Posts by TheHopeLine Team

Are You Feeling Overwhelmed?

I came across this site by accident but I'm so glad that I did. I have been in a bad place for a while and when I found TheHopeLine.com I was feeling completely overwhelmed. I had no one to talk to because not a lot of people knew what was going on in my life. I spoke about the issues I was having for the first time in four years. I had never been able to do that before.

I felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders and it gave me the boost I needed to feel hopeful again.

-Lily

Related Posts:
Megan's Struggle With Anxiety Disorder
How To Find Sanity In An Insane World
Mental Illness Is Not Mental Weakness

If you are feeling stressed, overwhelmed and dealing with anxiety. TheHopeLine's free eBook can help you to understand the causes of anxiety and how to deal with it all.

You never know until you Live Life what might happen.

TheHopeLine has partnered again with Vlogsters, to bring you this video.  Vlogsters is a group of millennials sharing hope through their videos.  This is a great video for those that are struggling, or even those just in the mundanes of every day life...going to school, studying, working, living, breathing...a reminder that not every day of life is going to be a wild ride.  It's about the journey, the small, quiet moments and not just the destination.  Vlogster Adrian Nuno shared: "My hope is that it is a thought-provoking video and it can inspire others to keep on going through the hard days."

Live. Life. - YouTube

When you are young, you are given the impression that every day of your life needs to be a day of countless adventures. From movies to books to commercials, you are given the impression that life should be a wild ride. And sometimes, it is. But in so many other ways, that isn't the case.

Related Posts:
How To Follow Your Dreams
How Katie Made A difference In Uganda
School Assignment Changed Veronica's Life

For most of us, that idea of a wild life is getting up early in the morning to go to a job, or to a class that you can't wait for to end. For some of us, that idea of a wild life is staying up late at night, pondering about who we are and what we are. Some nights, those thoughts can enchant us. But other nights, those thoughts can haunt us. Haunt us that we aren't doing enough, or that we aren't living the life that we should be living. That's life.

Yes, we might be young. But for some of us, we just aren't living that wild and crazy lifestyle of adventures. Because that's not what real life is. In reality, you need to wonder what your next meal might be, or what your plans for the weekend will be that doesn't end with you going broke.

And we dream, or at least I do. I dream of hopefully making a name for myself one day. I dream that one day, I will be able to look at my troubles and say that they were well worth it. I dream that one day, I can truly be living what I dream of doing: entertaining others. Whether that be making movies, hosting a talk show or hosting the Oscars. If it were all three, that'd be pretty awesome.

But let's not get too bogged down in that. Hopefully, it will happen someday. But for now, it remains a dream.

For me, it is what keeps me going. It is what makes every late night doing homework or every hectic week worth it. Because I know it will hopefully lead me down the path to do something great. For now, I don't let my hectic work schedule and classes and homework stop me from doing what I love. I still edit movies, I still edit videos and I still film videos. For now, it just remains a passionate hobby. Hopefully though, it will soon be a passionate way of making a living.

People who won't take the simple way out for an answer. Because as someone once said, it is those who think that they can change the world that are the ones who do. Because they had the audacity to do what others wouldn't even think of.

Life is like a car driving down an empty road sometimes. You just keep going and going, even if you may not know where you are headed. And along the way, you see moments of utter beauty that just take your breath away. That's the key though, you just need to keep on going, because you'll never know what you'll end up discovering. Life is full of surprises. Some of them will be pleasant, others not so much. But what's important is that you keep on going. Because who knows?

Tomorrow, you just might win the lottery, or run into the star of your dreams, or meet that special someone who loves you for who you are. Maybe your class might get cancelled and you'll get to hop back in your bed for another hour. Or maybe, you just might get that big deal that will make your dreams come true. But you'll never know unless you try, unless you try to live life. So that's all I ask. That's it. Two simple words.

