate myself because I know I’m too selfish to ever have real charity. Every time I’m doing it, even when I genuinely want to, there is a voice in the back of my head that is saying, “I don’t want to be here. I want to be at home. Alone. Away from all you people. I DON’T WANT TO BE HERE.” And, because of that, I know I can never fall in love because I’m too damn selfish. Somehow, people like me, and I want to scream at them and tell them they don’t know the real me; the real me doesn’t want to talk to them or even be around them. I would rather be alone. And yet, I am horribly lonely and want nothing more than to have someone to lean into at the end of the day, but it won’t happen because of who I am. That’s why I hate myself.

  • Emily

    I am 15. I blame myself everyday for being raped and abused and my father’s drinking or my mom not thinking im gold enough.. I suffer from these things. Sure I may find myself ugly at times or want to do something bad but I honestly believe people only hate themselves because they blame themselves for the mistakes others made or they want attention that’s the simple truth of it . There’s no reason for anyone to hate themselves. I see it happen alot in highschool people give up on themselves or cut for attention or because they think it makes things better it doesn’t though..

  • Ippsjsj

    I hate me I don’t know what to do I hate my past and probably my future

  • Kathryn Mcdonald

    What do you do when you can’t even support yourself? I am a good worker. a smart person – I started a PhD in mathematics. I try so hard . . . I apply for 3 jobs every day, and I can’t get work? I’m living on the streets. I have no money. I want enough to live off. How can I not hate myself if I can’t even find a way to live?

  • Dequan Johnson

    I am coming from a vary painful past and a terrible childhood.I have been under control of my stepdad for 8 years as he beat me and locked me in my room,only to be out for school.I never really had much stuff no tv or electronics never really had a froend.However I recently moved to live with my real dad and everything is fine.Except I don’t know how to be happy and I’ve always hated myself with low self-esteem.I always thought I was ugly and stopped speeking.I fell like I keep screwing up with small things now and I can never sleep at night because of bad memories.I’m doing well and screwing up at the same time. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror when everyone says I look fine. I don’t know what to do.

    • casey

      I’m sorry to hear that happened to you. It is very sad. No child ever deserves it. Your feelings are perfectly normal. That man made you doubt yourself-even when you did good things, you were punished constantly, so nothing was ever right. I hope you can look at a child at the age you were when the abuse started and see how small and vulnerable they/you are/were. Maybe then you can really understand who did everything wrong-the stepdad! Children are supposed to make mistakes to learn from, and should be met with kindness-not cruelty. I hope you can forgive just to get past it. You don’t have to forget. Forgiveness helps you, anger would only hurt you more-not the monster that was supposed to protect you. Talk to a good counselor. Not all are good-so if you don’t like the first one keep looking until you get a good one. Make sure to tell your Dad how you feel!

    • casey

      I’m sorry to hear that happened to you. It is very sad. No child ever deserves it. Your feelings are perfectly normal. That man made you doubt yourself-even when you did good things, you were punished constantly, so nothing was ever right. I hope you can look at a child at the age you were when the abuse started and see how small and vulnerable they/you are/were. Maybe then you can really understand who did everything wrong-the stepdad! Children are supposed to make mistakes to learn from, and should be met with kindness-not cruelty. I hope you can forgive just to get past it. You don’t have to forget. Forgiveness helps you, anger would only hurt you more-not the monster that was supposed to protect you. Talk to a good counselor. Not all are good-so if you don’t like the first one keep looking until you get a good one. Make sure to tell your Dad how you feel!

  • Life Sucks

    My family says Im supposed to change the world one day by doing something great, but everyone thinks im stupid i can’t help by saying I hate myself. Im going through to much right now and I can’t take this any longer

  • Brent Evans

    My girlfriend I have been on rough patch. Both feeling like we have no idea who we are, where we’re going, and what to even do with ourselves. She sent an inappropriate picture of herself to another man, hated herself for it because it was just a cry for help for me, and pleaded for me to stay with her. We worked everything out. We don’t hate ourselves anymore. And, somehow, our relationship has never been better… The way things work are weird. But, I don’t know how, but I couldn’t be happier.

  • graclynn

    Hi if ur hearing this it means u have a life in 2015 I still hate myself and I’m nine any ansers reply.

  • Alex

    I’m 22 now and I’m about to graduate college. Although I recognize that I have had many achievements and things to be happy about, I’m insecure and hate myself to a certain extent, depending upon on my circumstances and what happening in my life. I come from a traumatically dysfunctional and economically insecure household which saw my trust, wealth, and security shatter over time. Some things I recognize to be out of my control, but I still blame myself for not being able to hedge against it. I reflect on the past and see who I was at certain points, particularly in my teen years as being tragically dull, uninspired, and humiliating at how i embarrassed myself and the friendships that shattered my sense of belonging and connection to others. As I look forward to my future, I see it hard to find good work that will help me pay for what I need and get out on my own and head in a direction i’d like to see for myself. School has taken a bit long to finish but now I head out i find it hard to leave it behind since the transition from college to work is unclear.

