Does My Best Friend Like or Love Me? Signs to Know

I talk a lot about how people seem to be in such a hurry to rush into a dating relationship. I always emphasize how important it is to develop a strong friendship as a foundation before heading into romance. Say you've done this, what's next?

Lucy asked our first 'best guy friend' question:

Does my best guy friend like me as more than just a friend? And how do I know if he is falling in love with me?

Maybe you are wondering, "Is this really love?"

Friendship and dating are very important. In the end, best friends make great marriages. That being said, since you didn't say what your feelings are for this guy, I'm guessing you don't have romantic feelings for him. So for him, this is unquestionably a very delicate situation.

If he is actually falling in love with you, he's probably scared and nervous about you finding out, since he doesn't know how you'll respond.

He doesn't want to do anything to jeopardize the friendship you already have. That's a good thing.  Friendships are priceless and need protecting and nurturing so they will grow.

Here are a couple of questions you may want to ask yourself:

When you talk with your friend about other people who you are dating, or are interested in, is he supportive and encouraging, or does he become quiet and distant? A friend will be supportive, but someone whose emotions are clouded with the possibility of being in love will tend to have a more emotional response.

Does he want to spend time only with you, or is he okay doing things with you together with others? A friend is willing to share you with others, but someone who is trying to balance their emotional feelings toward you may tend to be a bit more possessive.

In the end, you will need to communicate with each other and define what your relationship really is.

Even though it may hurt him, if you don't have the same feelings for him that he has for you, knowing the truth is always better than not.

However you feel about him, I'm sure what you tell him will be filled with love and respect. After all, a good close friend of the opposite sex is priceless.

Rebecca brings us our next question about moving from friendship to dating:

How can you tell if the friendship SHOULD go on to the next level?

The decision to take a friendship to the next level, from friendship to a dating relationship, has to be a mutual decision. Both sides have to agree they want to go deeper with the other person.

These Things Have to Be Talked Out.

Unless they are talked out, there can be confusion and hurt feelings. So whoever brings up the subject has put themselves in somewhat of a vulnerable position. Yet, good friendships can endure these trying times.

The Best Thing I Can Tell You is to Be Patient.

Let the relationship grow, and when you feel like you're ready, I'd encourage you to find a time when the two of you are alone, and try bringing up the topic. With a friendship based on honesty and trust, you will be able to face the challenge of being vulnerable.

The Right Thing to Say:

Try saying something like, "You're a great friend, and I don't ever want that to change. And honestly, I've always wondered if this friendship would ever turn into something deeper. But I'm not sure how we would know. Do you have any ideas?" Asking him for his opinion is a great way to show you value what he thinks and feels, and you'll find out if you're on track.

Let's assume for a moment your guy friend agrees with you about taking the relationship to the next level. What then should you do? I would encourage you to sit down together and make a list of the things you have been doing that have made your friendship so strong. Commit to keep doing them, and your relationship will automatically grow. But be extremely careful about becoming very affectionate and sexual with each other. I have seen so many potentially great relationships ruined by the misuse of sex. As someone once said, if you settle for cheap sex, you will never discover priceless love.

Life is short. So be open and honest with your feelings, but be prepared for them not to be reciprocated. But with him knowing how you feel, you very well might open the door for him to start seeing you in a different, more romantic light.

 Still wondering if the feelings are mutual? Read this blog to find out if it's really love. 

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75 comments on “Does My Best Friend Like or Love Me? Signs to Know”

  1. I wanted an advice so here it goes.. I have three guy best friends. The first one is a jock and he can neither resist me nor get angry at me.. While the second one is very sweet. He treats me like a princess and often told me he would pick me over his crushes (once, he told me he would rather marry me than his other girls). And the last one is the guy I like so much I could imagine myself married to him. My third guy best friend (the one I like) always try to get my attention in different annoying ways our teachers, class mates and school mates think is in fact, very sweet and cute. I confessed to him three days ago but he laughed at me and sang "I don't care" but held my hand anyway. Two days ago, my first guy best friend confessed to me and I panicked for a bit and ended up leaving without a word. And yesterday, my second guy best friend confessed to me and kept sending me signals that he wanted to date me. Everyone roots for me and my crush but I don't want to hurt the other two's feelings even though I know my crush wouldn't like me ever (i'm not sure tho). What do I do? My friendship with them is my treasure. </3

  2. Ok so me and my guy friend have known each other for at least 6 years now and not in till now I have felt feelings for him and my other friend told him this and he asked me out because he felt the same way so I said yes but now it is a little awkward but when he flirts with me I don't know how to respond. What should I do?Plz help!

  3. okay so my best guy friend (we met at a snowboard team) said I look good in regular clothes. Also on the chair lifts sometimes our arms touch and he does not move them away. Also 4 of my snowboard friends shipped us and 1 of them said it looks like we both like each other. He also called me his best friend. Also to his mom and dad he said I was a trustworthy person. Though he said all that we have not had a real romantic holding hands saying I love you or kissing moment. But I once caught him staring at me and on does he like me quizzes I usually get a yes he does result. were both in6 grade too. WHATS HAPPENING PLZZZZZ HELP PLZZZZ

  4. I met my best guy friend about a year ago and ever since we've actually been really close, all of my friends and his friends shipped us (said that we looked like a couple). I didn't have feelings for him at first, but I developed feelings for him, and now I am very into him. My best guy friend, on the other hand, didn't really deny not being my boyfriend when my friend commented on how he wanted to spend more time with his "girlfriend" (a.k.a. me). He doesn't really deny anything regarding him liking me, but I'm not sure if he likes me because he seems closer with my friend than me... What should I do?

  5. My best friend guy lives back in my home country. He used to call me almost everyday until recently he started talking to me twice a day everyday. He keeps saying I'm cute and that he loves me. He says things like if I'm lonely that he would come to me and give me a hug or cuddle me. Today he even asked me to give him a kiss through the call and he gave me few too. But in the middle of the conversation he talked about some other girls and also mentioned that I'm his best friend. I'm confused. I feel like I'm falling for him too but I don't know if he really does like me. Help me please.

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