Live. Life.
-Adrian Nuno

Are you struggling with a hard day?  Do you have a way of getting through the hard times or the mundane times?  We would love for you to comment below and share how you live life on the hard days.

You might also want to check out Dawson's blog: How to Follow Your Dreams.

And check out one of Vlogster's other videos, a powerful slam poem, inspired by a girl who died by suicide: All Too Soon.

Do You Struggle With Self-Harm Like Lucy?

Lucy wrote to us at TheHopeLine® about a chat she had with a HopeCoach. 

I was about to self-harm and I didn't know where to turn so I went on here (TheHopeLine.com/gethelp) and this girl, a HopeCoach named Emily, talked with me. I was going to cut myself that day and she talked me out of it. I was lucky that she was there because when I cut myself it was bad. I'm clean now and its all thanks to her.

A special thanks to Emily and TheHopeLine®!
-Lucy

Related Posts:
A Door of Hope
Why Do People Self-Harm?
Real Story: Artist Michaela Hatfield
How To Quit Cutting

If you or someone you know struggles with self-harm, download TheHopeLine's free eBook: Understanding Self-Harm. You can also connect with our partners at Door of Hope. You are not alone.

"I feel happier!"  I was just going to say, thank all of ya'll for the help. Now, I'm not starving myself anymore, I've been eating more. Unfortunately, I haven't gained any weight, but I feel better and have tons of energy. I've gotten my depression and anxiety under control, without drugs. I haven't been suicidal anymore. 

I Found Help for My Eating Disorder at TheHopeLine

I have opened up more to my parents and been telling the truth. I have a better relationship with my parents, siblings, and to God. I have given God my problems now and I've been reading my Bible and praying daily and more to God. And, I've been clean from cutting for two days now.

I feel happier now and like my life is back on track. Thank you for all of the help :)
-Hannah

If you struggle with self-harm, depression, or an eating disorder, TheHopeLine® is here to help. Check out TheHopeLine's eBooks and chat with a HopeCoach.

When I found TheHopeLine on Google, I found the answers I was looking for.

My story goes like this:

For the past few months, I've been learning an ice skating routine for a competition in March and there was a lad who wouldn't leave me alone to concentrate.  I was forgetting the routine, getting stressed about the moves, and getting snappy with everyone. I go to the ice rink, not to stand around and chat, but to skate and practice what I need to learn. But I couldn't with Kirean around and I was getting more and more stressed. People started thinking I had anger problems and weren't even talking to me because I couldn't talk about what was bothering me. I didn't want people to think I was horrible.

After chatting on here with a HopeCoach, I realized I just needed to tell my coach, Ryan, that I'm getting confused and stressed about the routine and I don't mean to be sharp and snappy with him.

And I need to tell Kirean when I'm not practicing I can hang out and have a laugh with him, but skating time is practice time.

Thank you TheHopeLine!
Roxie (from the UK)

If you are dealing with a situation where you are unsure of what to do and feel frustrated or stressed, connect with a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine.  We are here for you, not only to listen but also help you figure out how to deal with what you are going through.

I can't go into all the details but the person with whom I spoke with kept me from killing myself.

I'm in a very dark place at this time but they helped me see just the tiniest bit of light at the end of this road. I can't say it won't happen again but I will say at least I will try to come back if things get black again. Thanks.
Monia

If you are in a dark place right now and need someone to help you see the light, connect with a HopeCoach. Or if this is an emergency and you or a friend needs support, right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 for free confidential, 24/7 help. For a list of crisis centers around the world and additional help, please visit the suicide prevention resource page. 

When I logged onto your app, I was lost, devastated and heart broken. I have had a lot of bad things happen to me in the past, and I've done a lot of bad things as well, but one of your HopeCoaches, unfortunately who will remains anonymous to me, saved my life today.

I had been through a rough break up for the second time and betrayed by a good friend of mine and I thought about leaving it all behind...and if it wasn't for this person I met through you guys, I would have gone through with it.  I constantly turned my back on God throughout my life, but after today, I know Jesus will always be there for me..to carry me through all my hard times that I have yet to still overcome.