  • Tdior

    every single i tear myself apart, ill get high on anything and usually get drunk. i have no friends and my girlfreind has been cheating on me and i just found out. i try talking to other girls and they seem to absolutely despise me. everyone i have called a friend has either lied or stole from me. and i feel as if everyone is pointing and laughing at me or thinking to themselves that im an ugly ass freak. i have nobody i can talk to and my family will just laugh at me if i tell them. im also a dropout. which doesnt help me besides the fact i have accomplished litterally nothing in my life, i dont hate my life, i hate myself becuase i know people think im weird and that they hate me, but i dont know what i ever did to anyone. all i want to do is get high and go to work everyday, but even thats becoming a struggle because im tearing myself to peices every single day, i can never smile. i have to fake it for work as a cashier. but i dont smile in pictures, i dont smile if im somehow entertained. i just feel like an empty bag of skin. im starting to not care anymore, i dont care about anything. i dont wanna kill myself, but if i saw a semi truck going full speed at me, i think i wouldnt move and just stand there.

  • pam

    I dont hate myself but i dislike myself. Im very bad at talking to people i fancy. I get nervous and talk crap and then they think im weird

  • Connie Socia

    I knuckle under to everyone of my in-laws

  • Alyson

    I’m struggling… a lot.Everything should be fine. I just moved out of my parents’ home into a new one with my best friend and her boyfriend. I’m finishing high school. I was always taken care of. However, I am severely depressed. I cry on my way to school everyday. I cannot stand to sit there for 8 hours continuously anymore without having a panic attack, so I have been skipping the classes I don’t need to graduate. Everybody is telling me I’m so close to being done, but it doesn’t matter to me anymore. I’m going to finish my last quarter at an alternative school, a place I never expected to go. I’ve been watching my school’s dance team and it only reminds me of when I was on it. I was so stressed with the whole weight of the world so I had to quit dance and now I have nothing left. I sit at home, go to school, and go to work. I try so hard to do things I used to love, but that just causes me to be stressed. It’s a never ending circle of pain. I don’t even have any motivation to do any of it at all. I’m trying so, so hard to feel better. I’m trying to do things that used to make me happy like my therapist and parents and teachers told me to do, but nothing is there. My father thinks I can just snap out of it but he doesn’t understand. I feel sick. People tell me there are people worse off than me, but would they say to people that have cancer to stop complaining because someone else has worse cancer than them?!? It’s like they don’t even want to understand. I feel like I’m dying. My head is spinning. I just want someone to understand. I don’t want to feel alone because if I’m alone, I have to spend time with myself and I don’t like myself. If I’m not alone at least I can pretend… right? I fear being alone but it feels inevitable. I’m typing this so hopefully I, or any other person, can understand, but my words cannot match my feelings. This isn’t about school, or dance. This is about me and how I hate me. I’m struggling to get out of this hole and the gravel is slipping through my fingers. I want out! To be or not to be… I just want it all to go away, I almost don’t care what it takes. I didn’t sign up for this. Why am I forced into it? I’m discovering deeper parts of me that I don’t like and I’m scared.

    • It sounds like you are really in a state of deep depression and we understand. This isn’t something you can just “snap out of” like your dad thinks. There is real help and we can connect you with the resources you need. We are here to listen and understand. Chat with a HopeCoach 24/7 for free – http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Sexiladi

    I hate myself and want to die

  • little me

    I hate myself. I hate the way I look, the way I want to be loved, the way I can’t stand so many things like television, pop culture and movies. I feel tormented by everything I see and I wish I was so much more than what I am. I know I should be happy with what I have. I shouldn’t be unhappy because I have a roof over my head and food in the fridge but God I feel so alone in my heart. Sometimes I’m really glad I don’t have access to a gun because I think I might shoot myself if I did. I cry a lot a night when my boyfriend is asleep. We’ve been together for ~4 years but I feel like we don’t really ‘know’ each other. I don’t think he understands how much I need him to help me fill the dark hole inside my mind. I love him but he doesn’t love how sad I am all the time 🙁
    I don’t like being sad either.

  • That’s great! I am so glad it cheered you up! If you ever want to chat about it we are here for you 24/7 http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • I am so sorry you are feeling this way and it sounds like your girlfriend is a negative voice in your life. We are here to encourage and give you hope. Please chat with us anytime 24/7. http://www.thehopeline.com/GetHelp/ Please don’t give up.

  • You CAN make it through this season of despair. You might be suffering from depression, which can make everything look like it has a black cloud hanging over it. Chat with us online and tell us more about your struggle. We are here to give you hope and to connect you with resources to set your life on a better path. We believe in you! http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • I can tell that you are a loving mom, because of your love and concern for your own children. When we have had a difficult childhood sometimes having children can bring up a lot of emotions from the past to the surface (like insecurity, worthlessness, powerless). This is normal and there is help. Looking at the past from an adult perspective and especially as a mom can help you heal. The things that happened to you were not your fault. Please chat with us online to continue the conversation and to find hope and healing. You are on the right path! http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • That doesn’t sound like you are huge at all. I am sorry you are struggling with how you feel about yourself. Sometimes our self-image comes from negative people in our life, but it’s not the truth about who we really are. We want to listen and encourage. Please chat with us online anytime 24/7 http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Riley

    I have some days where I’m happy but then I have days where I hate myself and I get bullied and think I should just end my life and I hate feeling this way but I don’t know what to do anymore

  • Me

    I hate myself a lot and I know it is unlogical and i hate myself even more because of that

  • sadaf

    I think whatever I do it turns to ash! im suck at everything and I cant handle it anymore! I feel sorry for my mum and dad
    i don’t know what to do any more and i really really need help!

  • John

    I hate myself because i feel i dont deserve what i have. I am told i am lucky by family and have everything i could ever want but i am not happy. Its not that i want more because i dont, and i would never ever ask for more of anyone else, i am just not happy. I fake smiles everywhere i go (known as the person who always laughs and is always happy) but even after a long time of faking it until you make it acting doesnt cut it anymore. I also will not tell ANYONE because i know how rare happiness can be amd i dont want to take them away from theirs. The stress im under is a million times worse then my siblings and they admit that it is too. My mom expects me to be perfect in everyway. I brought home a grade of 98 and went overjoyed to show her and instead of receiving a good job i got a long talk about how i needed to “strive for perfection” versus when one of my siblings got a 90 (in a easy class) my mom was overjoyed and gave them praise. I cant sleep at night, i told my parents and they said to close my eyes and ill be fine. I get on average 5 ours of sleep and spend about 4 hours trying to fall asleep every single night, and when i do sleep its nightmares.The chores, expectations, problems, and stress break me down inside and i cant help but feeling like:
    wow, whats wrong with me?
    I have a desire to be smart, to be strong, and to most of all, to be happy; I can never get there if what im facing wont leave me be.

  • Wilson

    I just wake up finding I don’t want to live.All the people around me don’t care and don’t talk to me sweetly.For many hours and days I even haven’t open my mouth to talk except eating food and drinking water.Every day you should be punctual and come regularly to work.I can even feel the loneliness in my heart it is like melting and breaking to pieces.After working hard in the day feeling fatigue.No rewards no gratitude no appreciation no buddy to talk or make fun by sharing our experiences.At the end I feel like to blame my parents for having me in this world.But they are no more and I have to continue with my rustic life till the end

  • We are here for you 24/7. We want to help with practical resources. https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  • Omar

    A thoughtful article about the subject. It sheds some light on some of key points that can help left me up or reflect. I reach to this site while searching Google under the subject “I hate who I am”. I don’t hate my-self! I hate the way I am. I can’t catch all the points that support this feeling. When I write something concerning the situation, something else jumps into my mind. It looks like an endless process! This attack on my-self should be stopped. It is not me who fires on me! I think I need a support of someone. Someone knowledgeable/ a specialist. At least to help me nail down those disturbing thoughts/ opinions/ feelings, figure them out clearly, arrange them and get rid of them step by step as per their effect and contribution to my situation. The article need to be read frequently. Thanks for sharing this article with us :).

    • Michelle Palmer

      I think most people these days need to seek out professional help. Like see a psychiatrist or physiologist. I did. There’s nothing wrong with it

  • howtohope

    I am a 15 year old student. Since my early years i have been told by my dear ones that i am a girl full of talents and potentials. i guess that is true, too. But the thing is that i can’t concentrate on my studies AT ALL! As a result, i am not as good a student as i was(and should be). I stay in front of the books all day, not getting anything in my head. I am intelligent in cases of problems, but what use is talent if not supplemented by work? Since i stay fixed at my place all day, i also dont get to do any physical activity, and hence i am very fat (so ugly looking). I know i can change all this, but i am so depressed that i just cant get myself moving. I get so depressed and a majority of my time gets wasted on crying. All i want is to hibernate for something like, oh, 30 years maybe? I know this is really a pathetic state of mind. Some help maybe?

  • This is one of our partner resources – http://beneaththeskinonline.org/ – Like you they are passionate about getting away from technology to have face-to-face time. When you chat with a HopeCoach we can connect you with them.

  • Have you been able to talk to your parents about your depression? It’s important that you reach out and tell someone. There are many things you can do to help your with depression. Please know that you are not alone in how you are feeling. There is hope and there is help. We have a free ebook you can download for help in understanding depression at http://info.thehopeline.com/depression-ebook. A HopeCoach would love to chat online with you to help you with this at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  • You ARE worth something. It sounds like maybe you have surrounded by some negative people. Leet us listen and encourage you. We are here anytime 24/7 https://www.thehopeline.com/GetHelp/

  • Anonymous

    I am 14. I hate myself. I suck at school, I lie, and I feel like no one loves me. I feel drained, empty. I accepted Jesus into my heart a few years ago, but now I feel like He’s abandoned me. I have suicidal thoughts every night and it is so exhausting trying not to give in. I feel like I can’t help my family enough (we are broke). Can anyone relate to me? I need help badly, but I can’t let my parents know.