What you people do, it's amazing and liberating and selfless.

I love all of you so much. My name is JonPaul.  I'm a 25 year old college student out of Colorado, and I am so glad I met you all. You, the person I met tonight, who showed me the light and the right path I should take, I want you to know you made me very happy, and I love you deeply.

Even though you are a stranger...you saved my life and my mind from total destruction.

I am forever in debt to your grace. And I hope one day, I get to meet you. Thank you for listening to me, and hearing my heartbreaking story. You made my world a better place to be in. Thank you again!
JohnPaul

"We all know that when we physically lose people we love, that part of them is never lost because they are always in our hearts.
But for me, there are times like this morning, when the giant hole in my heart seems to get bigger and bigger. As the teardrops continue to fall and enlarge the hole, it feels like you get farther and farther away...And that unbearable feeling, of your seeming to get farther and farther away, the feeling of losing touch with what is in my heart, restarts the cycle."
-Mel

Mel is a suicide survivor. She has survived the loss of her son.  He died by suicide.

His name is Alec.  He was 25 years old and shot himself on 2/10/14.  He was an Airforce Reserve Airman and a phlebotomist and worked in a hospital lab.  You can tell by talking to Mel how much she loved her son.  He was successful and had a lot of friends but Mel started to see over time that there was something broken in Alec.  One bad choice led to another.  He wouldn't listen to anyone.  He wouldn't talk to anyone.  His brother said one time, that his biggest problem was that Alec thought he was smarter than everyone else.  This translated into him not wanting to go to anyone to ask for help.  His mom says: "he was too stubborn to ever let anyone help him with anything and his foot was stuck in the 'alcohol door' which had many resulting consequences.  He was muddling along with the emotional support of a girlfriend and when she broke up with him, it was the last straw for him “ he just gave up.

The one thing that really keeps Mel going is that she saw her son give his life to the Lord at an Acquire the Fire event.  It's encouraging for her to know that one day she will see her son again because she knows that God keeps His promises.  God promises that if we give our life to him and ask Him to be our savior and forgive us of our sins then He will, and that's all it takes to get to heaven.  Mel says: "For those few that take the heartbreaking path that Alex went on, at least they had the opportunity to know the Lord."

Like so many others, Alec probably had no idea of how many lives he had touched and how many people loved him.  On the Facebook page set up in his memory, there are so many stories about his sense of humor, how he was always smiling, joking, laughing.  And how he encouraged and helped so many people in his life. 

Here are just a few of the comments taken from Facebook:

It's hard to fathom that you're no longer with us. It feels like yesterday we were passing notes and sneaking out of our houses to meet each other In the middle of the night...I hated walking back home in the dark by myself. You would walk me back so I wasn't scared or the nights where you would knock on my window scaring the hell out of me. lol. I will never forget those bus rides home after soccer games. You were my seat/snack partner. You were my first love and will always have a place in my heart.

Rest In Paradise brother. Very very sad and upset that you're gone. I remember I could talk to Alec about anything. He always used to check up on me in Jacksonville from time to time. Obviously I fell short somewhere. I just wish there was a way that I could say one last word, have one last conversation, one last look at that genuine human being god placed on this earth to share smiles and love... I am going to miss Alec a lot.

Alec probably never knew the immense effect he had on me. When I was a painfully shy, self-conscious high schooler, Alec's genuine kindness and sweet smile went such a long way. We weren't considered "great" friends, nor did he ever know the crazy crush I had on him throughout our high school years, but his smile will always shine bright in my mind. Gone too soon, you are clearly missed so so much. Rest easy, sweet boy.

If you are a survivor of suicide loss....

you have been through a traumatic experience of losing a loved one to suicide.  This will be something that will stay with you forever.  Suicide can be very different than losing a family member in a different way other than to suicide. 