  • Ms Social

    Hi i am a 13 year-old girl in middle school. I woudnt say I hate myself, I just am insecure and unhappy with myself. Not necessarily because of my looks, although thats not even great (I am short, flat, and not very pretty) but more of my personality. I am shy. I am not good at being social and keeping a conversation with people I don’t really know or a boy I never talk to. When I do talk, I feel like everything I say is weird and that they will somehow judge me for it. So many people around me, whether they are my friends, classmates, or even family members are so outgoing and are known and liked by everyone. They always know what to say and how to react to people and things. I don’t. I just wish I could be “Ms Social” and be friends with everyone but I don’t know how. Sometimes I tell myself its just a phase and I will become more outgoing as I grow up, but thats not very comforting. I just wish I could change and be more like other people naturally. Everyone always says “What matters is on the inside, not the out” but what if what is on the inside isn’t even that great? Then what?
    I know this isn’t as serious as other people on this website but it still feels good to write my feelings that are 100% genuine and hopefully get some replies. Thank you.

  • Jasmine

    i hate myself. It started when my parents started to lose trust in me everytime i mess up even one grade i feel like i cant do anything right i hate myself it’s the only thing i know about myself

  • There is hope and help. Those feelings can really go away. Please chat with a HopeCoach – simply click on the “chat now” button. We are here for you 24/7.

  • thatsad17yearoldgirl

    i hate my life i hate myself i love my family and thats all that keeps me going but i am sad everyday and if i end my life wich would make me happy, it would make he ones i love unhappy so i feel i cant do it and n one wants me to. my counsellors tell me not to and advise safe self harm but i dont honestly care anymore im sick of being sick im tired of being tired and im done with dissapointment. i dont wanna wake up in a morning so why should i? who says i have to get up and go out to college and work and religious meetings and see friemds? i know there was a time i wanted to and i devoted my life to these things and brought pleasure to my god, my friends and family. that made me happy but now i dont want to. i want to do what i want to do and i know i cant and i shouldnt so i dont want to live through this mental conflict anymore i cant be bothered. i dont want to do aything but sleep. when i sleep i dream and i get away fromy real life and real problems i fce and issues i have to endure. i know i have anxiety and depression maybe something on top oof that but i dont care theres no ecxuse for my thoughts and behaviour now. i am ruining my famly life and upsetting my friends and everything is my fault. theyd be better ooff without me and ive felt like this for 3 years now and every time i have tried to pray or better my self and fix my life or even end my life it never works i just wake up sad and tired and alone. i dont want to put up with this cycle anymore. leave me be. what do i do? do i keep tying? keep going? and one day life will be better? heard it all before. it never lasts. people always let me down and i disappoint others as a result. if i wasnt a part of this worl anymore sure it would be hard at first but everyone would get over it and forgt eventually. so i should go and do it now. 4 times isnt enough is it? i cant even kill myseelf well. i am useless at everything. what is the point of my life? when all i do and am good at is bringing negativity to those i love? im stupid i am useless and not worth anything. i should go die in a ditch somehwere i wouldn make a differenc to the world i live in. life is hard and i cant cope. i am not good enough for wht i have. i dont deserrve nything

  • david

    i really do hate myself, im ugly, a little fat, straight up cringey, i dont have many friends, i have a problem with not sleeping, i dont know why my friends even like me as a friend or treat me the way they do, they are just so nice, thats why i dont have many friends, because there is not many people in this world who can be nice like them, i just wish i could be in heaven or something or at least restart life with no memory of this one.*sigh* 🙁

  • lishay

    I hate myself cus I fail so much
    I just act in a stupid way
    I make other people hurt and I keep breaking promises…
    no one cares about me… me neither
    I’m just a stupid piece of $%@*

  • Catie

    here is a thing from me and a message from God that i will copy
    when your hurt or sad or depressed come to me i care for you i have put my life on risk i was born in a stable named by angels and i Jesus God belive that you can do anything Hers something from me
    if you feel down and you cant hold yourself up its best to think about something amazing or something you would like to do in your future or family friends (just maybe not passed on ones) i hated my self for every reason i thought i was hated by everyone i met i thought i wasnt made to be here i thought i was ugly and uwanted sometimes i just wanted to have a knife and go to someone who cared and someone i knew My parents and sister have always helped me and i am very thankful for that please know that you are perfect and dont let anbody hold you down beacuase you are the only one who can get up so next time you are down know that God cares and your family cares and passed family is up there watching you then hope that you can stop this they care.

  • Lisa Martin

    i hate myself i feel worthless and stupid i feel like im a bad person it hurts i bury my feelings i hide my sadness by watching youtube and telling stupid jokes i grew up in a family that treated me like an unwanted outsider and i feel that way now too i live with my aunt and uncle now because the neglect was on the levels of abuse i didnt even know how to do basic hygene because noone ever loved me enough to ever teach me ive lived with them for about 5 years and love them both with everything i have ive learned alot but i have no social skills due to abuse (verbal emotional psycological and sexual) i have a huge fear of people therefor i cant get a job i even had to drop out of school because of this ive had people tell me they think i have aspergers syndrome i try to help around the house but my memories getting bad or something because i keep forgetting to do stuff my aunt lately has been getting mad at me alot and keeps saying im lazy and each time it breaks my heart more and more im trying i really am but i just forget stuff sometimes im trying i really am but i think my aunt and uncle r starting to hate me too i dont know what to do anymore i dont wanna get outta bed anymore i dont wanna hurt anymore but thats all i do i feel like my aunt and uncle r gonna throw me out and if that happens then i will truly have noone i wll just give up someone please tell me what to do someone please make the pain stop someone please help me…..

  • Tyler

    I feel like garbage. I’m 21 and have hurt and deceived so many people over the course of 7 years. I know I still do but I am unaware of who I hurt. I had contemplated suicide once, mainly because of my self hatred and my status as an outcast. Even today I am trash being tossed around. I’m so sick of this feeling but have given up. I feel it’s society that made me feel like this. I don’t know anymore, all I do know is that this feeling is never disappearing and all of the times I really try it gets even worse.

  • PanMarie

    For a long time now I’ve been struggling to cope with the fact that I’ve hurt some people and will continue to hurt people with my words or my attitude. This coming from me anyone would think I’m not a good person and I just say and do whatever I please without concern for others. I sincerely believe I’m not like that. In fact I’ve repeatedly had some people tell me I’m a nice person. I care about how people feel. I always try to act in a manner that would please everybody. But sometimes I just find myself in a situation where people would ignore me because apparently I’ve said or done something that offended them. I don’t know why I’m like this and I hate myself for who I am. How could a ‘nice’ person as they say be capable of saying hurtful things?

  • lala

    I dont know why i feel like this. This also feels weird writing down, but probably nobody is gonna read this cringy text anyways. I feel terrible. For the past months i just feel like i havent been taking care of myself as i should. I guess i should change something, but i guess i dont want to. Do i like being miserable? Im actually talking to myself haha . I wait to get home annd force myself to cry in the hope of feeling better , didnt work yet but maybe next time. Im not doing anything productive. I think people think im dumb because of the way i present myself, but really i feel like a wise person. I rather present myself as a dumb person, it makes people open up more and be less cautious knowing theyre not going to be judged by a wiseass. I actually have no ide what im writing. This is random thoughts. Did i just invent a form of self therapy? If this helps me then yes.. I feel like i have no future. I am young, very actually. I am hoping and planning on being extremely happy in about a year. I am gonna be done with school. I feel like im finally going to feel free. Whatever that is, and however that feels. I see myself being extremely happy, the ultimate feeling. But deep down i think im lying to myself. Im either going to be extremely happy or just plain sad. Its weird, i can only see myself as either one extreme. Never in the middle. Am i gonna end up homeless because of my decisions? Am i gonna make the right decisions? I have the capacity of making something great. But im slowly killing myself from inside and draining all my power out. I am wasting time money and talent. I should be happy with what i have. I should be happy i have a talent and something im good at. I should get better at it. How do i keep my mind off of dark thoughts? When i am happy, how do i stay hapy? Do i think too much? Or too little? Or wrong? Does my mind work and think in the same way as others? I want to be happy. I wish many things never happened. I have to accept i have no control over certain things. I often think of power and control. Its an interesting concept. Who has the power/control in specific situations? How theese things switch or are blurred lines or illusions. Does anyone really have control over anything? I am not helping myself by writing this right now .. hey if you read till here good job.. sometimes i wish i could stop time . Or just disappear as if i never existed. And its not even in horrible situations that i think this. Thats weird. I want to challenge myself. Push myself . Start doing things i wish to. Be honest. Stop masking my feelings. Its hard to do that. I feel terrible because whenever i sspeak my mind i uset my family. I hate myslf for it. I cant think of an example, but its not insulting or sth like that.. There are so many crazy things in life really. Well in mine at least. Im fascinated with two-facedness. Also the way we can ignore things, or forget, or move on. Its a powerful mind. I see people on the streets and trains every day and nobody looks happy. Is this my fate? Nobody is happy. It looks horrible. I dont want to be the way they are. Live to survive. I want to live and enjoy andbe happy and not harm anyone and escape the problems of current reality. School systems are strange. There are so many things strage on our planet. I like to think of the people of the future and the way they would think of us. Primitive? Authoritarian? Naive? Angry? Forcing? Unhappy? … i wonder how im gonna look when im lod, if im gonna be alive, will i have a family, what kind of man is my husband? Am i happy? Will i remember my current self, being this way? Will i think of myself silly, will i ave self pitty? Who do i blame this on? Am i this way because of myself or others? Oh and, am i crazy? Like , how do you define a crazy person? Its strange when you think about it, how definitions change, statuses, ond day you might be a regar person annd the next youre called crazy and your credibility’s on the line. Just imagine,anything you say is dismissed , because youre defined crazy. Even if you try disprove your status you cant, because youre crazy. Its strange how people tend to look for and find comfort in finding causes for effects. Why something halens, we make our own causes. I dont know what to do but i hate being stuck in this state of mind. I dont know what to try.