There are feelings and emotions that can be unique to losing someone to suicide:

Guilt “ You may feel as if you could have stopped the suicide.
Stigma “ Society still attaches a stigma to suicide.
Anger “ You may feel anger towards the person you lost, as they are also the murderer of the person you loved.
Disconnection “ You may feel disconnected from the person you lost and their memories because they made a choice to end their life.

If you or a friend need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, for free confidential, 24/7 help. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world. For additional help, please visit the suicide prevention resource page.

If you want to understand more about suicide or if you are having suicidal thoughts, download our free eBook.

Why "Netflix & chill" sells us short...

This phrase, "Netflix & chill" has become the one-liner for the past couple of years. Lately, it's the late-night text or tweet that you'll get from someone who doesn't want you, they just want something from you. Now before I dive in, I'm not trying to call someone out. I just want our generation to realize what we are missing out on. We weren't made for this. The phrase "Netflix & chill" is so much deeper than just those words. It signifies settling for something "average," taking the easy way out, being cheap, and lacking confidence and respect. These days, most guys get away with using this phrase to lure a girl into an uncomfortable situation. Hey, I'm just being real. It's the truth, but it's an evil truth. God didn't create a young man to pursue and "love" in a way that defies Himself or cheapens the worth of a young girl. Pursuit was meant to be true and right.

I realize that not everyone who begins texting and talking will end up seriously dating, but if you begin any sort of "relationship idea" with this phrase, chances are that's all it's going to be. I want ladies to listen up on that. I've made crucial mistakes in my past, been in positions that defy God, yet as a young man, that's why I've learned the importance of seizing God's best. The world pushes us to be cheap and lazy, instead of taking a girl out on a date. Simply put, Netflix in your bedroom isn't a date. Let's be honest. I believe as a generation of young men that it is time to kill this "cheap" vibe and pursue it in a respectful manner. Ladies don't fall for tricks. As men, we are tricky. We have this thing called the sinful nature in us. This nature ("beastly" for lack of a better word) wants to take over at times.

Picture it this way: "Netflix & chill" is like a ring you get out of a vending machine at the store. It's plastic, cool at first site, then hours later you throw it away because it is cheap and truly sucks. Am I dogging on Netflix? No, I love Netflix, it's just the symbolism here.

On the other hand, going out on a real date, talking in person and not texting, that's like a real diamond. It's the real deal. It's not cheap, and at the end of the day, we will all take a diamond ring over a plastic ring (unless you're just real dumb). The point I want to make clear is that sitting down and having some popcorn while turning on some Netflix is not a bad thing. It's just not first date status, probably not the next couple dates either (tips for you guys). It's not the real deal.

Ladies, if that's the first text you get when he wants to hang out, RUN. It's not the real thing.

Our world lacks that, don't you think? Everyone has to be on their cell phone at all times, and dates aren't even a thing. I believe we can change that if we focus on what's true, not what is easy. Genuine time together doesn't happen when you lock yourself in a room together. We all know what happens in that situation, and truth is...building a relationship on the physical will not last...EVER. Don't test it. I promise God won't lie to you. Let's not be sucked into the culture our generation has produced. I love this generation, but I want to see growth and change. I'm sure you do too. You only settle for the plastic ring when you choose "Netflix & chill." It won't produce good results, and God surely has something better for you.

Three final things to remember:

1. Netflix is cool, just make sure you don't abuse it just to get in bed with someone.
2. We need more authentic men. Pursue a girl's heart with real love and communication.
3. Don't fall for the cheap stuff ladies. I'm not talking about money because you don't have to have an expensive date to show some love (I'm a broke college student). I'm saying, don't give in to an immature guy's tricks. It isn't worth it.

Thanks for reading. Don't settle for the cheap stuff.
Carson Case - The guest blog is written by Carson Case, a young guy who is faithfully pursuing God.  He believes that every person matters.  "You just need to take the time to listen and understand where they're coming from."