  • Em

    For a long time I have felt, and still feel, that no one would miss me if I were to die. That even if they did, they would get over it soon enough because I’m just another mouth to feed, and there’s so many bad things about me. I still feel this way, even though whenever I speak up about it people always deny it and say that I’m awesome or cool or that they’d miss me. Anytime that happens it makes me think of the phrase “actions speak louder than words”. So, that leads to my questions. If someone doesn’t show that they care about you, even if they say it verbally, should you still hold onto them? Especially if they are family or close friends? Should you keep living with people who say they care for you, but never show it? Should you tolerate or even accept that those closest to you, even friends and family, are the reason that you want to self harm and end things? How do you move past that when you can’t tell them, or when you can’t leave them either?

  • Em

    And if you do have to live with it, how do you stand the verbal and emotional abuse? When all they do is say that it’s your fault or that you’re overreacting, and if they do apologize, its just a brief, nonchalant, “sorry?” as though they don’t even mean it, and they don’t because they don’t change their actions to match their apology.

  • Aniketh

    I hate myself because I feel like I lie a lot, but there is nothing I can do to fix it

  • No One

    I hate myself. I’m fat and I hate myself for letting it happen but the person who is meant to be their for me (which I hate) always calls me fat, fat, FAT!! I feel like starving myself just so I don’t have to be fat anymore!

  • Marysa Kellis

    God never abandons you. No matter how much you think he does, God will never leave you. He loves everyone so much and gave up his son for OUR sins! When you think God leaves you, just pray harder, and trust me, he will answer your prayers.

    • Melissa Gaydos


  • Isis estrada

    I don’t honestly have a reason to feel depressed sometimes. I think that when someone says the littlest things to me , I image this whole reality were something absouluty bad happens, and I’ve talked to many people about it, but still I feel like carp. I guess its just carving for attention, or I don’t like being proved wrong , or sounding dumb. Some things I’ve done in the past, effect me today. Like back at my school. I was a pretty dumb and stupid looking kid who did gross things and embarrassing things. At the time I didn’t care what people were thinking of me, but now I look back at it and say “why did you that”. Which is probably one reason why I hated myself The next reason would be appearance. People say I have a nice face(some people ) but, in my reality, I have a face only my family could love. I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like ai like it. Since everyone gives me attention for being depressed, and I don’t know where the depression comes froms. And I get emotional and sad off of little and dumb things. I think I just need to say to myself. Wake up, and Shut up, and get moving. Snap out of it.

  • Shealtiel Levi

    I love my wife to death we had bad times and good times she cheated on me many times so for pay back I started going on website to piss her off we live together sleep in the same bed I thought things was.going good until she told someone I love u that took my bReath away like I had pains in my chest sharp pains tears coming down even when I dont want to cry after all this I still love her iam not ready to let her go we have kids n been marry for ten years

  • lauren

    I have never liked whome I am I dont know why really I jiust feel like I cant do anythong and everthing I do seems to be wrong, at school I was bullied and I hated my self even more I was called fat and even worst names and I started to believe them now I am 19 I just cant see anything good about me and whome I am

  • Howard

    All day everyday I feel stupid and ugly. I am balding pretty bad but I always wear a hat. People comment all the time do you ever take your hat off or do you wash that thing. I feel like a joke that everyone is laughing at. I don’t go out with friends or co workers because I’m afraid the subject of me always wearing my hat will come up and people will find out I’m balding. It really has toking a toll on my self e

  • Rina

    I’m only 12 years old and although I know that the problems I face in my life are most likely minuscule compared to others, I find it unfair how many people will believe that kids my age do not have problems of their own. The nights when I only get 2 hours of sleep for various reasons are the nights that I suffer the most, and then when I go to school, teachers ask me why I seem so tired. I tell them I only slept two or three hours, and I’m met with the same typical answer: You did not only get two or three hours. Only my health teacher and counselor seem to know that I tell the truth.
    Today, my parents told me that I was a waste of everybody’s time and energy. They say that they don’t believe that I try hard, because sometimes results just don’t end up the way that either of us want. I feel useless because I don’t want them to be wasting their time, energy, or money on me, to let it fall short.
    As I stood there being reprimanded today, I had an urge inside me to walk to the utensils drawer and get a knife and stab myself. I didn’t know where this urge had suddenly stemmed from, but it did. However, I fought the urge and told myself that killing myself would only be a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
    I do wish I was someone else. I’m compared to everyone, and it makes me feel like trash when someone chooses another over me. I hate the words:
    “I would trade you out for anyone else”, yet it seems to be something I hear too often.
    I have one guy friend that’s older than me, that I talk to all the time. He’s the person I vent to if I ever need to vent, yet it’s starting to seem as if he doesn’t care, and would rather that I left him alone. So, I did. It didn’t seem to bother him the slightest.
    Maybe no one cares about me, then. It’s hard to believe otherwise.

  • Mariah

    I hate myself…
    Usually my family and most of my friends take that statement as a joke, but it’s very true. I feel like I won’t ever add up to anything important in life and that I’d never find my significant other, nor do I deserve one. I always thing that everything I do it a failure and that it’s my fault. a few of my good friends compliment me and everything I do and it makes me feel worse. I feel like they just they nice things to make me happy.
    One of the worst things is that I can’t take rejection and mistakes easily. It makes me feel incompetent and that I shouldn’t do anything in life because I’ll just mess everything up and end up in a massive hellhole full of personal problems, and self hate. But it’s not just me, I feel like I’m holding everyone back and that I’m just a pain to them. I want them to be happy, happy without me because I know I’m not gonna live long in the world.

  • Ana

    i dont know why im so depressed…maybe from everything people have done….i dont understand why i cant be happy or why it takes so much energy to smile. everything i used to love doesnt seem interesting…i starve myself because my best friend and boyfriend jokingly called me fat when i was eating lunch…i cut myself to release the pain but i dont know how much more i can take of this self hate everyone thinks its only for attention but believe me thats the last thing i want is attention…

  • Ana

    i know i have nothing absolutly nothing to be depressed about. i have aloving and understanding boyfriend. an amazing and beautiful best friend and a loving family so why? i dont understand…

  • Sophia Roberts

    I want to be ok because my life isn’t too bad. I feel ungrateful for hating myself and thinking about
    how hard my life is. I have a lowing family and friends yet I can’t seem to keep myself in reality long enough to interact and feel anything. I try everyday to make myself feel something other than despair but I can’t because I constantly see the bad, constantly feel myself getting mad at the smallest of things and constantly find an excuse to get out of breaking away from this chain such as “they hate me” “he’ll never like me”. My self hating personality has gotten in the way of so many friendships and relationships. I must admit apprarance wise I do think I’m attractive but I hate my personality. It ruins everything for me. I can’t even enjoy my looks without thinking about how much it doesn’t even matter cause no one really like me anyways

  • Diggy Crawlies

    What is the purpose of life?

  • IDon’tEvenDeserveMyBirthName

    I am 18 and in college. I have everything I ever needed. I have a very very loving family who supports all my needs. My friends are awesome. Whatever I pray to God, I receive. BUT………..that’s the thing. I DON’t Deserve all this. I do bad things everyday and I say sorry everytime but it’s been a lot of those times and I feel so bad for always doing them knowing I can easily get away from them by a simple sorry. Now I almost couldn’t reach out to God because I am too ashamed. I feel like every second of my life, I’m a disappointment to my parents. I don’t tell them my problems especially my failures. I don’t want them to finally realize how big of a disappointment I am. I always made them proud. I didn’t wanna change all that. Now everytime I fail no matter how small it is, I always beat myself and think I’m tired of putting up with myself. why am I like this? it’s like I’m possessed because I I feel like i cannot control my actions and decisions and I just watch myself failing and messing up. Everytime I do something and fail, i always knew I could’ve done better. and that’s what I’m mad about myself. I know what to do and how to do it BUT I STILL DON’T! I DON’T EVEN HAVE AN EXCUSE. I’m done. I’m done with myself.

  • Jennifer persilver

    I have always been myself. But high school has gotten to me. Today on March 3, 2017 a boy wanted a hug. So, I gave him one and when I did he kissed me on the cheek. Now I have muscle spasm and every now and then it loses control. Well my arm lost control and punched the boy in the face. I knew it hurt I went in class and started to cry. I feel so bad now and I hate myself. Bad part about it was that the boy had a big crush on me and I had one on him. We just didn’t know til now. I wanna kill myself but I know that I think is not gon fix a thing. I have been crying all day since 1:00pm. That’s how bad it really was. Now he hates me and if I could go back in time I will. But I can’t do that so I gotta find another way to fix this but I don’t know how. I HATE MYSELF!!!!!!

  • Melissa Gaydos

    Believe in miracles😇

  • Mark Ciroca

    I’m an over educated county
    correctional officer. I wasted my time getting a criminal justice degree and now I work with immature people (guards) everyday. I had dreams of better. The past 5 years out of college haven’t been any easier. I failed a field exam in OCS and was discharged from the military. I recently re-enlisted. I still don’t get the wasted time back where I could have accomplished something else or learned something useful. I have come to hate myself. Although, I always did. High school I was usually alone as well as college. I have threatened to kill myself multiple times, but never carried it out

    • Mark, please don’t give up. Please don’t define yourself by the past. It sounds like you are smart and have accomplished a lot already – obtaining a college degree, working full-time, being in the military. Please don’t hate yourself. Take some time to chat with a HopeCoach and maybe we can help you find a new perspective and fresh direction. You are a gifted, talented, and caring young man and the world needs people like you. Chat with us anytime 24/7 – click the “chat now” button or go to this link https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp We look forward to getting to know you and helping you through this battle!

  • Matt

    Everyone always asked what’s wrong, and if I can’t answer I feel like I’m insulting them for trying to help. When I do have an answer it’s an onslaught of insanity that comes like a flood. People tend to run when this comes out. Eventually they just stop coming back. All I want is somebody to understand but I push the ones who might be able to help further away. Or even worse, they sit, listen, try to understand, and just end up patronizing me which only makes me feel worse. The silence is the worst part. When everyone’s asleep, he’s all I can hear. Screaming at me. Whispering to me. I can’t make the voices stop. They always have the worst ideas. Horrible ideas that I would never be able to go through with.

    • Have you been to see a doctor? You may need to talk to someone who can help you sort through it all and figure out what is wrong. We have trained HopeCoaches available 24/7 to chat with you and we have resources to help you. Please click the “chat now” button or go to this page – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  • A. Lone

    I have hated myself since I was a kid. I am 47 years old and a mess. I have been blessed with a wonderful husband and beautiful kids. I have people who admire me and love me, yet I hate me. I never feel I can do anything right. I mess everything up. Right now what I am messing up is my marriage. The one thing I have always believed in was the love of my husband. Of course with hating myself I suffer from depression and anxiety issues. Somehow this has affected my libido. first without meds it was messed up. I love my husband to no end, but as time went by I lost it. Then a situational issue came up and BAM… depression hit. It hit hard. I went to doc and got on meds and it helped, but throughout the years the meds have not helped with the libido issue. Now, a few months short of 20 years of marriage my husband has had it. He doesn’t care that it is an illness, he hates that I wouldn’t even let him hug me. I didn’t even realize I was that bad. Now he is ready to walk and I am in shock. My depression went crazy. I have been going to my doctor for years begging for help with the libido thing. Our marriage counselor suggested I get on Bupropion,, which helps with weight and libido.. why did my doc not suggest this earlier? I asked and she said it doesn’t help with the anxiety issues I have. All I know is that i hate myself even more and have in the last week of being off my anti-d in order to switch to the new one have had thoughts of suicide. I know better and know how it affects those left behind as my aunt did this when I was 13. it was devastating. i don’t want to do that to anyone, but I just want this ickyness of me to stop. I am in such pain. I hate it… I hate me for doing this to me and everyone… why can’t I stop hating me

  • Duyugodu Ayosdi

    I’ve never been worth it or good enough for anyone.

  • Roro

    I’m so stupid. I can’t do anything right, I’m 26 I have a degree in something that I’m not good at, I seriously don’t know what to do, people tell me I’m ugly all the time, no man ever found me attractive, I feel sorry for my family they raised me and spent alot of money on me, but still I’m good for nothing, I think if I die it wd be much easier for them at least I wd not waste their money, time and efforts.

    • Only really really mean people would tell someone that they are ugly- that says more about who they are and what kind of problems they have. I am sorry you have not yet found something you enjoy doing and can feel successful in. The fact that you completed a degree is a HUGE accomplishment.
      There is something out there that you are good at and it is just a matter of exploring ideas and options of what that might be. What are your hobbies? interests? Chatting with a HopeCoach about how you are feeling can be really helpful right now. We are here for you 24/7. Just click the “chat now” button or go to this link https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  • Lelio Marino

    Thanks man that made me feel really good on an especially hard night

  • Nothing

    I hate myself. I have for sometime. I have people who care about me and I care about them, but I hate myself. I don’t know the exact cause for this, I just know that my life is going nowhere and I am not important. I often wish that someone would just kill me! Why? Because I can’t even harm myself. I am too scared. I just wish someone would do it for me. Or that I would get some disease and just die. But I will be okay and continue to hate myself for a long time. There is nothing that is going to stop this. Some days I am okay with hating myself. Some days I actually feel bitter sweet about my depression. I feel that it is okay that I hate myself.

  • fuck

    i hate how my skin are full with pimples and i hate how flawless everyone around me are. to make things more worst, not only having an ugly face but also im careless. i can be so careless. i left a scratch on my friend’s car. i made my parents dissapointed. i bring no good to people. you can see how bad my life is. i hate myself. i want to die.

  • Mel

    As a college student trying to figure out her life, I feel like its slowly turning to sh*t. I’m not motivated to go to classes (even though I really want to go but just sleep through the alarms), I stopped hanging out with people in general and would rather be at home alone, I stopped caring about what I looked like but then all I would do was care about what I look like and how other people view me. I never really liked how I looked but my boyfriend of five years always told me otherwise. In my family I feel like the rut compared to my cousins. I’m the struggling art student while my cousins graduated with honors for law and the other for nursing. I create beautiful art pieces, but my grades are just plummeting. I feel.. empty I guess? And I feel like a total failure compared to my cousins. My mind is telling me to do better, but I get too scared to listen to it. I’m just tired of crying every night figuring out what I’m going to do with my life and if I’m going to ‘survive’ in the real world. I’m unhappy and when I’m at home I have to pretend to be the goofy daughter whose ‘happy-go-lucky’ and listen to my family talking about success, grades, and being better. They don’t know that for most of my life, I’ve just wanted to disappear from it all. Not so much as suicide (although I’ve had those thoughts when I was younger) but just to leave everyone behind and leave the worries too and go live somewhere else by myself.